You took the big step to get out of your bad relationship, but you went right back. You feel so connected to the person, but it’s a distorted way you’ve been thinking and that way of thinking has you trapped in a relationship that has brought you nothing but heartache. Many individuals go back to bad relationships. It’s NOT because they’re truly in love with the individual (although really feel they do), it’s because of their own personal insecurities.
Think about it, a person has to be insecure along with other issues to keep leaving and going back into a bad situation. Most times when a person leaves and goes back it becomes worst. Every time you leave and go back you give power to the other individual. They know that they have that control over you. They know what to say and how to treat you to get you to come back and once you’re back they go back to doing what they were doing before you left. It’s a vicious cycle that often times end in tragedy.
Some of you knew the bad situations you were in before you chose to go deeper into them, YET you still chose to do so. It’s because of the mess inside of you. What’s inside pours out in the desires of the heart. You’re not thinking rationally, you’re allowing that feeling you’re experiencing to lead you wrong. Many of you are living a lie. You’re pretending to be happy for your family and friends, but in reality your far from it. Some of you are even afraid to leave. You’ve stayed way too long and now you’re too afraid to leave. On the other hand some of you feel you can’t do better. It’s all distorted thinking and the wrong way of believing.
Stop seeking something in someone else that you can’t give to yourself. Learn that you’re more important than anyone other than God. If you don’t love you (for real), then what you give and receive will not be what’s right for you. It will be something received through a wrong way of thinking and believing. It all comes from being messed up inside. We have to start dealing with who we are and cleaning out the junk, before we pile more stuff on it. No one can effectively deal with a relationship when they’re full of mess. It’s impossible. You can fake it, but the truth always shows in your bad decisions. It shows in what you accept from others and how you allow others to treat you.
Your significant others knows exactly where they have you! If you take anything and everything as I always say “it is exactly what you will get.” They will expect you to take it, because it’s what you’ve always done. The way you avoid bad situations is BY NOT GETTING INTO THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE. If you do you won’t have to worry about being fearful of leaving, getting abused, being trapped into something not good for you. If you’re being treated wrong from the start, NEVER move any further, remove yourself from that person and that situation. STOP thinking it’s a first and last time occurrence, more than likely it will not be. If a person gets away with it from the start, they are bound to try it again.
Remember, if you felt a need to leave you felt that way for a reason. Why do you think it will change if you went back? So many people have lost their lives by going back. No one should allow anyone to do them any kind of way they want. You shouldn’t give no one that type of power over you. If you lose your power you’ve lost control. If you let a person do you any way they feel, it gives the person strength to do something else. This is what happens in many relationships. Both men and women lose their power to who they’re with and freely I may add. It happens for many reasons, but the bottom line is IT SHOULDN’T EVER HAPPEN.
Stop leaving bad situations only to go back. Stop going back to receive more of what you were getting. Stop giving people the power to control and manipulate you and the situation. Stop getting into situations you know are bad for you by thinking with your brains FIRST. Start looking at your situations and analyzing them before getting off into the deep end. I don’t care how cute they are or what they have to offer. Stop being distracted by things that they’re using to lure you in and see the ENTIRE picture. Run as if you’re running for your life from situations that are bad for you, because before it’s over you just may be running for your life. It all can be avoided from the start.
Please start seeing the truth for what it is. Stop allowing your hearts to lead and guide you into bad situations. I do know some people go back and the situations sometimes changes and things get better. However, this takes growth and maturity. The person CAN’T remind the same and you think it’s going to get better. Some changing must occur. I’m trying to save somebody. In relationships such as this, some people lose their lives and others wish they were dead. People lose focus of who they are, they end up completely broken. No one EVER has to be in these types of situations, by seeing the truth from the very start and accepting it as such.