This seems to be the way of the world today. There are many people in what’s supposed to be committed relationships, yet they display no signs of commitment. Many of these people are in marriages.
I may not know your personal stories, but I know enough about relationships to be able to address what I’m writing. People are getting into and staying in relationships for all of the wrong reasons. Where is the love? Love is the foundation whereas communication is the key. One can’t effectively coexist without the other.
This is why many marriages and relationships leading into marriage are falling by the wayside. People don’t know how to effectively and properly build relationships. I’ve written about this in earlier posts. As recent as this week I spoke to someone who is divorcing. She told me she thought she could change her husband of 4 years. She told me looking back she saw signs of it being bad, but she loved him and had hopes he would change. Guess what? He didn’t and four years later he still wasn’t committed to his wife or the relationship.
You can’t change a person who isn’t ready to change. A person may change for a moment to either get you or to shut you up, but it WILL NOT last if it’s not the truth. They will always go back to the person they really are.
How you start a relationship oftentimes will be a part of if not the reason it ends. If you go into a relationship allowing yourself to be disrespected and mistreated, it’s EXACTLY how you will continue to be treated. You’ve set the standards for how you’re treated. When you’re so willing to take any and everything, because you can’t see past your emotions, any and everything is exactly the dish you’ll be served.
Some people will NEVER learn. Why go further into something when there are signs all over the place showing it’s not good for you? You can’t change a person no matter how much you love them, no matter how good you treat them, etc. etc. You can’t change them unless they’re ready and willing to change.
Many in marital relationships are merely sharing a domain and that’s it. Some of these people don’t even like one another, yet they remain together while one or both are in relationships with people outside of their marriages. A lot of times one really wants the relationship and is often heartbroken; while their significant other cares less and are out doing whatever they want. They didn’t care less in the beginning, but it was ignored. A zebra doesn’t change stripes, the signs are always there.
Too many people want it all. They get into relationships while having someone on the side. They claim unhappiness and everything else, yet many remain in their relationships, while getting involved and pulling someone else into their drama.
Grow up! Most are over grown (of age) but they conduct themselves as immature individuals who don’t have a clue as to what they really want. Before these types of people get into relationships they need to get themselves together. Whoever accept these individuals need to know they have issues with some forms of insecurities. You can’t blame the other person, you must take responsibility for the decisions you make. Stop allowing your emotions to set you up for a big fall. It’s not love that’s blind at all, it’s individuals who are blind by emotions (NOT love).
If you can’t commit then you should omit the thought of getting into a relationship until you know you are ready. It will save you and your significant other a lot of heartache and headache later down the road.