I wanted to touch bases on the subject of friendship, because many don’t seem to know what it means. The word many, includes those so called friends and the one’s who like them. Time and time again I’ve written about how we think, feel, and act comes from past experiences it molds us into who we are (good or bad). It affects our choosing the people we call friends into our lives.
Sometimes a person want so much to be loved or a part of a group that they choose the wrong individual/s or social group to be a part of. People of all walks of life do this. What a person has or don’t have has nothing to do with the decisions they make. It seem like it does, but the reality is it all comes from what lies within. You know the saying “when a person show you who they are, believe it.” This is true across the board in all types of relationships.
First; to know a friend, you must first know yourself and secondly you must know how to be a friend. I believe the problem with most friendships is the person who is doing the befriending has issues going on that causes them to dismiss the truth about their so called friend/s. All they want is to have a friend, but they’re overlooking the fact that the person they’re befriending isn’t remotely trying to be a friend to them.
There are many people who give and give to their friend/s and what they get in return are hands sticking out for more. The person doing the befriending can’t see they are being used and manipulated, all they care about is they’re receiving some type of acceptance (when they really aren’t). These types of friends are in your life for as long as your benefits are available (whatever the benefits). Once you stop giving the benefits they are on to the next person they can use and manipulate.
These types of friends will act as if they care about you for as long as you’re willing to dish out to them what they want. These friends will more than likely not be there for you, they make excuses for not seeing you, they don’t extend back to you the willingess to want to be to you the type of friend you are to them. They are what we call “hater/s” and many or either openly or secretly envy, jealous, and pretentious.
If you have a friend that doesn’t really seem to be there for you, it’s because they aren’t. They’re not interested in you, they’re interested in what you have to offer no matter what it is. When you open your eyes to the truth, then you can see the truth. Stop trying to force yourself into the lives of a person or people who don’t really want you there. These people aren’t your friends they are what we call “so-called friends.” They will hurt you in some way because they don’t really care. Their agenda is different from yours! They will smile in your place while stabbing you in the back.
It’s time to learn who you are and what you’re willing to accept and not accept (don’t waver, don’t be persuaded). Deal with why you open yourself up to these individuals. You’re lacking something you are trying to find by allowing people into your lives that don’t have the same intentions as you. You don’t need anyone in your life who doesn’t mean you any good. You certainly don’t need to buy a friend. You don’t need a friend who only know you for what you have to offer or how you can assist them.
It’s very important to note the fact that those so called friends are also individuals who have issues that has caused them to be the people they are. Regardless, don’t allow anyone to take advantage of you (no matter what). Accept the truth as it’s presented.
The greatest way to avoid these types of people is by first loving thyself. As I’ve written many times before, people only treat you how you allow; whether good or bad. Once you learn to love you, you will then know your worth and value. You will no longer entertain in your lives those who mean you no good.