Seeking Love in a Loveless Relationship

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I don’t know how many ways to say it or write it. You’re being treated the way you allow yourself to be treated. Loving him or her isn’t enough when they don’t love you. Stop putting yourself in situations where you’re used and taken advantage of. Stop giving everything you have thinking it will make him or her feel about you the way you feel about them. It won’t!

Love is only a figment of your imagination when you’re not loved in return. Far too many people are in loveless relationships. It’s loveless when it’s one sided. You loving him or her means nothing if they don’t love you back. If you loved yourself you wouldn’t ever allow someone to treat you any way they want. If you loved yourself you wouldn’t be desperate to be loved by someone who doesn’t love you.

Look at yourself and deal with you! Stop trying to love someone and give them your heart when you don’t even love yourself. You and your heart will be trampled on. Love isn’t one sided, not at all. A person who truly loves you knows it’s a word with action, which does NOT mean using you and taking you for granted. People who treat you this way are all for self, it doesn’t involve loving you. They know what they want and they know it’s not you! Stop selling yourself short! A significant other will stay in a relationship knowing full well their minds and hearts are many moons away! A person will ONLY treat you how you allow them to treat you! If you have no standards or requirements, then you get none! It’s as simple as that!

In these types of relationships, there is always someone else in the equation. The people you’re involved with always have other agendas. Matter of fact, they are people who aren’t happy with self. They too don’t know how to give or receive love. Love starts with you; the individual. You must be able to love yourself before you can effectively and in a healthy manner love someone else! If you don’t you will take or do anything in the name of love; when it’s not love at all!

The problem with many folks is they are too busy seeking something most never really experienced before. Instead of focusing on self they put all emphasis on the person they chose, when technically that person hasn’t chosen them. Regardless of how good a person makes you feel, if they don’t feel the same as you, it’s not about you. Sadly many people try to force something with someone when it was ever meant to be. This is why many are in unhealthy and loveless relationships.

The person you love is definitely some of the problem, but your biggest problem is yourself. People get all wrapped in their feelings and emotions allowing them to take control. Anything you have given your power to has control over you, (feelings, emotions, people, things). People who never really loved you or wanted to be with you will always show it in some way or show how. Those who deny it are denying the truth! It’s why they are in loveless relationships. They believe it’s love, but it’s not! Many people hold themselves back from true love trying to hang on to somone who wasn’t ever intended for them.

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If They Don’t Want You, They Don’t Want you

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Nothing you do will work and you’re wasting your time! A lot of people are in relationships and they are unhappy, they are doing everything they can think of to hold on to the individual, yet it’s not working. Guess what? Unless the individual loves you and wants to be with you, nothing you do will matter.
The individual will take whatever you offer, but they still won’t want to be with you! People need to stop acting powerless and clueless. Face reality and accept things as they are. Life goes on! Stop walking around with your eyes open, but not seeing a thing because you’re blind by your feelings.

Most people are in bad, unhealthy, and unhappy relationships because they are trying to do everything they can to keep someone who doesn’t want to be with kept by them.

Sometimes people think if they sex them enough it will keep them.
No, it won’t! Sometimes people think if they buy them a lot of things it will keep them. No it wont! Sometimes people think if they forsake their family and friends it will keep them. No it won’t! Sometimes people think if they have a child it will keep them. No it won’t! Sometimes a person thinks if they dumb down it will keep them. No it won’t! Sometimes a person thinks if they do things against their morals and beliefs to please him or her it will keep them. No it won’t! Sometimes people think if they are at their beckoning call it will keep them. No it won’t! Nothing you do will matter when you do not matter!

If you feel a need to buy a person’s love, then you’re in the wrong relationship! If you feel you need to forsake yourself and lose you to be with someone, you’re definitely with the wrong one. You can give the world, it will never be enough, if the person doesn’t want you.

Know your worth and value. If you de-value yourself you will be treated how you treat yourself. Who you consider your significant other may not consider you there’s. You’re treated exactly how you’ve allowed.

You Built the Devil’s Playground

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Yep!!!! Many people are going through it. There are many individuals who willfully and freely submit to the devil. They allow him into their lives one way or another. They entertain him and then think he won’t want to play. If you entertain him he will enter happily into your life. He comes in all kinds of forms.

Every individual knows their own weaknesses. Well, the devil knows them too, because most of you don’t fight; you eagerly, willfully, and freely submit to the flesh. Every time temptation comes many people fall prey of their own freewill no matter how wrong. This is not the will of God. The devil won’t or can’t flee if you keep giving him a playground to play in.

There are many people who invites the devil in then when they are beat up by the devil they want to blame God. Stop blaming God for all of the things you willfully choose to partake in. Stop giving him your power! Activate the power in you!

The devil makes things look wonderful. He glams things up for you making you think the glitter is gold when it’s simply glitter. He makes things look good to you, when they aren’t good for you. He makes things feel good to you, when they aren’t good for you. He makes you fascinated and fixated on titles, labels, statuses, money, positions, how people look, and material things, and to many people those things are highly important. Many of you idolize people making them your gods. There are also many people who idolize different things making those things their gods. They give their power to people and things, but can’t handle the let down they get from them. Afterwards they are angry and want to blame God. The true and living God isn’t pleased. There is to be “no other god before Him!”

The devil makes people think the world has everything to offer them when it has nothing to offer. If you gain the world, you lose your soul. It’s not a fair trade at all, because whatever a person gain is only temporary. When you die you can’t take ANYTHING with you! Yet, people are still trying to build their treasures up here on earth; when the Bible says not to!

People get angry at God when the bottom falls out of their lives for things they allowed in. They can’t take it when the storms rage out of control over things they willfully allowed. They are angry at God when things don’t go their way after they’ve made their bad choices and decisions.

What looks good can kill you! What feels good can kill you! What someone else has shouldn’t be why you want to be with them, because everyone should have their own security and not look to someone for it. Having your own prevents others from having power over you. Trying to love someone else when you don’t love yourself is plain immature! People know your weaknesses and will seek whom they can devour. Everything that glitters isn’t gold nor is it valuable. It could cost you everything when it has no benefit for you! Babies don’t keep marriages together, however; they are for a lifetime. Nothing you offer a person will make the person love you, they will take from you until you have nothing. Cheating says a lot about the cheater and the person going along with it. You know if a person is cheating, it’s okay for them, but if you go along with it they also know it’s ok for you and right away you’re teaching the person how to treat you! Sex is nothing new, but many risk lives and relationships to get it. Getting with someone just to say you have someone can be costly and deadly. Basing feelings on how someone looks or what they have can also be costly and deadly. All of these and many more are ways people willfully invite the in, because they are led by the flesh. They follow their immature ways of thinking, feelings, and acting. When they do they almost always end up in unhealthy relationships or they are just unhappy period!

The devil loves, loves, loves to see people giving in to him. He gets great joy out of it. He loves even more when people profess Christ yet are living other ways against Christ. He stays right in the playground provided for him. As long as you play with him, he will play with you. He’s glad about it!

You can stomp on the devil’s head. You can resist him and he will flee. I didn’t say he wouldn’t come back, but he will know you’re not one to be messed with. You have to kick him completely out and not allow him any control over you. If you give it, he will take it. The Bible says (the spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak). That means although we are flesh and bone, we don’t have to give in and allow the flesh to lead. We can resist temptation! Temptation comes in all kinds of ways, it’s up to each of us to resist it. If you submit you may as well expect anything! However, the Bible says there’s no temptation for which there’s no room to escape. It is up to each of us. Let the devil know your playground has been torn down and he no longer has anywhere to play.

Worshipping Man Disappoints You Every Time

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I was listening to someone pretty well known as a gospel singer and used to be pastor. She was ranting angrily about church folks. She was cursing and acting completely out of control. In the comments some people were saying God is speaking through her, she’s telling the truth, woman of God speak, etc while others were against the delivery. God had nothing to do with it. It’s foolish to think God would speak through ANYONE in that way. Truth is it was all her, she was speaking out of the flesh! Although she spoke truth how she did it was wrong. Cause she’s mad now she wants to talk against people and the church; when she knew from the start those people were EXACTLY the way they were. She remained a part of it until the well ran dry. Don’t blame no one but yourself. I’m always good with the truth and she told the truth, but lowered herself to tell it.

I’ve told you all many, many times just because a person says they are a pastor doesn’t mean they are of God. A person can tell their story without acting out of control and cursing, disrespecting self. Don’t get mad THEN want to blast the church, those you were doing what you were doing with, regular church goers, etc. People know the folks they are dealing with and they know many in the church aren’t remotely trying to live what they are professing. As long as it’s working it is all good; when something goes wrong you’re mad at everyone to include God.

I don’t care how upset or disappointed a person gets you never let the devil win. You shouldn’t let the devil take you back to your old self. People do it because they’ve never truly became new creatures, therefore they never came out of their old ways. Trust me if you’re faking it will come to the light. Going on Facebook live only shows the entire world who and what you truly are. It’s no surprise to me! I’ve said more than I’ve written in some of my blogs many Gospel artists sing, but don’t live what they sing. I know; I’ve lived it and seen it. I’ve written many times how people are making their pastors their masters and how the churches of today are not churches of God, they are churches of the people. Churches of the people are straight business oriented. They reach people to keep their businesses afloat, but they aren’t trying to reach souls. This is why I always say get a relationship with God for yourselves and get into the Word for yourselves.

Listen, stop believing the myth. Everyone going to the church house isn’t a Saint of God. People get upset and want to cast God aside because they are mad at church folks when most of the church folks aren’t Saints of God. People go to church out of tradition. They go because to them it’s what they are accustomed to and they think it’s the right thing to do. It’s not because they love the Lord and have a relationship with Him. They have relationships with everyone but God. They are faithful to the pastor, choir, usher board, Bible study, and tithing; ALL to please man, but no relationship with Jesus Christ! Most still do the same things they’ve always done, they haven’t changed.

Many people are angry at church folks when most in the church aren’t Saints of God. People are confusing it, they have put all people going to church in the same category. It’s wrong and unfair, because some people who are going to church are in love with Jesus. They believe He is the Son of God who died for our sins. They worship Jesus and not their pastors. They are going out of a relationship with the Father and the Son, and Holy Spirit and not to please the pastors or people. These are the true Saints of God and they aren’t the same as regular “church folks.”

With regular church folks expect anything! Their walk, talk, goings, comings, ways of thinking, feeling, and acting hasn’t changed. They are still liars, cheating, boastful, prideful, they love money and things, and doing everything against God. Sad part many are the preachers, teachers, singers, choir directors, musicians, ushers, etc. They go to church, but it’s not in their hearts. When you’re a true Saint of God you carry the church inside of you 24/7, not just on Sundays or for Bible study. You live the church, because the Father, Son, and Holy Spirit dwells in you. That is the difference between people just going and those who are Saints of God.

If you’re mad you should be mad at self. People put folks up on pedal stools, they praise and worship them, then they are mad when they are hurt and disappointed. It’s to be expected when you deal with folks who are going to the church house out of tradition. It’s to be expected when churches are ran strictly as businesses because the focus isn’t the soul for the Kingdom, the focus is the body to fill the seat. If a person is angry be angry at yourself for falling for it and going along with it trying to get what you want. Get mad at yourself for putting your pastors and your churches before God. Get mad at yourself for putting folks on pedal stools. Get mad at yourself for trying to do whatever to be a part of the click. Get mad at yourself for trying to embed yourself into the lives of people because of who the world say they are (they are known, have a title, have positions of power, etc, etc). Get mad at yourself for worshipping people, titles, positions and not worshipping God!

Jesus is exactly who He say He is; the First, the Last, the Beginning, the End, the Great I Am. He’s all of it and some. He’s not false of fake. He’s not a want to be He is the Great I Am. He’s no liar, He’s no people pleaser, He isn’t fixated on titles or statuses cause He’s the Great I am. He doesn’t have to show boat for anyone. If you get connected to Him you will understand the difference between church folks who go out of tradition and love for the people and those who go out of love for Jesus Christ. There’s no comparison! You will also know just because a person sings the gospel and may be a household name it doesn’t mean they are living what they sing. People are falling out over folks and worshipping individuals who are singing the gospel, yet the ones they worship don’t know Jesus! It’s a shame!

As long as people go with their eyes on man being led by the flesh they will continue to get the same results; disappointment! You follow what you love the most! Stop using the line people are judging and no one is perfect to stay the way you are. Stop serving the world and think you won’t get what it has to offer; disappointment! God is not mocked!

Serving the Lord Jesus Will Pay Off

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I will be the first to admit sometimes it gets tough. However, we must remember He is with us! When it’s difficult sometimes to see through the fog, He is there! He said, “He will never leave or forsake us.” I know life throws us terrible things sometimes, but that’s just it; it’s life! We will all go through the rocky roads. Think about it; if you were trying to climb a mountain and it was completely smooth with no grooves or areas to catch a grip, you would probably not be able to climb it. Those tough times are meant to build us up not tear us down!

It’s hard for some people to believe in what they can’t see. He knew we would feel this way. This is why the Bible says “for faith is the substance of things hoped for, evidence of things not see.” It is meant for us to “walk by faith and not by sight.”

If we got everything we prayed for, we would be spoiled, selfish, inconsiderate, and self absorbed people. Sadly many are this way period. Difference is they aren’t serving God or they aren’t walking by faith. They may talk it, but they aren’t walking it. As Saints of God’s we can’t simply be hearers of the Word we have to be doers as well. We have to live what we profess!

There is no comparison to the reward we’ll get for staying in the race until the end. No matter how hard it gets, we must stay prayed up and in the race. Don’t allow anything or anyone to cause you to change paths. The devil wants you to get off and stay off track. He’s sending things to you in every direction to get you sided tracked. Remember, he’s a defeated foe under your feet, if you believe it! He may have some power, but God Almighty has all power. The devil is only as strong as we allow him to be in our lives.

The Bible says “if you resist the devil he will flee.” The problem for most they give into the flesh and allow the devil to have the victory. Why give the victory to the devil when the battle has been won through Jesus Christ? Through Him we have the victory! The devil’s victory is temporary, because one day he will be cast back where he belong. Right now he’s trying to fix it where he takes as many souls with him that he can!

I know it’s really hard for some people to believe Jesus exists. He does exist! Man has from the beginning caused their own destruction by going against the Word of God. To this very day man is still doing the exact same things! God didn’t give His only begotten Son to die in vain. He had a purpose which is relevant to us all today. He paid the price for us all when He died for our sins. Yet people are still spitting in His face today.

I dare you to keep trusting Him. No matter what comes your way, keep trusting and believing in Him. You may have to cry sometimes it’s okay, stay in the race. Sometimes you may feel discouraged and want to throw in the towel; don’t do it! The devil gets in any way you allow him to. Don’t give the devil a ride, because he will want to drive. If you let him drive then he has control. Keep trusting Jesus the Son, God the Father, and the Holy Spirit. You may swerve sometimes, but don’t you dare get off the road!

There is nothing greater than someday seeing Jesus’s face. We’ve experienced His beauty and glory, but wait until we can see His face! It excites me to think about! We will someday hear Him say “well done good and faithful servant.” Nothing greater than having a seat at the welcome table in the Kingdom of God!” Man can’t offer something so precious to you. You can only get this by living for Jesus until the race is complete!

I encourage you to hold your head up even when you don’t feel you have the strength. Pray even when you feel He’s not listening. Pray when you’re going through, don’t be discouraged, instead stay encouraged and keep praying! When people around you are talking against God, you stand firmly on the Word of God. When you’ve come out of the world don’t ever feel a need to go back. Nothing is there for you other than destruction and death. Stay on the Lord’s side where you belong. What you do for the Lord will pay off afterwhile. Keep holding on in the name of Jesus!

Memories and Thoughts and the Power you Give Them

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There are millions of hurt people in this world who unfortunately hurt other people. Many people live their lives based on what others have said or done to them. They find it difficult to move forward because they are pulled backwards by their minds; which by the way have imprisoned them. No one can save you, no one can fix you, and no one can change you. The only one who can do it is you! You may have people around to influence, motivate, encourage, or inspire you to want to change, but if the willingness to change doesn’t come from you, the change will only be temporary. People who change to please others will always revert back to who they really are.

There are many people who feel they must be validated by others and because of it they are at the mercy of others. They allow other people to dictate how they feel about self. Those you give your power to know they have it and they will abuse it. People prey on who they think are weak, because the prowler him or herself are weak! They see and feel it in their prey!

Most people are accustomed to how they’ve been all their lives. It feels familiar and comfortable. Instead of trying to change they continue to live how they’ve always lived. No matter how miserable and hurt they feel they continue living their lives the same way. Many people blame others for who they are. I admit other people contribute to our lives in many ways both positive and negative. However, when you point at someone to blame them, you have three fingers pointing back at self. I think it’s a way for us to take ownership of who or what we’ve become.

Despite what a person goes through, despite how traumatic; who a person becomes as adults falls on the individual. People can choose to remain the same or they can choose better than what they came from. When people choose to remain the same they’ve seem to opt out of changing. Sometimes the people who have wronged them are dead and gone; yet people are still holding on to their experiences with the person/people through their memories. Memories are real, how strong they reign inside of a person is up to the individual.

Believe it or not none of our pasts exist today. None of them! We are all living in the present. If people do not deal with the issues of their pasts they are affected for a life time. It affects every facet of a person’s life. Not once have I said the past didn’t exist, of course it existed, but it’s not what we live in today. It is behind us and only the memories of it remains. Unfortunately for many people those memories are very real and strong. People are trapped by their own minds, because they’ve given power to the memories of their pasts. They carry these residual affects throughout their lives. It shapes them into what they’ve become. It’s a cycle most past down through generations until someone breaks the chain.

Many people walk around smiling, yet they are broken and hurting inside. Pretending will never give a person the understanding or will to deal with what’s causing them pain and suffering. People must learn to face it in order to move on. Those who do can go on to lead productive lives. However, those who don’t will live their lives as a revolving door. They will go in and out the same type relationships with the same types of people and wonder why. They will make the same bad decisions and choices and wonder why. They will allow people to take advantage or misuse them and wonder why it’s happening. They will continue to be unhappy which oftentimes lead to other things such as depression and even worse things like suicidal or homicidal thoughts, etc. Not all people will go through those thoughts, feelings, or emotions, but some will, because they don’t understand most times our biggest enemy is self. The power of the mind is beyond belief, but our thoughts and memories are only as powerful as we make them.

Things will happen to us, but how we deal with those things depends on how we receive them, perceive them, and the power we give to those things. We are our own greatest enemy, because we give so much power to negative memories of our pasts which has led to negative ways of thinking, period! The past doesn’t cause people any further pain, people do it to themselves by not dealing with the issues of their pasts. Instead they focus on the memories as if they are present today. It’s like a wound, if you constantly dig in a wound it won’t heal properly and because of the constant manipulation of it, the person could cause other issues. This is how many live their lives. They keep going back to the memories of their pasts. They are trapped by their own minds.

Today is a brand new day given to each of us. We can choose to become better or we can choose to stay the same. None of us will forget what we’ve gone through, but none of us have to be prisoners to our own minds, causing the inability to move forward. We don’t have to give our power to anything or anyone!

Live your life for you first! If you’re not healthy and whole you’re really not any good for anyone else. Sadly many go through life with all of their issues while trying to love others when they first don’t love self. This is proven every single day by people who constantly are in and out of unhealthy relationships or people having children and messing them up from the gate. Those are only two examples out of many.

Learning to become better has to be something a person wants. It starts with the individual. You’re not what or who someone else says you are unless you believe it yourself. No one should ever accept negativity from anyone else. You have the power to be whatever you choose to be. Never settle and think you should be a certain way because of what someone else said or did. They don’t get to choose, you do!