Your Thoughts Can Be Detrimental


Many people are doing the unthinkable. I hate looking at the news because it is always showing nonsense. It’s always showing terrible things happening. Things never simply happen, things are done by a lot of lost and broken people. People who get to points of no return. People who get to this point are people who have premeditated their actions. They are people who took a lot of time to think about what they were going to do, before they did it.

This post isn’t just about people who do the unthinkable. It’s about people who allow the unthinkable to be done to them. It’s about people who make bad choices and decisions in their daily lives causing dysfunction and chaos wherever they go. It’s about people who are blind to their feelings and emotions. It’s about individuals who allow people and things to control them. I can go on and on. However, I hope you get the point!

I’ve stated many times how devastating and damaging it can be when people give power to their thoughts, things, or other people. Anything you give power to you can control you. The more power you give to thoughts you develop feelings behind the thoughts. The feelings will either be good or bad. When you hold negative thoughts then you will have negative feelings. The more power you give to those negative thoughts they put you in terribly negative mindsets.

Power you give to your thoughts can potentially control you giving intensity to your feelings, and your actions. People are brainwashed by others because they give power to others to control them. People are controlled by things because they give power to things to control them. People do this because they are led by their feelings and in fact are blind to the truth. They want and desire to receive something regardless of what the something is. Most of how people think, act, and feel comes from what’s inside of the core (what they lacked, how they were treated, who did it, etc).

When a person is lonely, hurt, angry, isolated, ostracized, rejected, etc they give power to their thoughts. Often those thoughts are of harming self or harming others. Sometimes people are angry due to rejection or unresolved past issues. They long to be a part of a group or to be with someone but when it fails they seek another group or someone else who WILL accept them. Unfortunately oftentimes these groups or people they become a part of are bad. They coerce the individual to do the unthinkable such as harm self, others, or both. This is the act of a person who is led by their negative thoughts and feelings. This is a person who give their power to their thoughts and other people to do the unthinkable. People play on the emotions of others. If they find the individual is at a low point they will swoop in and attack their prey with fake friendship, coercion, manipulation, lies, false promises, and deceit.

When a person haven’t dealt with their issues they are led by their thoughts and feelings. The more angry they are concerning those thoughts, the more power they will hold. When they continue to think on those thoughts it intensifies feelings which leads to actions of some sorts.

When it comes to relationships the feelings people have behind thoughts don’t necessarily have to be negative or about hurting or harming self or others. Those thoughts still lead them into negative situations due to their mindsets. Their feelings make them want whatever or whoever they want at any and all cost. People have found themselves in bad relationships because of how they feel. Thoughts fuels feelings. Some of the relationships have deadly consequences. Sometimes people find they are so unhappy in their relationships they become angry, full of resentment, anxiety, depression, some become suicidal or even homicidal. It’s because they’re unhappy people who land themselves in unhappy and unhealthy relationships.

The mind is powerful because of the thoughts it holds and the power people give to those thoughts. Thoughts leads to feelings. Feelings causes actions whether good or bad in any given situation. Individuals have the power to do the right thing, yet many of them give it away to things and people. They choose their feelings and emotions over doing the right thing. Negative states of minds is what most gravitate towards. Negativity is what they’ve become accustomed to. Many people continue down wrong and negative roads. There are always consequences!

Loving Yourself Starts With You


There are people who find it very difficult being alone. They don’t want to be alone out of fear and insecurities of some sorts. At least it is what some people tell themselves. The truth is when a person don’t love his or herself they are normally seeking companionship with someone or some other people. These individuals oftentimes always feel a need to be around others. They are the types of people who relationship hop. As soon as one relationship is over they’re right into another one.

Another extreme is when individuals are in relationships they cling on to others. They are overbearing and make it miserable for those in relationships with them. They either find it difficult to trust or they trust too much. They are always seeking something in others they don’t possess in self.

The biggest problem in this situation is the lack of self love, which comes from the core. The root of what is causing a person the inability to love his or herself causes much drama in their lives. Instead of people learning to deal with their issues they keep trucking through life doing the same things the very same way. When a person work through their issues of dysfunction they can become stronger individuals who progress and mature mentally.

Sadly many people get older, but they’re still immature. When people don’t deal with their issues it keeps them in the same places in life. Loving self is the greatest form of self development a person can obtain.

In life there will always be those who aren’t in your corner. It’s hard for people to love and support others when they are riddled with their own issues. People are free to feel how they choose. How you allow it to affect you is another story. When people don’t love self they allow what others say and do to greatly affect them emotionally, mentally, and physically. When you show your weakness or vulnerability to others it’s fuel for others to use against you. Some people are always preying on others. Don’t make yourselves easy prey.

People with a lot of issues are always seeking validation and approval from others. They don’t understand their worth and they don’t deal with rejection well. It’s important to them to be wanted and oftentimes they will do anything to please others especially their significant others. They seek what they lack in others. They end up with the wrong people and in unhappy situations.

Learning to love self starts with you, the individual. No one can love you enough to make you love yourself. It all falls on you, the individual. No matter what you’ve gone through, no matter who hurt you, no matter how much you endured, or how long you went through it; you are worthy of better. It starts by forgiveness, self love, and letting go. Too many people keep the pain going by holding on to it and in the process becoming mean, hateful, bitter, revengeful, angry, envious, jealous, etc. When you’re stuck because of your issues you’re giving power to others. When you continue to re-live your pain you’re giving power to others. When you can’t love yourself due to what you’ve gone through you’re giving power to others to control how you think, feel, and act.

We only get one life to live. People can choose the same roads they’ve been on all their lives or they can choose better paths. It’s completely up to the individual what they choose. Sadly many stay on the same road with the same types of people doing the same types of things. People who choose to not change will always remain the same.

How Insecurities Affect Relationships


There are many people in relationships who are causing chaos for self, significant others, and others in general. People are already getting into wrong relationships, on top of it they are carrying all of their baggage
along with them.

When individuals have their own issues all they know is dysfunction; carrying it into relationships with other people. Due to their unresolved issues their insecurities are projected onto others. They are quick to blame their relationships issues on their significant others. They often complain and see fault in everyone except self.

Insecurities are difficult to deal with in any relationship. No matter how much you care for someone it takes a lot from you when dealing with your issues and those of another person. Insecurities either keep a person relationship hopping or stuck in relationships they don’t want to be in with people they don’t really want to be with.

Insecure people are hard to deal with period! No matter what; they will always cause friction wherever they are. They have serious trust issues. They love in dysfunctional ways. They don’t actually know what true love looks or feels like. They don’t truly love self even though they honestly think they do. People who willfully allow repeated chaos into their lives don’t love self. The last thing a person who loves self wants or will allow is chaos and dysfunction. People who don’t love self are always looking for love never really finding it. In their relationships when things go wrong they blame everyone else. They never think they are the problem.

Although some women are; most times it’s the insecure men who are controlling, obsessive, and possessive without even realizing it. Sometimes they are also abusive. They think they are confident and strong when in reality they are’t. They are crippled by their insecurities.

They are the same way on jobs and in other relationships (family, friends, etc). They have a hard time fitting in because they are critical towards others. They are always blaming others versus looking at self. It’s hard for them to see other’s points of view.

Many people who are insecure lack self confidence. They normally are insecure concerning finances especially men who significant others make more money. They have issues with self esteem, looks and body images of self or others, their sexuality and sexuality of others, being good enough, thoughts of someone leaving them, they don’t fit into the group, failing at something, acceptance of others and accepting other people because they always seeing the flaws of others. They suffer with many other insecurities as well. It makes it intolerable to be in relationships with them or sometimes around them.

People aren’t this way for no reason. Many people choose not to deal with their issues. They live the same way for so long and despite how dysfunctional, it’s normal to them. They complain and blame, but never do anything to change their situations or who they are. They only see the flaws of others. This is the reason they are in and out of the same types of relationships, with the same types of people, dealing with the same types of problems. Why? It’s because they are their own problems!

No matter what a person does or where they go, they can never get away from self. The dysfunction always follows! Until people deal with their core issues causing them to be the way they are they will continue to repeat the same cycles in life.

Holiday Blues, No It’s Your Mindset


We are approaching the holidays and unfortunately this time of year people get in their feelings. Some people are more sad and depressed than normal. I will always believe people give too much power to individuals and things to cause them to feel powerless. People will do to you only what you’ve allowed. The holidays only last for a short period. However, during the holidays some people make detrimental decisions and choices for which they can’t undo.

The holidays are coming each and every year. It’s truly not about the holidays; it’s the mindsets of people. During the holidays things feel more profound because people go deeper inward. Many people are hurting due to the many things they’ve gone through. When issues aren’t dealt with, those issues are carried for a lifetime. People allow all of their feelings and emotions to keep them in unhappy places. During the holidays people become much more sad, depressed, and unhappy.

Sadly during the holidays many people have chosen to commit suicide. They get to a point of depression where they feel there’s no room to escape. It is the mindsets of people. Many individuals feel things are not going to get better. They won’t get better if that is what they believe. The more power you give to your negative thoughts the more they consume and control you. Unfortunately it causes many people to be overcome by darkness.

If you feel powerless, out of control, not loved, etc. This is the power you’ve given to your thoughts. It’s what you believe about yourself and about your life. Of course things are never as bad as people think, but because people can’t see beyond their feelings, they often end up mentally in very dark places. People who feel this way take in everything as negative, not understanding they are their own problem. It’s not anyone else or anything, it’s you, the individual because you’ve allowed yourself to be overwhelmed and overcome by your negative thoughts.

Things look dark when people give all power and control to people and things. When individual’s live for others they give power to others. This way of thinking and feeling leaves individuals powerless. Individual’s who haven’t already dealt with their own issues always see more negativity than positive. They hold on to negative thoughts and feeling concerning situations they’ve gone through, concerning people, and things. The more things are held in the more people have a tendency to think about them. This leads to deeper immersion into darkness, unhappiness, sadness, and depression. If people don’t get a grip they are overtaken by their negative thoughts.

When people learn to love self they don’t give their power to anyone or anything. Life will happen to us all, there’s no way around it. Unfortunately
far too may individuals are stuck and are in bondage due to their negative ways of thinking about self. They continue to hold to negative mindsets causing them to remain trapped in turmoil and in a world wind of dysfunction.

During the holidays many people are alone and because of it they get caught up in their modes of loneliness. This makes them more depressed and sad. Being alone is not a bad thing! Unfortunately when individuals love self less, they give power to others. They have a need to be around individuals. If no one’s there, it makes them more sad. Individuals have lost loved ones on previous holidays, they’ve had breakups and/or separations throughout the year. People who love others greater than self lose the ability to focus and live on their own when people die, walk away, or break up occurs.

People’s problems doesn’t only surround other individuals, sometimes it’s things such as loss of jobs, loss of homes, loss of material things, etc. Despite what it is or who it may involve; things only affect you according to the degree for which you allow. Life happens to us and it will always happen to us. Oftentimes people bring things on self which makes the impact greater. Regardless of what; how you allow things to affect you dictates how you will go through your experiences. If your mindsets are negative then there’s always negative thoughts, feelings, and actions to follow. This leads to disruption, dysfunction, and oftentimes destruction.

Holidays come and they go. People’s issues go way beyond the holiday’s and are in fact unresolved and compiled issues they carry with them every day. They make the holidays another reason for their unhappiness when in truth it isn’t. You have to hold happiness within self. If you don’t feel you can be happy, then you won’t be happy due to your own mindsets. It starts with you! Take a look at yourself, if you’re still thinking, feeling, and acting the same way. It’s time for a change. Don’t do what you’ve always done, look at things differently. Make up your mind to be better and stop giving your power to others or to things to make you powerless. Only you have the ability to change self. If you give power to others or things you inhibit your ability to be better. You’re worthy of better, but you have to believe it!

Lean and Depending on Jesus


Hey, I wanted to try something quite different from my normal posts.

I’ve started podcasting and I want to share an episode with you. When I first started it was very difficult talking with no one to talk back. Yes, as much as I love to talk I found it difficult to do so. Once I started I didn’t like the sound of my voice, it has changed tremendously over the years. Then I thought, it’s yours, “go for it!” It’s me good or bad (me and my flaws).

I added a short song only a couple of minutes or less long, bear with me. I am a songwriter and I love to sing. I never said I had the greatest voice, but it doesn’t keep me from singing. Please take a listen and I hope you enjoy this new type of post. I am singing lead and doing all background vocals in my little studio. I don’t play an instrument well enough to add to my vocals. It is what it is. The vocal post is right after the commercial (which by the way I didn’t know was there).

Through all of your experiences trust Jesus, lean and depend on Him. 5 “Trust in the Lord with all thine heart, and lean not unto thine own understanding. 6 In all of your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path.” Proverbs 3: 5-6

Doing What is Right


Doing the right thing because it’s the right thing to do. People know right from wrong, many just choose wrong. They will follow wrong no matter what. This is the sign something within these types of individuals is not right. People have many unresolved issues which has caused them to be who they are. Many learnt behaviors can be unlearned if people choose to change.

Many of my posts talks about the core, which is what lies within. What’s in is always coming out. Although people try to hide the truth it is always shown in some form. People hold on to negativity allowing it to hinder their progress versus trying to hold on to positive. They will pick the bad out of something good, because it’s what they see. It causes people to make mad choices and decisions in life. They are stay stuck in their negative ways of thinking.

Some people don’t care! The negative core within keeps them stuck in negative mental states of mind. Their views are distorted, therefore they gravitate towards wrong accepting it as right. They are quick to follow people who have like mental states. When a person chooses to follow wrong they are liable to fall for anything. It’s a very sad state of mind many have. We see it played out every day in the lives of many.

People can’t see the truth because they lack the ability to see it. The truth is obscured! Most of these types of people will defend wrong doings of others at all costs. One reason is they feel connected in some way. They have a sense of wanting to belong and because of it they will accept anything and everything, regardless of how ridiculous it may be.

Most people follow individuals who are famous or those who are at least known in some way. They accept anything they say or do. What people fail to realize is status, title, money, nor anything else makes a person exempt from core issues. Many of these people are also broken and have issues which also keeps them stuck even though they are successful or known. It shows in their actions, decisions, and choices. Although the dysfunction is evident it’s overlooked because people only see what they want.

The behavior is the same towards individuals who aren’t famous or known. People will follow who they choose to follow in order to feel relevant. They will get caught up in bad situations with bad people because they want to belong. They will get into situations with people who aren’t making good choices or decisions. They are easily coerced and persuaded. It all goes back to the issues held within the core. People have to choose to deal with what causes them stagnation and dysfunction. Until people take notice and accept they need to change, they won’t! When they don’t they will continue to find themselves in dysfunctional situations and relationships with others.

Until people literally face who stares back at them in the mirror they will not be able to move into better states of minds. They will continue to get older yet stay stuck in immature mindsets. They will continue to follow like minds. When the mindset doesn’t change neither will ways of thinking, feeling, or acting.

Trying to Keep a Non-Keeper


All you will do is cause yourselves unnecessary heartaches and headaches. Too many people think they have something more special than the next. They think what hey have is so great it will keep who they want to be with. Nothing will keep a person who doesn’t want to be kept. Many people think because they are very into who they are with who they’re with are just as into them. Not always the truth. Matter of fact oftentimes it’s not true!

People miss the truth because they only see what they want. When a person is caught up in their feelings the signs are normally missed. They believe because they love who they are with and does things for him or her it will be enough to keep them. Not true!

Many people try hard to please who they are with. Sometimes it means putting up with foolishness. Some people subject themselves to ridiculous things thinking it will keep their significant other with them. Nothing keeps a person other than the person wanting to be kept. While you’re thinking it’s about you they are showing you it’s about them.

You can’t buy love, cook well enough, have good enough sex, provide enough, say enough, do enough, or anything else to make a person stay. If they are cheaters they will do what they do. No one can take him or her from you unless they want to go. Whatever’s in their heart is exactly what they will follow! Why? It’s because although they are in a relationship with you they aren’t committed to you, because it’s not about you. It’s about what they want and desire.

A lot of people get bend out of shape, sad, and depressed over a person who doesn’t want to do right! It makes no sense! If they do you wrong the first time shame on them, but if you keep allowing it to happen shame on you. As I’ve always said a person treats you only as you allow. If you don’t care enough about yourself to require better neither will they!

Many people are very blind to the truth. They only see what they want to see, because they want what they want. Some people do anything to keep who they are with when nothing works when a person doesn’t want to be kept! You will find yourselves in relationships yet alone, sad, and unhappy. People do this to self. Their eyes are open yet they’re blind by their feelings.

If who you are with can’t be faithful it’s because they’re an unfaithful person. You can’t change him or her. They have to want change and that’s the only way change will occur. If they aren’t ready to do so they won’t! You can give limitlessly, it will not keep a non- keeper!