Sex Offenders Have Faces Like Yours and Mine

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I know I recently wrote a post on sexual predators, but due to the fact I’ve heard a lot of it in the news this very week, I wanted to write another post on it. People have the tendency to shy away from subjects such as this. Go ahead and do whatever you please, but this is a very real problem in our world today. I am going to talk and write about it. Our children should be, must be, have to be protected. Child molesters/predators/offenders/rapist/ etc they look like you and I. It’s scary!

First of all let me make it known not everyone who is labeled a sex offender is one. People lie, that’s a fact! However, fact remains any adult who decides to have sex with a minor is WRONG. I don’t care if the minor looks like an adult in every way, they are NOT adults! Now that is out of the way, let me proceed.

I’ve had the opportunity to sit across from many sexual predators. So far I can say everyone of them had a story of once being victims. Remember the saying “hurt people hurt people?” Not all do, but many has in some form or another. It is NO EXCUSE! I have absolutely no sympathy for a person committing any form of sex act towards a child.

Babies are being raped. Babies! I’m talking infants. This is sick!!!! I just saw this week where 2 males raped a 9 month old. They don’t need any time wasting tax payers dollars. They need to be put in cages without a key. Toddlers and teenagers are being raped, molested, and acts of incest committed against them. This is sad! A man or woman who does this do not deserve to see the light of day, ever! There is no excuse for it, none!! I don’t care if they were once a victim. It should be reason enough you would never want to hurt someone else. However, many have, and many will continue to do so.

To be straight up honest, there seems to be a commodity for rape and molestation of infants and young children. Many people in this world are sick, sick, sick! If a person took the time to devise a plan to victimize, they had time to think about NOT doing it! They always, always try to manipulate a way to be around who they want to victimize. If you have the sense to think to commit such an act, you have time to think about not doing it.

Sex offenders/sexual predators are everywhere. They are in every position, status, etc. Some are rich and famous. It doesn’t matter the color of the skin, the position, the status, etc what’s in a person is coming out.

I’ve seen General’s in the Army caught up in child porn triangles. People of all calibers and walks of life are caught up in child porn. They prey on the innocent helpless little ones who can’t defend themselves.

Those who are into Satanism thinks preying on infants and children is great way to become powerful. They do rituals where they sacrifice little ones either through eating or sexual contact. It’s crazy, but research it for yourself. Their mindsets and agendas are different than the normal sexual predator, although they are still are sexual predators.

Please protect the children. People living amongst you are preying on your children. Make your life about your children until they are able to protect themselves. Don’t think someone won’t do it, because of who they are, sometimes they are the mains one who will do it.

Children are afraid to tell for many reasons. Guess what? They are children and it’s understandable, but remember you must develop a relationship with your child that enables them the courage to tell you what’s really going on. Many children grow into adults who are affected by their pasts because they never dealt with what they’ve gone through. Many grow into adults with very negative attitudes and maladaptive behaviors.

Our world is filled with people who are affected by their pasts because they never developed appropriately during their stages of development. They remained stuck in whatever stage they were affected and although they got older they still kept the same mindset. This destroys many lives. If people don’t heal from their past issues it will be reflected in how they live their lives. It will show in their decisions and choices they make throughout their lifetime.

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Choosing Man’s Way Over God’s Way

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Many people of the world today have chosen man’s way over thus sayeth the Lord. Everything God says is the right way, man is saying it’s the wrong way. Everything God says is the wrong way, man is saying it’s the right way. What’s even sadder is people don’t fear or respect God. They are boldly doing what they want to do! This world has adopted the “Burger King” concept of “have it your way.” There will be repercussions and consequences for all things against the Son and the Father!

Jesus died for our sins, so we don’t have to die for them. God could have easily brought him down from the cross. He stayed there for you, you, you, and I. Yet, this world is right back in the same predicament of the Bible days. People are doing whatever, whenever, and wherever. They have no shame about anything they do or say! To put icing on the cake, many of these people profess Christ as their Lord and Savior! Lies, lies, lies and people who do this know they are telling lies, lies, lies! I’m not trying to spiritually shame anyone, I’m trying to help you realize you need to get it right before it’s too late!

Time is moving right along, it waits for no man. However the most beautiful thing is even though time is moving quickly, everyday we get to see is a day given for us to change our ways and come to the Lord. It is time given to stop mocking God and playing church. People mock God and play church to please man. They go to church out of tradition, but also out of dedication to man, yet they have no commitment or dedication to Jesus. No one can know the Father if they have no relationship with the Son!

Many people don’t want to give up this world; they think they’ll miss something if they do. They are very correct, they will miss something detrimental to them, which is Heaven trying to live for this world! Many people have and are falling away, because they have no roots. Many people want to straddle a fence that doesn’t exist.

I don’t care who YOU think you are or what pedal stool you’ve been put on. All of our knees will someday bow. No one is above the Master! We will all give an account of what we’ve done against God. There are only 2 roads to take; the right one or the wrong one. Many willfully choose the wrong road, because they don’t want to give up the wrong for the right. They don’t want to let go of things of this world.

You can’t take with you your old ways on a new journey with the Lord, you have to put them down. You must let them completely go and not turn back to pick them up. If a person truly wants to serve God they can and they will give up this world. To love Him, you must live for Him, period! Those who don’t want to give up their old ways are the first ones to say you’re judging them. They are the first ones who will say no one is perfect. These are old, old, excuses to stay where you are in the world.

I will not tell you a lie, not one time have I desired to go back to my old ways. When I came up out of my mess, I was thankful how God kept me safe from all dangers seen and unseen, natural and supernatural. I went through some stuff, but He kept me. It could have been me many times, but yet He kept me. I wouldn’t turn back for nothing or no one! God has been too good to me! When I was in the world I thought I was having fun, I did what I wanted to do. However, when I developed my relationship with Jesus, I realized all the things I had done against Him. It made me weep, I still weep when I think about where He brought me from! I can’t turn back, nothing is back there for me. I know for a fact 100% people can live Holy lives if they choose.

The devil has his agenda and has had it from the start. He makes things appealing to the eyes, he tickles the ears, he gives people this and that and sadly some think what the devil gave them is from the Lord, and he makes things glitter to look like gold when it isn’t. He is doing his job of lying and deceiving people. He pulls all types of arsenals out of his bag of tricks to make people think the world is a better option. Nothing a person gains in this world has value in Heaven or hell. We will take nothing with us when we leave this world. How we chose to live determines our eternal home. Yet, people are still choosing this world as if they will be here forever. No, we all will someday depart this world! People must get ready for this transition. We all have a chance right now to get it right while the blood is running warm through our veins.

Signs Are Ignored, But Still Exist

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It’s a shame the situations we willfully put ourselves in. I am including myself, because once upon a time I did it too, but thank God I learnt better and now do better. I’ve learned from every situation (good and the bad) in my life. It taught me what to accept and what not to accept. I clearly see pass feelings and emotions. It’s takes loving self and growth to get to such a point. When a person wants to change they will do it!

I keep reminding myself maturity doesn’t necessarily come with age. People make many bad decisions based on the state of mind they’re in. It’s all related to what is the true you! You can hide it from others, but never from yourself. People can present themselves as one thing and by the way, most do. However, if you want to know the truth simply watch and the truth will present itself in some form or another. It is always seen through a person’s decisions, choices, and ultimately their actions.

You all know I’ve written countless times “we teach others how to treat us and you will always be treated how you’ve allowed.” That is fact! If you choose to get into a relationship with someone who is constantly giving you drama, drama is what you will get. If you get into a relationship in the wrong way, with the wrong person, for the wrong reason, drama is what you will get. Trust and believe drama is on the way!

To break it down further. If a person don’t love self they are bound to be led by their feelings. If a person is carrying a lifetime of old baggage, they are bound to be led by their feelings and emotions. If a person gets with someone who is already with someone, it’s because of inside issues. To be with someone and do things you are uncomfortable with and wouldn’t normally do it’s due to what’s inside. If you allow yourself to be abused, mistreated, or disrespected, it’s because of what’s inside. I can go on and on. The point I am trying to relay is, people treat you how you allow. People allow this because they too are carrying their own baggage they need to deal with. Theirs is affecting them and yours affecting you. Now what do you think it will be? Chaos and drama, yet people will swear it’s love, when love hasn’t a thing to do with it.

People show you who they really are, sadly individuals fail to believe it. Signs are missed due to feeling and emotions. It all comes from negative states of mind people are trapped in and have become comfortable with. People find it difficult to see past their emotions and feelings until they find themselves drowning in a sea of chaos they willfully subjected themselves to. I know it’s a hard pill for many to swallow, yet it is still the truth! No one can change you or your situation other than you!

So many individuals get into relationships thinking they can change the other person. If they can’t change them they think they can save or fix them. You can’t save, fix, or change anyone; this includes your children, significant others, friends, family, or other people. One thing for certain is you can lose your peace, health, and strength in trying. It will leave you drained in more ways than one.

Stop loving people to death! They live and be who they choose to be while some of you die! I mean literally (stress, depression, suicide, etc) and if you don’t literally die you’re dead spiritually. You lose yourselves in trying to fix, save, or change other people. It’s nonsense! Know your worth and lay down boundaries and standards. You must first love you! When you love yourself you won’t allow anyone to bring unnecessary drama into your space/life!

There are a lot of people who get involved with individuals they swear they love and these individuals introduces them to drugs and alcohol. People are introduced to the streets, sexual immorality, and all kind of God forsaken things! Listen if you’re with someone who is introducing you to things which could devastate your life, you’re with the wrong person! Use common sense! No significant other is worth pain and drama in your life. Pain and drama goes hand in hand! Love has NOTHING at all to do with it. Getting involved with people who are bringing chaos in your life says a lot about you! It tells you something in your life needs fixing! To ignore it only adds to your internal issues. You’re trying to fix someone when you haven’t dealt with your own issues, now you’re dealing with those of the person you’re with as well. This is unnecessary stress and drama!

There are always signs! People don’t change into someone you don’t want to be with, they were already that way, but the signs were ignored, because you couldn’t see past your feelings and emotions. When things get unbearable, then and only then can people see the real deal; which was there all along! Unfortunately some people refuse to ever see the truth, because they can’t get past their feelings due to their states of mind. They make things solely about what they want and desire based on their feelings. They ignore the truth!

Sexual Predators Are From All Walks of Life

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This is long, but I feel it needs to be written. It saddens my heart how people want to tip toe around this subject. Many people don’t want to address this subject. I will!! I know a lot of people won’t like it, that’s okay too! I’m tired of hearing about these terrible acts committed on children. People need to be accountable and they need to deal with their demons.

We all come in this world as babies who develop into adults and if we live; on into old age. Our upbringings differ, yet many will and have dealt with similar issues. If a person doesn’t deal with the things affecting them those things will follow and affect them throughout the rest of their lives. People can choose to change or remain the same. I know things can affect us which can be life altering; however, it doesn’t mean we have to turn into negative people! For those who’ve dealt with sexual abuse it doesn’t give ANYONE a free ticket to victimize others. No matter what; what we choose to become is a personal choice! Not every person who sexually victimize others were victims of sexual abuse. I believe most have been, but not all. Some people commit the act due to other negative things they’ve encountered when they were young causing them to adopt the negative behaviors.

We are supposed to protect our children, but the fact of the matter many parents fail to. Some parents do it intentionally, while some don’t. What I mean is this. There are many parents who allow terrible things to happen to their children, because of the people they are in relationships with. They are led by their feelings and emotions and because of it, are blind to reality. They put their children in harms way. Some children are molested, raped, physically abused, emotionally abused, verbally abused, and even killed, because parents are more concerned about self gratification then for their children who depend on them. Some of these parents sell their children, they allow all types of abuse, they themselves partake in acts against their children. They do it, because they are in what they think is love and they think it’s more important than the welfare and wellbeing of their children! They’ll do anything to be with the person they think they love, even if it means causing harm to their children. These people (the perps and the parent/s) are individuals who have baggage they’ve lugged around for a lifetime. They’ve allowed it to affect many facets of their lives.

Parents who unintentionally fail their children are those who send their kids unknowingly into the hands of predators. They are parents who don’t suspect others to do something so vile. Let me tell you, it can be ANYONE! Friends do it, friends of the family do it, family members do it (sisters, brothers, cousins, uncles, aunts, grandparents), parents do it, teachers, preachers, police officers, doctors, nurses, politicians, celebrities, NO ONE is exempt etc. They come from all walks of life!

Parents please talk to your children and educate them on this topic. Let your children feel comfortable with talking and let them know it’s okay to tell. Let them know the tricks people can subtly play to groom them (playfully playing around and touching them in places they shouldn’t acting as if it’s a game, doing nice things for them, setting them up where they can be alone with them acting as if they are looking out for them, making them think they’re friends, etc). Let them know the things people will tell them to keep them quiet (verbal threats to blame them, threats of harm to them or someone else, they will tell them things to twist it and make it seems as if the child will be in trouble, telling them no one will believe the child, telling them it’s their special secret and for them not to tell anyone, making the child believe they will be taken from their parents, etc). Let them know they should ALWAYS tell, no matter what the person says and no matter who the person is! Let them know it is NOT their fault!

Parents must open their eyes! Stop ignoring signs pretending they don’t exist. It does nothing to protect your children. Stop making children feel they are to blame. Stop doubting your child because of who they are accusing. It does nothing to help your children. It causes trust issues in your child; making them feel unsafe and unprotected. It makes them afraid to talk/tell. Any inappropriate behavior is dead wrong and should never ever be tolerated!

Women need to be careful the interaction between their children and whomever they are with. A lot of what’s going on is inappropriate. Stop leaving your children with those nasty men who cause them harm. Stop pretending you don’t see it! There are always signs! Predators are manipulative, cunning, and they do things in subtle ways to gain the trust of their intended victims. The whole while they are grooming them to get what they want. Most times people don’t suspect them because they are good at manipulation. They can be very believable! It’s a trick of manipulation, lies, and deception. They blend in and they do what they have to in order to get what they want and it’s premediated! It is something they’ve mulled over many times.

Our world is filled with broken souls, because of neglect, lack of nurturing, lack of love, lack of protection, lack of parenting, physical-sexual-emotional abuse, etc. etc. It happens in their homes or homes of friends or family, in relationships, in church, in schools, at the doctors, and many other places. People commit these crimes because at some point many were victims of sexual abuse. Still, it’s NO excuse to continue this terrible vicious cycle. It’s the last thing a person should do, yet many will victimize.

Talk to your children and ask questions. I don’t care who the other person/people are; ask questions! Stop thinking certain people are okay. Just because you love a person doesn’t mean they mean you or your children any good. A lot of times men want to get to women to get to their children. Women have to open their eyes to this truth! I’m sure some women do the same.

I’m not saying all men are this way, but some are. It’s pretty clear; if women will accept the truth as it presents itself. Instead many will downplay things and some will even blame the child. Women who do this have obvious issues and because they fail to acknowledge and face those issues, it leads to a lifetime of problems for them, spilling into the lives of their children.

Never love someone to the point of ignoring what is happening to your child. Never love someone to the point your child’s safety and welfare are neglected. Never love someone to the point you’re upset with your child over the inappropriate actions of a grown person. Never love the thought of being in love to a point you’re not being a parent to your child. Stop making it all about you and what you want. You should be the protector of your child!

Some people get on social media and meet people who end up being abusive to them and their children. Some have criminal histories involving sex offenses, yet some women allow them into their lives. Some have histories of physical abuse, yet some women will still allow them into their lives. No one all of a sudden changes into a monster, they were already that way! People choose to ignore the truth! Unfortunately many children have died because of it and many are abused in all types of ways.

Any adult male or female who touches a child inappropriately or have thoughts of it are completely sick minded. It’s even worst when the perpetrator is the parent. It happens a lot in families, the cycle keeps going. It’s sad!! There are too many men and women giving it away for free for individuals to touch babies and underage children. More than likely people who offend were sexually abused in some form as a child. Instead of dealing with it and healing from it many people continue the cycle of abuse. Although once victims these very people now choose to victimize. These perps do to children the very things done to them. It’s a sad disgusting shame!! I sympathize with anyone who was sexually abused but it is NOT a reason to do it to someone else. It’s an excuse, one that doesn’t work!

Sexual predators comes in all forms. They are of all races, genders, ages, populations, cultures, etc. They are from all calibers of life from what society deems as the highest status on down to the lowest. Many have lots of money and others don’t. Some have power, status, titles and others don’t. They are embedded in EVERY professional position existing on this earth! Sad, isn’t it? Yes it is, but it’s the truth! They will get into situations and positions where they know they will have access to the children they want to victimize. They do it intentionally. They wiggle their nasty ways into the lives of children until they are comfortable enough to do to them what they intend to do. It is premeditated!

It’s sad to say, but people have to be careful about putting their children’s pictures on social media. I have seen pictures that are borderline inappropriate which is something predators love to see. There are a lot of sick individuals who solicit pictures of infants and young children. It is the sick minded people in the world today. They make it unsafe for our children. Predators are on the prowl twenty four hours a day, everyday! Be careful. Also, know what your children are doing on the internet and who they are engaging with! Please stop putting pictures out there for these predators to see. Many of these people will get with you, to get next to your children. It is a fact! I have sat across from both perps and victims the stories are the same or similar, but it’s just different faces telling the stories. People need help with their demons. If they don’t face them, they give power to them!

Society says sexual predators can’t be reformed. Personally I don’t believe it. This is why I’ve worked with both. These people need help as well as the victims. I believe ANY person can stop doing ANYTHING if they choose to. It is up to the individual. People aren’t born that way, they learn to be that way. Anything learned can be unlearned. The more people submerge themselves into negative thoughts the more power they give to those thoughts. Thoughts causes the feelings, which influences the actions. These types of people know when their thoughts, feelings, and actions are wrong, yet they still follow through with them. They lie and connive their ways into the lives of the children. They do it for so long they get comfortable with what they have become(a monster)!

Lastly, sexual predators don’t always only abuse children they also try it on grown men and women. There’s nothing in this world worth a person allowing his or herself to be abused to obtain ANYTHING (money, promotion, status, title, material things, etc). Remember, YOU teach people how to treat you and they will treat you exactly how you allow (this is strictly pertaining to grown folks). I don’t care who the perpetrator is or their position! If someone is inappropriate don’t go along with it and don’t keep your mouth shut about it. Nip it in the bud asap! If you don’t you’re letting a sexual predator continue their cycle of abuse; which means the next time a child could be the target.

If He Saved You, No one can Take It Away

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There has been controversy about once saved always saved. Personally I believe we are. Only Jesus saves! Romans 10:9 tells us what we must do to be saved. Once we make the vow we are saved. What man has authority to take from you what God has given you? Not one!

I firmly believe people backslide back into the world, but in their hearts they know the way. They turn from Jesus, but the seed has already been planted. When we become saved, we accept the seed planted into us. It is like we are birth from the womb into salvation. No man can take our being saved away, because no man had the power or authority to give us salvation.

I believe this is why the Bible says “train up a child in the way he should go and when he is old he will not depart from it.” When we give ourselves to Christ it is the beginning of a life time journey. However, for most to include myself we receive salvation, but then we turn to the world. I got saved at 12. What did I know, nothing? I was well into my late 30’s early 40’s before I truly adopted a relationship with Jesus Christ. I repented for all of my sins and for turning back into the world. I was overjoyed, because I know He was with me through all of my mess. It could of been me dead and gone many times, but He kept me covered. I can’t ever thank Him enough!

I believe a person can repent and go back to Jesus, because they never lost their salvation, they lost their way! What they accepted when they got saved is in them. Somewhere in life they got off the path and turned back to the world. It doesn’t mean they forgot what they accepted into their life. Anyone can go back to Christ by repenting and asking Him back into their life. He never leaves us, we leave Him! He’s always waiting to welcome us back!

There are a lot of people who think they’ve messed up so bad they can’t go back. I don’t care what you’ve done you can always go back to Jesus. “He is the “way, the truth, and the light, no man cometh unto the Father, but by Him.” To make it to the Kingdom to meet our Creator (Our Father God), we have to believe in His Son Jesus (Romans 10:9).

Never allow anyone to deter you from going back to Jesus, your very soul is dependent on it. You can do so at anytime and anywhere. The problem with many people is once saved they think it gets them into Heaven. Wrong! It gives you salvation, it gives you the opportunity to know him personally and to live for Him. Jesus already paid the price for us when He died on the Cross! It doesn’t give you a seat in the Kingdom. We have to work for it. We must be born again, which means repentance of our sins and letting go of the ways of this world.

Too many want to hang on to the world, whilst professing Christ. These people are liars! You can’t serve God and the adversary the devil! You’re either for Jesus or against Him there are no other options. It saddens me the many people I know who profess with their mouths one thing, yet they live another. No one can truly love Jesus when they live this way. To love Him is to live for Him, point blank! We must be born again and we must live holy. We can’t pick Him up when we feel like following Him and put Him down when we feel like following the world. That is NOT how it works!

Jesus paved the way for salvation. He paid the price for us to have the opportunity and the ability to live holy lives. It is people who do not want this beautiful blessing. Sadly many people love the world more. They want affiliation, but no true relationship with Him. It doesn’t work! We must have the connection through a daily personal relationship with Him. We must be about our Father’s business every single day all day long. We must walk by faith and not by sight and we must allow the Holy Spirit as our lead and guide. It teaches us and strengthens us so that we can maintain and live holy lives. This is free to all who choose it! Still many talk it, but they don’t walk it! If we say we love Him we must live for Him, not sometimes, but all of the time!

Playing The Fool Gets You Played

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Yeah, I wrote! Listen we can try to sugarcoat and water things down, but the truth of the matter if you’re dumbing yourself down or playing the fool in a relationship, the ONLY one getting played is you!

As a woman I’ve heard other women say, “I’m pretending I don’t know this or that is going on or I’m just going along with it, but I know what’s up.” If you’re acting like you don’t know, but you are still going along with it, then you’re still accepting whatever it is. If you’re pretending to not see what’s happening, although you really do see. Then you’re accepting it! You’re
“playing the fool only to get played.” As long as you go along with another person’s crap, they get to do to you whatever they like. It says something about them, but it also says something about you!

Both men and women do it. They turn a blind eye to their situations as if it will make things go away. NO, it doesn’t! In their hearts they know the mess they’re in, but try to act as if it’s alright, when it isn’t. You’re only (playing the fool only to get played).

I know many of you won’t see it this way and I don’t expect for you too, but the truth is still the truth! People make a million excuses as to why they put up with what they put up with. Remember, people will treat you EXACTLY how you allow and in fact you teach them how to treat you! That goes for family, friends, significant others, children, co-workers, or whomever.

In many relationships people put up with unnecessary crap, because of their individual true relationship with self. People who are dealing with unresolved issues will oftentimes seek out things they desire and want, dismissing what they truly need. They will go along to get along; which includes putting up with unnecessary mess to be a part of something or to be loved. Most are led by their feelings and emotions.

Folks can sense vulnerability in others. They see it in the actions of others. There are plenty of people with agendas different than the person they are with. They will get from you what they can and they will treat you exactly how they want to, because it’s what’s allowed. They know it and you know it!

Trying to love someone into loving you just doesn’t work, especially when you don’t even love yourself. There are many people who don’t know what love is or what love isn’t. They go off of their feelings and emotions only to find themselves in bad situations in which they willfully got into. Sometimes you have to stop looking at the other person and examine yourself.

Many women accept ridiculous crap from their men. They have restrictions, boundaries, and guidelines put on them by their significant others, yet their significant others do what they want. You’re being played! I know it doesn’t sit well with someone, but it’s okay. I hope it rattles you enough to take an assessment of yourself and your situation.

I want people to stop denying the truth and face reality. A lot of people ask for the truth, but when they get it they feel some type of way about it. No matter the truth, some people will turn a deaf ear and blind eyes to it. It all goes back to who you really are as an individual. What’s inside of you speaks volumes in your actions.

I understand sometimes people are in very abusive relationships and they pretend this or that in fear of their lives. I completely understand this logic. However; no matter the situation if this happens, you’re still going along with it. You’ve given power to the other person to do whatever they want to do to you, because they know you’ll go along with it! Devastating as it may be you’re still “playing the fool and getting played.” Why? Because your significant other gets to treat you any kind of way, because it is what you’ve allowed. If you’re afraid to leave you’ve stayed way too long!! Seek help with your situation before it’s too late!

Moral of it this blog is your life belongs to you! Your power, self esteem, peace of mind, courage, strength, etc, etc, belongs to you and ONLY you! However, your significant other or anyone else whom you allow will take it from you causing yours to diminish. Never give anyone or anything power to take what belongs to you! Never play the fool, if you play the fool then you subject yourself to being played. Why? Because technically who you allow to play you see you as a fool! If you have to be lied to, deceived, manipulated, cheated on, abused, etc, etc it is NOT love, because love has NOTHING to do with it! Don’t play the fool, because it makes you one who will undoubtedly get played!

Staying Yet Straying

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Okay, here I go again. It is up to each individual as to what they choose in their relationships. However; you ARE to blame for what you allow. You’re to blame for what you accept and put up with. No one can do to you more than you allow. People allow much unnecessary drama in the name of love when love has nothing at all to do with it. Love isn’t those things a lot of people claim it to be.

People who stray outside of their relationships don’t do it because of the person their cheating on. Yes sometimes that person is a problem, but the real reason a person strays is due to their own inner issues. Some people make all of the excuses in their world, but at the end of the day, they cheat, because they want to.

If you stray it’s no one’s decision to do it, but yours. If you stay after he or she strays it’s no one’s decision, but yours to do it. People stray for many reasons, but the fact of the matter is those reasons are all excuses. People cheat because they want to and them wanting to come from other underlined unresolved issues. People stay for the same reason. People who stay give excuses as to why, however truth be told their reasons all boils down to what’s going on inside of them. This is normally due to long ago unresolved issues. People seek love no matter the consequences; which is a sad thing!

I’m all for people remaining together. However, only in healthy relationships! Anyone who stays in an unhealthy relationship must look at the man/woman in the mirror and figure out why. Anyone who’s cheating on their significant other must do the same. Facing inner issues is detrimental in being able to grow into mature adults.

Society is full of tainted and broken people filled with toxicities of their pasts. When people don’t deal with their issues it affects every facet of their lives (relationships, jobs, decisions, choices, health, etc). People embed themselves into all types of positions only to have their demons surface to the top and ruin their opportunities. People get into relationships with clear indications it’s bad from the start only to allow their demons and their significant others demons to rise up and interfere with the relationship.

“The blind can’t lead the blind, unless they both fall in the ditch.” You can’t save anyone and no one can save you! You can’t change anyone and no one can change you. As I will continue to say; families, friends, and significant others may motivate, inspire, or influence you, but the decision to be saved or change falls on the individual who needs it. People think their love making skills, cooking, material things, looks, statuses, titles; may influence a person to change. NOT necessarily!! Even if a person changes due to some type of influence if they don’t change because they feel a need to change the change will not be lasting. It will ONLY be temporary to appease the other person or the situation. The same issues will come up again and again.

Every last one of us can put on facades pretending to be this or that, but every single time something will show the truth. It may be subtle, but nevertheless the truth will always present. Who a person try to hide and who a person is are different for immature people who think they are mature. Those who pretend to be one way yet knowing they’re another show the true signs at some point. It is shown through their actions, decisions, choices, etc. It NEVER fails! We can run, change locations, change jobs, hide, deceive, pretend, disguise, put on facades. However, we can’t EVER run or hide from the truth. We can’t run or hide from self! The truth lies within!! Unless a person resolve their issues they will NOT mature to be the people they’re destined to be.

A cheater will cheat until he or she decides to deal with the inner man or woman and come to the conclusion they are better than that. They are never satisfied with who they have, because they don’t truly love self, due to their inner issues. They choose not to be faithful and loyal to no one, because they can’t be faithful or loyal to self. They are immature in their thinking and for them it’s about gratification of the flesh (physical body, their eyes, material things, statuses, etc).

A person will stay in an unhealthy relationship (cheated on, beat on, disrespected, mistreated in all forms), until they deal with the inner man or woman and decide they deserve better; which starts with loving self. It’s always up the individual. You, you, and I! Every last one of us willfully choose what we allow into our lives. We can make excuses, but what we choose falls on us individually.