Enslaved by Feelings and Emotions

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Millions are in many situations because they are being held mentally captive by their own free will. It doesn’t only apply to relationships it applies in all aspects of a person’s life. However this post is concerning relationships. It’s terrible the bad choices and decisions make based on what they think is love, especially when children are involved. I can talk or write about it all day, but people have to understand it for self. Many people find themselves in terrible situations and relationships because they are going off of feelings and emotions and NOT looking at the truth. They can’t see past their feelings and emotions.

When I was young I did it once, it was enough for me to learn. I never made the mistake again. You must see beyond what you’re feeling. Everything starts with a thought, however; if your thoughts are distorted then it means your feelings and emotions will be absurd. A person think they know the truth, but they are basing it on their distorted views. Those views are distorted because their thinking is distorted. The old saying is VERY true “everything that glitters isn’t gold.”

Never, ever, never get caught up in a situation or with someone where you are basing things solely on how you’re feeling. You are bound to make bad choices and decisions. People do this every single day. If you don’t know people who do this personally, I’m sure you’ve at least have heard about them. Yet, people continue to do it!

A person will never change their ways of thinking if they don’t think they have a problem. They will never change if they think what they do is right. They will never change if they think they have it all together. They will never change if they have given power to their feelings and emotions. When a person do not change they only remain the same.

Many make bad decisions and choices, some to the extreme of death either to self or a loved one. It takes self love and maturity to be able to see past your feelings. I believe with everything in me, when a person truly love his or herself they are careful and selective in who or what they allow in their life.

There are many people who want what isn’t good for them. The sad part many of these people know it’s not good for them from the start. Yet they can’t see the truth, because they are blind by their feelings and emotions. Relationships will continue to fail until people wake up! Those you choose to become involved with will treat you exactly how you allow. If you don’t care about and love yourself, don’t expect anyone to genuinely care and love you. It starts with you!

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When you Don’t Love Yourself

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It is apparent to most people, but not apparent to the individual. Most people think they have it all together, however the truth is told in the decisions people make about their lives. People are quick to say they want to know the truth until you give it to them, then they are upset with you.

There are many people in this world who are seeking love and many unfortunately think they’ve found it. My question is how do you know what love is from someone else when if you first don’t love yourself or haven’t really experienced it from anyone?

People focus on receiving love from others, but not on loving self. Other people will treat you exactly how you allow. I don’t care how good you treat someone else people will play with your heart, feelings, and emotions for as long as you allow. Why you may ask? It’s because they too have issues they need to face. If a person don’t know what love is they will accept what they are getting as love.

This is why we see many women and men getting with people who abuse them or kill them. They also abuse or kill their children. This is why we see people getting with individuals who drain them financially, mentally, physically, and emotionally. Again, people do to you what you allow. What they think is love simply is not!

When a person is desperate for love they will do anything to get it. This is a person who doesn’t love his or herself. There’s no way possible a person can love his or herself an allow someone else to mistreat them or their children. No way on earth! People who love self no their worth!

You shouldn’t have to buy love. By the way it’s impossible to buy love, people think they can. They aren’t buying love, they are buying the other person. Stop giving and watch what happens! You shouldn’t have to ever deal with abuse, disrespect, belittling, controlling individuals, obsessed or possessive individuals, or people who cause you or your loved ones harm. None of it signifies love in no kind of way.

A lot of people don’t know what love is, because it’s how they were brought up and unfortunately they got comfortable with it and settled for it. What I mean is as people get older who they choose to become falls on them. We can stay the same or we can choose to change. Point blank! People who do not embrace change carry baggage from one place to another continuing to pile up the drama in their lives and the lives of others.

If a person doesn’t love his or herself they will take and take either until some tragic happen or their eyes become open and they realize the unhappy relationship they are in. If you don’t love yourself people will sense your vulnerability and many will prey on you. Other people can sense when a person is eager in their quest for love. The people who prey have their own issues as well, but the individuals who become involved with them can’t see their issues, because they can’t see their own.

Love is many things, but it’s never abusive, disrespectful, controlling, demanding, obsessive, or possessive. It can’t be brought with money or material things. If you don’t love yourself it’s time to look in the mirror and deal with you! No one can fix you, but you!

Think about why are you allowing someone to treat you the way they are. Think about why you are settling. You will find it starts and ends with you! A person may try one time, but if you love yourself, you will nip it in the bud asap! Don’t allow your feelings and emotions to blind you to the truth. If you do you will always find yourself getting in a bad situation or staying in one. As I always say; face that man or woman in the mirror and accept a change needs to occur!

Making Your Pastor Your Master

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Yes, I’m on this again! Too many people in today’s churches have made their pastors/leaders their Master. They have put them on pedal’s acting as if they are God. Stop praising and worshipping the creature and start praising and worshipping the Creator! Your pastor’s knees has to bend like yours, they are servants just like you; NOT the Savior! They may be some of your god’s, but they aren’t the God Almighty, the Master, the Great I am, the Savior, at all!

Those pedal stools some people have put them on will cause them to tumble right into the pits of hell. The reason why is these leaders act like they are God. They are not!!! They act the way they do, because this is how hey are treated. Many have become puffed up and vain.

God isn’t pleased with what is going on in the churches today. Some things are completely out of order and totally against God. If your pastor is doing the right thing they would not allow any ole thing in the church. The stuff going on in some of the churches are the same things going on in the world.

Some pastors are ruling and controlling their member’s lives. They are telling them what they can and can’t do. They are telling them where they can and can’t go and who to socialize with. When pastor’s are controlling the lives of their members they have been allowed to go to far. People are brainwashed by their pastors. People need to read the Bible and seek understanding for themselves.

Most pastors are living way above their members. Some member’s are struggling giving their last while their pastors are living good lives. Something is wrong with that picture. Many of the churches don’t help their members when they need it and really don’t do anything for the community if they can’t make a profit. This isn’t the way the church should be.

Although they go to church faithfully, many members are still babes in Christ. They haven’t grown since accepting the Lord as their Savior. Most people in today’s church are still on milk. They haven’t grown because they aren’t seeking the Lord for themselves, instead they are seeking it all from their pastors. The meat they are being fed isn’t to help their spiritual growth, but instead it’s to edify their Pastor’s because it’s coming from them and NOT the Word of God. Therefore it can’t be ingested into their spirits, because they are still babes. How can a Shepherd lead his Sheep, when He isn’t truly a Shepherd of God? It’s impossible when God’s not in it! The Bible says ” the blind can’t lead the blind, less they both fall in the ditch.” People really need to seek God’s face for themselves if they TRULY want to make it to Heaven.

It’s disgusting and sickening to see how most of the pastors are being praised and worshipped. People are too busy trying to please their pastors until they can’t focus on God, because it’s NOT what they are being taught. They aren’t being taught how to live holy, how to activate the powers within them that God has given to us all, they don’t know demons and the supernatural is real, because they aren’t being taught any of this in today’s churches. God is still in the healing business and He’s still a miracle worker, the problem is people don’t believe, because people are walking by sight and NOT faith. Their eyes are on their pastors and what they can see with the natural eye, because it is what they are being taught.

Pastor’s today are too busy building up what they have made their kingdoms which are their churches/sanctuaries. Churches are trying to out do one another. They are too busy preaching material prosperity, but not at all focused on seeking souls for the Kingdom of God. They are too worried about their kingdoms down here on earth.

When you go to a church and they have ATM’s in the church, they are asking for bank statements and check stubs, they are blasting you for the amount of tithes you pay, they are charging you to sit in particular places during service, etc THEN YOU SHOULD HAVE SENSE ENOUGH TO KNOW SOMETHING IS WRONG! THIS ISN’T ABOUT GOD’S BUSINESS, IT’S ALL ABOUT THE CHURCH BUSINESS OF MATERIAL PROSPERITY. Pastor’s have made it all about money.

Jesus is coming back and He’s going to charge Pastor’s many times over for leading their flock astray, but He’s also going to charge the people for praising and worshipping their Pastors as if they are God. If someone doesn’t make it in it’s no one’s fault, but their own. It is up to each and every last one of us to get to know Jesus for ourselves, develop a daily relationship with him, and to live according to His Word. The same Pastors being praised and worshipped have to live according to His Word like us all. As I’ve said before and it is from the Bible “we can’t get to the Father unless we go through the Son.” The Son isn’t your Pastor, He’s the Son of God!

Unhealthy People, Unhealthy Relationships

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This is for a lot of people in unhealthy relationships. There are many people who are in terrible relationships. They are blind by their feelings and they will do anything to please the one they are with. For many people the focus is completely off. Most people drastically fail at getting to know the one they are with. They don’t adhere to the signs nor do they ask the right questions. All they care about is trying to win who they are trying to be with.

The reason people find themselves in terrible relationships is because their focus is on doing any and everything to please the one they are with. Many will even cross the line by doing things they wouldn’t normally do. They are moving solely on how they are feeling and unable to see the truth because of it. They think because they feel a certain way the actions behind their feelings will make the person they are with truly want to be with them. This isn’t so!

A person will take from you as long as you give. A person will do to you what you allow. It is you who teach the one you’re with how to treat you! If you think giving them everything is going to make them love you more, you’re wrong! They still won’t love you any more than they really do! Matter of fact some don’t love who they are with at all, they love what the person does to them and for them. Hurtful right? It’s true! It’s better to read about it then to be living it!

There are far too many people who get into one-sided relationships. They are too caught up in how they are feeling, therefore blind to the truth. They could see it if they chose to, unfortunately it’s not on the mindset of most; their interest is giving all they can to the other person, because they love them very much. At least so they think!

Don’t be a fool to love or to what you perceive as love. Perception is normally gravely distorted when a person is going off of their feelings. The more you think of someone (good or bad), the more provoking the thoughts become which leads to the over abundance of feelings. People are totally captivated by those feelings, which leads and have led many into terrible relationships. Many have lost their lives in bad relationships.

I’ve written many posts about this very issue, but no matter how much people read, hear, or see, they will foolishly get into unhealthy relationships. Some people don’t learn or change, because they don’t want to. They continue to live unhappy lives while wondering why their lives are unhappy. Makes no sense, but it’s the way many choose to live. Everything we do is about choices. We all make them whether good or bad.

When a person gives and gives to the significant person in their life never getting anything in return, except headaches and heartaches; they teach their significant other exactly how to treat them. When a significant other takes and takes, they teach the other person how to be treated. People who are focused on the feel good feeling will only see what they want. They are blind to everything else to a point and time when they are forced to open their eyes to the truth. By this time they are more than likely in an unhealthy relationship. At this point many are afraid to leave and afraid to stay. The ONLY way to avoid unhealthy relationships is by NOT getting into them in the first place!

I keep telling people love isn’t blind, those who think they are in love are blind by their perceptions of love.

Words Sweet as a Honeycomb

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Don’t be fooled by sweet and or slick talk. Too many are quickly deceived by the words that comes out of the mouth of people. A person’s words can sound real good, but aren’t worth a thing and doesn’t mean a thing, because the intentions behind the words are bogus.

When people haven’t matured they have the tendency to grasp on to whatever is said, because they are being led by their emotions and feelings. Later down the road they realize they bought “wolf tickets” that weren’t worth a thing.

A person can talk a good talk knowing the whole time they don’t intend to do what they say. They don’t mean what they say, they say it because they know it sounds good to the ears and they know you believe it. Remember I always say “we teach people how to treat us.”

You must learn to see the actions behinds a person’s words. When you see the actions it means those words has substance. The truth will always surface in some form if we are open to the truth. The problem is many are in too deep in their feelings and emotions, they overlook the truth.

There are many who are in relationships because the words spoken by their significant others sounded very good. We have heard forever “if it sounds too good to be true, it’s not true). Why is it that when it comes to relationships people completely forget about this cliché? People are too immersed in their feelings until they are oblivious to the actions of those they are with or perhaps want to be with. It is why many find themselves in unhealthy relationships. Their eyes are wide open but they fail to see a thing!

When I always say or write people are this way due to immaturity, I’m not trying to put anyone down at all. We all have been immature at some point in life. A person will mature by the aging process, but it doesn’t mean they are a mature adult, it ONLY means they have gotten older in age. People who are still being led by their emotions haven’t matured. Many people go through things, but they don’t learn from their experiences and oftentimes find themselves in and out of the same types of relationships with similar acting people. It’s because they having matured. Unfortunately some will die immature. Some people live, but never grow. They go through things, but don’t necessarily learn  which is how we grow and mature.

To really mature you must first know thyself. You must know who you are, by accepting all flaws and facing any issues you have inside to get to the point of loving thyself. You will learn from every experience and you will not allow what you’ve gone through to keep you in a stagnant state of mind. When you love yourself you will “guard your hearts.” You will no longer allow feelings and emotions to cause you to make the wrong decisions and choices. You will be able to see and enjoy the forest although it’s full of trees “so to speak.” You can see further than the end of your noses because your eyes are open and you can see the truth for the truth; beyond the smooth, sweet words. You will accept no matter how good something looks, sounds, feels, if it’s not good for you you’re not interested. Most importantly you will know the difference between wanting and needing something. or someone.

This post can relate to any facet of your lives. Stop going solely by what is said and start looking at the actions behind the words. If people do this a lot of  lives would be different. In my opinion a person’s words are only worth the actions behind them. A person can talk all day, yet do something totally different. They can speak a bunch of sweet nothings. Words can sound good, but hold no merit, because of the lack of actions behind them. When people get pass being led by their emotions and feelings they will understand this concept.

 

 

 

 

Life Goes On With Or Without You

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A lot of people inspire me to write about certain things. Today I want to tell you don’t give up! No matter the situation; no matter who, DON’T GIVE UP! There are many people in this world who are brokenhearted and completely at a point of giving up. In the whole scheme of things it’s not that person nor is it any particular situation that has caused you to feel this way or caused you to get to the point you’re at; IT’s YOU and how you’ve allowed things to affect you!!!!

Many times I’ve posted about how not to give your power to people or things. If you do; you can lose yourself in your situation if you’re not careful. Too many people have that save and fix it spirit. They want to save or fix the person they love so much; who by the way are causing them stress, anxiety, depression, etc. How can a person save someone else when they too need saving? It’s like the blind leading the blind. People do a lot of what they think is right in the name of love, until they find themselves messed up because of the situations they’re involved in. No individual can be in a healthy relationship if they’re carrying baggage from their past or previous relationships. We will always have the memories, but even memories fade IF we allow them too. Pasts are gone forever, it is the memories of people’s pasts that they continue to hold on tightly too. The memories are what fuels the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors/actions. It messes up many people for a life time.

If you’re in a relationship and the other person wants to get out, let them! You have no right to force them to stay. Stop giving your power to others and to your situations. Life goes on whether you roll with it or not. If you don’t roll with it, you’re stuck. You can find yourself in a place of misery, sadness, and confusion. Stop allowing people and things to define you. If a person no longer loves you, love yourself and have enough dignity and pride to move on. Life isn’t over. It didn’t begin with them and it won’t end with them. We as humans put too much stake in other people and by doing so we oftentimes end up in situations we regret.

No matter what is it; keep moving on. Troubles come and they go. Remember; if you process situations as if they’re unbearable and as if it’s the end of the world, then that’s how you will act towards those situation and it will show in your behaviors. People get twisted and tangled over their relationships and other situations, because they put too much stake in them and give too much power to those people and things.

I would never say not to love the one you’re with, but you have to understand it’s two in the relationship and you can’t make anyone love you no matter what you do UNLESS they choose too. Many people make their lives all about being loved by someone or loving someone,  when they don’t even love themselves. This is a clear sign something is wrong here!

People make life way harder than necessary. When it comes to relationships nothing is a surprise if you accept the truth as it’s presented and not lead blindly by emotions. Stop allowing your hearts to lead you where your brains are not following! Too many people want to give up on life when their relationships don’t work, this is VERY sad and it’s very clear these types of people don’t love themselves. These types of people are lead by their hearts and they’re seeking something to satisfy what’s missing in their lives. These are the types of individuals who are constantly dealing with emotional issues.

Same goes for different situations, no matter what; life goes on. If you didn’t get that promotion or job, then there are others. If whatever it is didn’t work out for you as long as you live there is another chance around the corner. It’s NEVER the situation or the person you love; it’s you! If you lose yourself in the midst of it all, then you have given up something valuable. That something valuable is your the ability to maintain the power that belongs to you. Any time you give it to someone or something; you will always find yourself on the short end of the stick.

You Created a Monster

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Many people are in unhealthy relationships due to starting out in ways and accepting things they shouldn’t have. They did everything under the sun to get who they are with and even more to keep them. I’ve said it a million times, “no matter what you do you can’t make who you love, love you back.” If you have to work hard to make a person love you, then you’re obviously with the wrong person. It’s a clear sign many ignore!

Too many individuals are in relationships where one or both involved are doing their own things. What type of relationship is it when you’re supposedly together, but doing your things separately as if single? Seriously, how you start a relationship is most often how it will end. Too many accept things they know aren’t good for them and they do things they know aren’t good for them in the name of what they think is love.

If you are giving into immoral sex acts to please your significant other, sooner or later you will be completely disgusted and grow tired of what you’re doing. Another issue here is people sometimes agree to involve other people, but later realize it was a bad idea. However, truth is you willfully created that monster. You were too wrapped up into pleasing the other person you made it all about the him or her and what would please them. How you truly felt was put on the back burner, because you made it completely about the one you were with. Yes, you created the monster! This is no way to build a healthy relationship.

I’ve mentioned in many posts the fact that if you start out by buying him or her material things to please them or to get them, you’re only “creating a monster.” People will take from you as long as you give. If you start your relationships off by trying to buy his or her love, that is what they will know you by best. They will expect those things to keep coming and as soon as you stop doing it, you will see the truth of what your relationships are built on. It’s the same with money period! If every time you have to give them money for this and that; “you’re creating a monster.” You started it and it will be expected. You have set yourself up as Mr. or Ms. “Savings and Loan.” Yes you did it to yourself!

There are many women who are in relationships with guys who could not rub two pennies together, but they allow how he looks or how he makes them feel to dictate how they feel about him. She has no support from him, but she doesn’t seem to mind, until “ding” a light comes on. She then realizes how ridiculous it is to take care of a grown man who doesn’t want to work , because he’s pure lazy. She begins to realize how draining it is and grows tired of clothing, sheltering, and feeding him; then she wants something different. Well, the truth is these women “created that monster.” Men do it too! They fall for women who they are trying to save. They get with low esteemed women who have a lot of issues, no drive or ambition. These men are like some women, they’re blind by their emotions. I know the Bible says the man is the head of the house, but it doesn’t mean he is a slave for his wife, no more than it does she’s a slave to him. We all create many of the monsters in our lives.

I must also talk about women who get with men who pretend to be into them, but  are really into their children. Yes, you read it correctly. If you don’t believe me, please research it for yourselves. We are now into 2016 and it’s time people start making better decisions for themselves and their children. Stop trusting people with your children that you don’t even know. It’s tough enough trusting anyone, but to trust these men you just met can turn horrific. I can’t tell you how many articles I’ve read on last week on the subject of men raping and molesting infants and children. A lot of people are into child porn, their main interest are children so they get with women they know are gullible and eager for someone to love them in order to get next to their children.  These men are embedded through societies all over the world. Some women know their histories, but they still make the terrible decisions to be with these men. Again, if you think I’m fabricating anything research it. It is time these types of women make better choices. The same logic goes for people who continue in relationships with any type of  an abuser. They created their own monsters.

People; it’s no big secret at all. A person will treat you exactly how you allow. Millions in this world are in terrible relationships. There are many who’ve had to deal with the consequences of their bad decisions. The reason people are stuck in these types of relationships is because they allowed their hearts to lead them into their relationships without using their brains. If people could and would only accept this concept their lives could be different. I know I can talk about it and write about it until I die, people still will be led by how they feel about someone versus reality of what’s happening right in their faces.

These monsters come in all sizes, colors, and shapes. They are from all walks of life, populations, and cultures.  They are lurking and seeking whom they can devour. They are waiting on the right person to come along so they can get them where they want them in order  to do what they do. No one have to fall into their traps! Stop thinking you can save someone unless they want to be saved. Stop giving your hearts to people who don’t even have one. Stop seeking love when you don’t even love yourself or know what love is. Stop wearing your hearts on your sleeves like a neon light, making yourselves vulnerable targets for those seeking to devour you. Stop allowing your pasts to dictate your futures because of your inability to let go of something that’s already gone. Stop allowing your feelings about someone to lead you astray.

I can go on and on, but the bottom line is stop giving power to others. I guarantee you if you stop, the monsters lying dormant waiting will never have the opportunity to pounce on you. You do this by loving you first and by not allowing your hearts to lead you into places you shouldn’t ever be.

Read carefully, if you don’t allow your hearts to lead, you will not get all caught up in your feelings over the other person. You will be able to see right past your emotions to the truth that’s staring you right in the face.  Whenever you’re feeling all caught up in your feelings about your significant other that is the time to step back and reassess yourself and the relationship. If you don’t learn to put what you’re feeling aside and focus on the big picture,  it will be like seeing through a cotton ball (impossible). You will miss or rather dismiss all of the signs that have been right in your faces. It’s a  New Year and today is another chance to get it right and do better!!!! I pray that you make the right choices and decisions in 2016. Peace and love!!