Loving to the Point of Losing Yourself

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Some people may not admit it, but I know a lot of people find themselves in this type of situation. It is unhealthy! If you lose yourself in someone the only reason a person does this is because they’ve never really found self. People who don’t know the difference between wants and needs are people who don’t know what’s right for them. Oftentimes they are people who don’t understand what love is and what it isn’t. They seek love in all the wrong ways, with all the wrong people, and wrong the places. They end up in unhealthy and sometimes downright dangerous relationships.

I’ve met a tremendous amount of people who have told me they were deep into their significant other until they lost sight of who they were. Some went off into the deep end doing things they never wanted to do and acting ways out of the norm only to appease their significant other. Many people get lost trying to save or fix their significant others. If you’re trying to save or fix someone then it’s obvious you have things to work out within yourself.

Many individuals give up their hopes and dreams to help their significant others to obtain theirs. Nothing is wrong with supporting your significant other, but you should never give up your dreams to do so. There are many people who end up separating after their significant others has obtained their goals and the person left behind feels lost and brokenhearted. It’s what you signed up for, because you can change your situation anytime you choose!

I’ve written and said many times a person can definitely lose self trying to be in an unhealthy relationship with someone else. There are many people who seek love from others, yet they don’t love self. What sense does that make? They look pass all the signs of potential problems because they are led by their feelings and emotions. They are dead set on trying to fix or save the one they are with. People have lost their sanity and health trying to make it work with toxic and broken individuals. It compiles their own problems with the problems of their significant other. If you find yourself in this type of relationship re-examine yourself by looking inward to figure out why you’re putting yourself through it. You can’t fix or save anyone, especially if they’re not ready to change!

A person who loves self will not tolerate any unnecessary chaos or discord in their lives. They love self enough to walk away from people who bring toxicity and negativity their way. They look past looks, material things, statuses, etc. They understand a peaceful mind is priceless! They aren’t trying to save, fix, teach, or raise no adult! People will be treated how allowed. If you take crap, crap is what you will get! Period!

You can’t make a person want to change no matter how much you love them. People have to want to change their negative states of mind. They must want to become better individuals NOT because of you, but because it’s what they need in their life with or without you! Individual’s who change for other people will most likely revert back to who they really are once they’ve gotten comfortable enough in the relationship. The signs will be present, but unfortunately the person who is busy and fixated on trying to save or fix misses the signs until they become drained and overwhelmed with it all.

The greatest teacher in my life has been experience. Ooooweee! There are some things I am so thankful I went through, because it taught me never EVER do it again. I learn from everything. I know a lot of people don’t, they keep going through the same things with the same types of people. It’s because they aren’t ready to change. You need to change from the person who is always trying to fix and save just as much as the person you’re trying to save or fix. If not you will always continue to have chaos in your life and relationships!

When you continue to accept discord and chaos stop pointing the finger. The other person may very well be a part of the problem, but you’re the biggest problem, because no one can dictate your life unless you allow. If you allow chaos and discord, guess what? You will get it! Don’t allow anyone to cause you to stress out to the point of losing your mind and health. People end up on psychotropic medications due to stress, anxiety, depression, fear, hopelessness, etc, etc. This happens because people lose self in trying to love someone healthy. You can’t do it anyways, but especially when you’re in an unhealthy state of mind yourself. People must want to change, be willing to change, and put in the time and effort to do so! You can’t do it for them no matter how much you love them.

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Leader or not What’s in the Heart Comes out

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A real leader is servant first and they know how to lead by example. Regardless of what position a person holds it DOESN’T mean they are qualified to hold it. It doesn’t mean they have the skills or ability to lead. I see it every single day. I also saw it a lot as a soldier. I’ve written and said a million times you can put ANYONE in ANY position; status NOR money WILL change the type of heart a person has. The type of heart a person has will ALWAYS eventually show who you’re really dealing with! People can hide who they are from others until who they really are surfaces to the top. Whether good or bad; what’s inside is coming out one way or another!

A person who isn’t capable of leading properly can cause chaos for those around them; which ultimately leads to division. “A divided house can not stand.” When some people get into certain positions they think they are above the law and even God. Many people heads are in clouds, because they think they are untouchable. It’s straight vanity. God doesn’t appreciate vainness. One thing for sure (what goes up MUST come down) just as what’s in the heart WILL eventually come out!

Too many people are in positions with messed up and cold hearts. Many of these individuals are in positions of authority and power. They love controlling and having authority over others, because it gratifies them. They are individuals with a multitude of issues. They spew seeds of division amongst people. Why? It’s because of their hearts. These types of people have issues which has caused them to be the way they are and many of them think the way they are is okay. Wrong!

Sadly society is fixated on the positions people hold and NOT whether or not people are capable of holding the positions they are in. If you’re a broken person how on earth can you lead others? It’s like the blind leading the blind. The outcome is division and oftentimes destruction in the lives of others. Bottom line is as the Bible says “how can the blind lead the blind less they both fall in the ditch.”

In this world messed up individuals are embedded throughout the world in different positions; some are positions of power while others are not. They love control and authority and are oftentimes demanding of respect; yet gives none. The outcome is always the same (division, chaos, and drama). The heart will NOT change unless people choose to change their ways of thinking. These people were directly taught distorted and wrongs of thinking or either they developed distorted and wrongs of thinking due to past issues. They move along in and out of positions with the same messed up mentalities. They prey on others, especially those they see as weak and vulnerable.

There are a lot of people with hidden agendas. They get into positions to play out their hidden agendas. Certain positions allows them access to do just that! What’s in the heart will always come out of you! It only lays dormant until it rises to the surface. People can’t contain their demons. What’s in is coming out!

Author of Destruction

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I wanted to write about what is going on in the minds of people. Many people in this world are under the influence of the devil and they don’t know it. Too much evil is going on and societies are chalking it up as mental illness when it’s not. I heard on the news yesterday a woman stabbed her four children and their father to death. Tell me that’s not pure evil????????????

The devil is busy killing, stealing, and destroying. Those who haven’t uncovered the truth of what is going on with self will continue lives of dysfunction. They will continue on paths of destruction until they discover who they can be and stop embracing what they are. They then can recover and live the lives God intended.

People succumb too easily to the trick of the devil because they don’t really understand they are under his influence. When you’re not connected to Jesus you are capable of doing anything. People who aren’t in tune with self certainly aren’t in tune with God the Father and Jesus the Son.

The reason the devil is getting into the minds of people is because they are living by the flesh alone. They are in the world doing all the worldly things. They have focus on all of the wrong things. They are self absorbed and selfish; making things all about self.

Those who aren’t in tune with self are led by their negative ways of thinking. They get something into their heads/minds and although technically they know what they’re thinking isn’t right, they will continuously ponder over it until they develop feelings behind the thoughts; leading to negative actions behind the feelings. This is how people end up making bad choices and decisions; they are led by their negative and distorted ways of thinking. When you ponder long enough over negative thoughts you will more than likely act on those thoughts. People are giving power to the negativity until it takes over. This is a form of possession.

It’s nothing but the devil. He already know the minds of many people are weak. These people already have many unresolved issues they haven’t let go; which has already caused them to lead chaotic lives. It’s all destruction and the devil is the father of destruction. When you let him drive he takes over and control. This is what’s happening in the world many are under the influence of the devil and moving at his command without any resistant. This leads people to making some of the worst decisions and choices of their lives.

The powers of good and evil are in full effect. What we choose is what we choose. The devil don’t tight anyone up to serve him, he enters in through all of the avenues people make available. The devil doesn’t fight against those who are on his side; he simply leads them into further destruction and ultimately death. People must wake up!