You’re Your Own Stumbling Block


I wanted to write about the topic I chose today, because most of you think who you really are is hidden. What really lies within a person for most is something they try to hide from the world. Pretending to be something you’re not keeps a person from becoming the best person they can become. It hinders them in a way where it doesn’t allow them to address the inner man that has them in bondage (what’s inside which is who they really are).

The majority of the humans inhabiting the earth are dealing with the same things. We all go through similar adversities. Nothing is “new under the sun.” Individually people think they’re alone in their situations, but they’re not! Most times it’s about something a person has done or it’s something a person has had done to them. It doesn’t matter which, it all derived from the same place which was cause by something they’ve dealt with at some point in life.

A couple of days ago a soldier was arrested for having a relationship with a young teenage girl. The girl had met him online and ran away to be with him. This soldier had her at his house and this is where the girl was found. This soldier knew without a doubt what he was doing was wrong. He’s a grown man (I believe in his 30’s) and the girl was a fourteen year old. He allowed his emotions to lead him to do something that is against the law. People do the crime without thinking about the consequences until it’s too late. This is because most are lead blindly by their hearts. This behavior comes from all of the mess people keep inside that causes dysfunction in their lives.

No one can mature into individuals who are consciously thinking before they actually act; if change in them doesn’t occur. I mean; a person must think before they make bad choices or decisions. No one does this if they’re making choices according to how they feel. If people took the time to think before they did things their decisions would be different. Unfortunately this isn’t the case with most.

Many people pretend to be one way when they’re another. This doesn’t help, it hurts, because this isn’t dealing with and fixing you, it is enabling you to continue to live lies. People get caught and then they’re sorry. Sadly even when some are caught the behaviors doesn’t change. Behaviors won’t ever change until CHANGE actually occurs. Change will never occur until people deal with who they really are.

People think they are hiding who they really are from the world. They go out of their ways to fake people out, lie, and deceive. You can’t ever fool the man in the mirror which is yourself. You have to live with you twenty-four hours a day. No matter how hard people try to hide; the truth shows through the bad choices and decisions people make. The truth always appear in some form or fashion.

Hiding, pretending, lying, being deceitful, or whatever you call it is does nothing but keep a person stuck in their negative ways of thinking and doing. The way a person grows and matures is by working on self. When people consciously, intentionally, and consistently work on self, they ultimately become better people who are more wiser individuals who make wiser choices and decisions.

My recommendation is that people learn to deal with whatever is wrong. Don’t run from it, because you can’t EVER run from yourself. Face whatever it is and be true to you! No matter what you’re facing; DEAL with it!! Learn from your bad decisions and choices and move on. Don’t continue to settle with being the way you are! If you know what you’re doing is wrong and you can’t seem to stop it on your own SEEK help. If you’re willing what you know is wrong, then be willing to face up to what you’re doing and seek help for whatever problems you have. You can’t change the behavior without changing yourself. You can’t change yourself if you’re not willing to face the man in the mirror (yourself). My prayer is that you do!! No one can change you, but you!




Listen ladies. I don’t know how many times I have to talk about this, but whatever the case I will continue on until people get it. If you’re in a relationship and the other person show you signs of who they are, “please” believe it! It’s no fluke, accident, or any of that, it is what it is. It’s a sign of what’s to come. If you accept it the first time it’s will happen again.

Please stop getting deeper into these unhealthy relationships. All you’re doing is putting yourselves in jeopardy and perhaps those around you in jeopardy as well. Haven’t you all seen the countless amounts of stories where significant others (ex, current, etc) have harmed or killed the individuals they were with and those who were around the person they killed? Wake up! Please stop getting in and/or staying in unhealthy relationships. It’s not good for you. It drains you and will break you down if you stay attached to this unhealthy lifestyle.

What’s really even more disturbing is that you’re bringing these men around your children. You’re showing your sons and daughters how to treat people and how to allow others to treat them. You’re teaching them this unhealthy lifestyle is acceptable when it’s NOT! Children do NOT ask to be born. They shouldn’t be subjected to such chaos. Your children should be priority NOT the man you’re with. Get your heads out of the dirt. Stop making excuses and stop accepting excuses.

It’s so sad to see young women who think they’re in love only to find themselves in bad situations that many have a hard time leaving and some who never leave because they are murdered by the ones who were suppose to love and cherish them. The big problem here most times the love is one way, but because people get quickly caught up in their feelings they fail to take notice of how they’re being treated. They are too worried about what they’re feeling, showing, and doing for the one they think they love. When you’re with someone you can’t see the truth if you’re being led by your emotions. If you’re blind by emotions you will end up in a lion’s den. Trust me! I’ve seen it and heard it over and over.

I don’t care how cute he is or what he has, it matters none at all. How he treats you is what matters. If he is up in your face crying and saying he can’t live without you or that he loves you to death. You need to move away from that relationship. You need to move on before it gets to that point. If he’s clingy and wants to always be with you or monitors your coming and going; something is wrong with this picture. If he controls what you’re doing; you’ve let it get too far. Listen, it’s NOT cute, it’s not him showing affection. It is clear signs that there could be potential danger to come.

Ladies, you must open up your eyes and stop being led totally by your hearts alone. You MUST see the truth and you must use your brains. Stop being foolish! A man who is mature and loves his significant other will treat her with respect and love. He isn’t  controlling, demanding, disrespectful, overbearing, or abusive.

Good looks are great, but they will not keep a relationship together. Sex is just sex and flesh taking control when it’s done outside of a marriage. Stop allowing your flesh to guide you into things you later regret. Many of you foolishly get pregnant in thinking he will change, but he won’t! If he’s a lazy bum when you met him it is not likely to change. Only difference is later on you will get tired of it and finally see the light, but by then it will be hard to get rid of him, because he will have gotten used to you taking care of him. If he’s abusive in any way at all whether physical, emotional, or verbally the time to leave is with the first episode. Stop giving first, second, third, etc chances when he doesn’t deserve the first one you gave him. He will continue to be abusive, he will more than likely not change, don’t risk it.

A man will do what you allow him to do. If you accept him any kind of way, any kind of way is what he will be and any kind of junk is what he will give you. It is no one’s fault but yours. These are avoidable situations, but women continue to get into these unhealthy relationships.

Work on you, because there’s obviously something wrong with any woman who feel she doesn’t deserve better. There’s something wrong with any woman who thinks she needs a baby with every man she gets with. Something is wrong any woman who allows a man to treat her any way he pleases. Something is wrong when any woman accepts any and everything from her man. Something is wrong when he’s rolling in your car and you’re stuck someone and can’t get home. Something is wrong when she’s getting out of bed for work while he’s sleeping in, because he doesn’t have a job. I can go on and on.

Ladies if he doesn’t have a job and isn’t trying to get one, RUN! You can’t survive on his looks unless he’s a working model. Otherwise looks doesn’t amount up to a hill of beans. Sex gets old and when you’re sick of it, then you get sick of him and by that time he’s gotten use to you taking care of him and will have a problem leaving. Stop raising these grown men!!

Stop getting into these unhealthy relationships. You’re your own problem and before you try to get into any relationship you need to work on you. If you work on you and figure out who you are, you will never allow just ANY old man in your life simply to say you have a man. Learn what’s important and what’s not important in a relationship. Stop being led by the emotions of your heart.

I want men to know that although I wrote this to the women, some of you fall into the same situations. Some of you are treated exactly like some of the women I’ve written about. A good man deserves nothing less than a good woman and vice versa; bottom line!!!



Yes, I’m at it again. I pray that people get it. If you read my posts and you know someone who can benefit from them, please tell someone about them. I am addressing several situations, because we hear about them so much, but what I am going into detail about can be applied in any situation.

Too many people are getting into serious trouble because they are allowing what they’re thinking and feeling to lead them into bad situations. I promise you if you take the time to think about situations you’re involved in with CLARITY you will STOP making bad decisions.

Many across the world are finding themselves in bad situations due to those bad decisions. Emotions are powerful. They come from our thoughts and they can cause debilitation if we allow. If you ponder and ponder over something, you will keep whatever the thought is; fresh in your mind. You will get anxiety and other issues because of your negative ways of thinking. When thoughts are negative or plain WRONG this is when you should resist those thoughts. Don’t allow the feeling you’re experiencing to lead you in the wrong direction. You resist them by being responsible, honest, and straightforward with yourself. If it’s wrong, you must accept that it is wrong and you must think of the consequences from those negative ways of thinking and feeling. If you keep thinking on whatever it is, you will probably eventually act upon those thoughts and feelings.

People need to get a tight grip on reality and stop making senseless decisions based on their emotions. Stop getting into unhealthy and dead end relationships when the truth is right in your face. Too many people get into abusive (all forms) relationships and then wonder how they got there. You got there by ignoring the signs that presented before you. You were filled with emotions about the person and because of it you ignored the truth. People believe because of what THEY feel for the other person the person will feel the same about them and change. This is NOT the truth! Face reality and deal with it, make decisions that are good for you. Know your value and self worth, if you don’t you will forever make bad decisions.

The same goes for people who get caught up in sexual relationships with underage individuals or child porn. They have allowed their thoughts and feelings to cause them to act on things they KNOW are wrong. Although wrong, they keep allowing their twisted distorted ways of thinking to get them into deep trouble. People get into this warped sense of thinking, because a lot of times they were sexually abused. Regardless no one should EVER do to another person what was done to them. Learn positive ways to deal with those thoughts and feelings. You can’t do this by trying to hide them. You can pretend and try to hide those thoughts and emotions from other people, but you can’t pretend or hide them from yourself. If you have these ways of thinking and feeling, and you haven’t properly dealt with those issues you will eventually act on what you’re thinking and feeling.

The same goes for people who are contemplating hurting themselves, other people, or perhaps both. These people didn’t think about it one time, they have been pondering over those thoughts and they have been feeling some kind of way about it for a long time UNTIL they were consumed and overtaken by those negative thoughts and feeling. They end up doing the unthinkable. Again, this is what happens when people allow those negative thoughts to run free in their minds. They develop all of the emotions from that negative way of thinking.

Anyone and everyone who has the mental ability to understand or comprehend can change their ways of thinking about any situation by removing their self from it mentally. What do I mean? It’s not really anything hard to do, but people make it hard, because they don’t want to give up their old ways. The only way to grow is by applying it to your life so that change can occur. To remove yourself mentally is to take notice and ownership of those negative thoughts. You can’t deal with ANYTHING by pretending NOTHING is wrong. You must take ownership and responsibility of your negative thoughts. I don’t care what happened to you or who did it to you. You MUST take responsibility and ownership of your own life and the negativity you’ve come to embrace.

Once you take true ownership, you can then begin to think with a conscious determination. What I mean by that is; you must become fully aware of what you’re thinking. You must realize in order to foster change that you have to accept the fact that the thoughts are negative. For the purposes of this post, I’m talking strictly about how you feel about someone or something. Example; If you’re feeling all jolly about a man or woman who’s physically abusing you or mistreating you in ANY way, this is a negative way of thinking. You must accept it as such and not be lead by your emotions. If you do you’ll see clearer and have the sense, strength, and ability to move away from people and things that aren’t good for you.

The more you are aware the more you will alter your way of thinking by replacing the negative thoughts with positive ones and ultimately doing the right things. Don’t fool yourself in thinking because YOU feel good about something that it’s right. This is a distorted way of thinking, ESPECIALLY when what you’re thinking is wrong. This happens when people are going off of their emotions. Accept the truth, take ownership and responsibility that your thoughts and feeling have blocked your ability to think rationally. By doing this you’ll become conscious of those thoughts so you can bring about change.

I guarantee anyone; the more you are aware of your negative thoughts and begin to implement positive self-development the negativity will change into positivity. The only way you can do this is by saying no to yourself and embracing the positive thoughts (every time). You MUST be determined, dedicated, and most importantly CONSISTENT. The more you do this, the stronger you will become and you will begin to see a change in the way you’ve been thinking and allowing your emotions to control you.

I won’t lie and say that you won’t become frustrated, but know that anytime you’re trying to change something this will happen, because you’re implementing something new into your life. This form of self-development and growth will change you into a better, stronger person. It’s like anything else you want to learn, the more you practice this; the stronger you will become.

It doesn’t matter what happened, when it happened, who was involved in shaping and forming your negative ways of thinking, etc. Change ONLY starts with you! If you want to do it you can and you will. If not, you will still live in a world of lies and deceit. You will continue to lie, hide, pretend, etc until you’re caught in the act and the world has found you out or until you’re in a bad situation, and/or until you’re dead (mentally, spiritually, and oftentimes physically). Those are the outcomes of acting on negative thoughts and feelings. They make you feel good when they are not good. No one can be truly positive by living such a negative life.

My prayer is that you choose to change!!!




If you don’t face it, you will continue to do what you’re doing. This post is for anyone out there doing something you THINK you’re getting away with. If you DON’T stop; your transgressions will come to the light.

I don’t know what you’re doing, but I know millions of you are doing things that are VERY wrong. You can move to a new state, city, or country. You can run, but you can’t EVER hide and your mess eventually catches up with you. You can hide from your neighbor but you CAN’T hide from God or from yourself. What’s done in the dark will surface to the light if you don’t stop doing it and sometimes even if you do.

People are so shocked and bewildered when they hear news of individuals doing things seemingly out of character. It’s out of character to you, because you couldn’t read between the lines, didn’t read between the lines, or you ignored what you saw. The truth is always shown to some degree at some point. They weren’t out of character; it’s who they really are and has always been. Only; now they’ve gotten caught. The signs don’t lie and for the millionth time; there are ALWAYS signs.

These individuals are ALWAYS embedded in low and high paying positions; from a gutter cleaner to the white house. They hold  many titles, some have many acronyms behind their names, filthy rich, dirt poor, in the spotlight every day or a celebrity of some sorts, liked by many, appear to have it all together, and a million other things. NONE of it changes the man you see in the mirror. You know who you are and what you are. Your secrets aren’t secrets to God. What you do behind closed doors and what you think is in secret; will be revealed if you don’t change your ways and sometimes they’re still revealed even if you do.

START working on being delivered from the things you’re doing. Things that YOU know are wrong. The ONLY way you can change is by first acknowledging that you NEED to change and facing the man in the mirror. You CANNOT do that by continuing to partake in your mess. You CANNOT do it by denying that you are who you are. No matter how you became what you are; it is what it is and in your heart of hearts YOU know what you do isn’t right. No matter what happened to mold and shape you, the decision to become you was yours to make. People must STOP making excuses for what they are doing and take ownership of the fact that it’s by FREE choice. You could have always made the choice to do differently. Problem is most don’t think they will ever be found out.

Think about how you’d feel if what you’re doing was done to those you love the most; by someone else. You may have gone through something traumatic, I am sorry for you, but that’s reason enough for you NOT to do what you’re doing. Face who you’ve become and deal with it appropriately. You can’t do it by hiding and conniving; thinking because you’re getting over you’re getting by. You’re not!

Many get into positions or situations so they can get in close proximity of people they want to manipulate and prey on. This can be in a physical way (sexually, etc), to steal from, or to do whatever they want to accomplish. When wrestling with personal demons stop setting yourself up for failure, by getting into these positions or situations in thinking no one will suspect you. Well, it’s true, no one may suspect you, but you will be found out sooner or later.

You know EXACTLY who you are. Today if you’re above the dirt and not beneath, this is a chance for you to change who you’ve become in order to be set free. No longer allow the things you’ve held in and hid for so long to keep you prisoner. You can be delivered on today.

I pray that if you don’t know God you get to know Him today, because He knows exactly what you’re doing, it’s NO secret to Him. It’s NO secret that you know what you’re doing is wrong, if you didn’t know it was wrong, you WOULDN’T BE TRYING TO HIDE IT. Right?????????????????????????????????????

The choice to change is yours to make. I pray you make the right one!



I already know a lot of people will be mad about this, but I don’t apologize for the truth. I also know you will say I’m judging and although it’s not true, say what you want. When a person tells the truth it will affect people. When people feel the sting of the truth they will feel some kind of way about it and oftentimes they will say they’re being judged. I’m not the judge, but it is my duty to spread the truth, like it or not. IF NOT; I’m charged just like everyone else.

What I’m seeing in many of the churches today is mockery and shame in the eyes of God. The things some leaders are doing today is not in line with God. They have brainwashed their flocks. People of today are poisoned by the words of man and not equipped or empowered by the WORD of God. They’re in church CLEARLY praising and worshipping their leaders.

There are leaders up in the pulpits cursing, sexing members of their congregation, preaching everything about the world, but aren’t teaching or preaching the true Word of God. Instead they’re preaching watered down versions of what they want the people to know. People are lost and confused for several reasons the main one is because they’re straddling the fence. Many aren’t even on the fence; going to church is like going to the movies or a sporting event. They go for entertainment and they go faithfully! Most go out of pure tradition. Those that are straddling the fence are straddled for one reason only. THEY DO NOT FULLY BELIEVE IN THE EXISTENCE OF GOD. If they did their lives would be different and they definitely wouldn’t be straddled the fence.

They’re lost and confused because they do not know God and His Son Jesus for themselves. They only know what they’ve heard. When this is the case, a person is liable to follow anyone and fall for anything. You must get to know Him for yourselves and get into a daily walk with Him (the Word, prayer, praise, and worship). If you don’t know Him for yourself the world always seems to look more enticing than what it is, but it’s the trick of the enemy. To give it up seems like a tragedy, but what people don’t understand is to NOT give it up WILL be a tragedy.

The world is shocked when they see and hear all of the foolishness leaders all over the world are doing. It’s not shocking to me, but it is sad. Not only sad because they’re leading the people astray, but because they’re mocking God and condemning their lives to hell IF they don’t make a change.

Today it’s about power and greed; leader’s are lead by the mighty dollar! Churches have ATM’s, café’s, bookstores, and other things inside of the church. It may be in the foyer, but it’s still inside of the building. Don’t leaders know this is wrong? God Himself turned over tables and made a big deal over it when He saw people selling etc in the temple.  These leaders are making it all about money. They’ve lost sight of the truth and their good intentions have fallen by the wayside. Well, let me back up. Some NEVER had the right intentions from the start; because for them it started out being about money.

This is why you see many leaders doing things unbecoming of a men and women of God. They’re leading their flocks, but they don’t even know who they are or to whom they serve. They’re just as blind and lost as their flocks. The Bible says “how can the blind lead the blind, lest they both fall into the ditch.”

I’m not saying none of us are perfect, but what I am saying is IF you are TRULY a new creature everything about you will change (your spiritual walk, talk, thoughts, overall presentation, dress, etc). Why, because your heart and mind will become on one accord. You will not be the same, you can’t be the same, and you wouldn’t want to be the same. Will temptations come, YES it will. It is the devil’s job and desire to lead God’s people astray, but the more you grow the stronger you become and the more you will place God at the forefront of all you do. This makes you better equipped to resist the devil and make him flee. He will try and try, but if you stay strong and rooted in the Word of God and adopt that daily fellowship with Him, you will be able to stand any and all tests.

Many leaders don’t want to give up this world just like a lot of their flocks don’t want to give it up. So they stand in their pulpits preaching what they want to in order to keep their people in brainwashed states of minds and submission. They give just enough to make the people feel that they’re a part of something special. Many of them are wolves in sheep’s clothing. People who don’t know God for themselves will and are falling for everything their leaders say and do.

Oftentimes the discretions of leaders are revealed to the public, but their congregations uphold their wrong. They’re not being held accountable and it’s why they go right on to do other things against God. They feel VERY powerful and untouchable. The part about this that breaks my heart is the fact how people persecuted, condemned, beat, and murdered Jesus for doing wonderful marvelous works, yet the world upholds all of the mess some of their leaders are doing today. It makes no sense. This is because people praise and worship man and not the Creator.

Leaders aren’t teaching about demonic spirits, spiritual attachments (which aren’t always demonic, but they can be aggravating to the physical body). They aren’t teaching hell damnation, soul salvation and living holy, or becoming and remaining a new creature. They’re teaching a lot of building up your material homes and possessions. When you die you take NOTHING with you. I don’t care what they put in the casket with you or on you; you can’t take it with you. “From dust you came and from it you will return.”

I believe the reason leader’s don’t teach these things is because they don’t believe in them no more than they believe in the existence of God or they’re afraid of it. They fear demons, etc, but don’t believe in God (makes no sense). If they believed they  would be doing, teaching, and preaching differently. It’s okay to teach your flock how to become the best individuals they can be in all areas of their lives. However, when how to prosper in a way to gain material possessions or worldly statuses is the ONLY thing or the MOST important things being taught, SOMETHING IS WRONG. The Bible says “Lay not up for yourselves treasures upon earth, where moth and rust doth corrupt, and where thieves break through and steal.”   But lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven where neither moth, nor rust doth corrupt, and where thieves do not break through nor steal.  (Matthews 6:19 & 20).

If you’re not doing the right thing here on earth. you’ll fail to set yourself up for these things in heaven, you CAN’T blame anyone but YOU! Following the leaders and being lead wrong is a decision made by YOU! People must pray for understanding, wisdom, and knowledge so the blinders can be removed from their eyes. A person has to have a sense of right and wrong, when they don’t they’re likely to be like a leaf in the wind, they will follow what sounds and looks good to them and not necessarily what is right or wrong according to the word of God.

I’m not perfect, but I NEVER use it as an excuse to do something I know isn’t right. I’m not that person I used to be. I don’t do those things I once done and have no desire to do so. I am aware of my thoughts, feelings, and actions. I am also aware of those belonging to others. The Bible says “to try the spirit by the spirit.” If you’re truly on the Lord’s side and living holy, you don’t look at people totally with the nature eye, the spiritual eye is always seeing beyond the natural, because of the Holy Spirit that dwells within. It comes naturally.

I know people get sick of hearing or reading about me talking about Jesus. It is my duty and the duty of any person who claims to love the Lord and is on His side; to sow seeds. As seeds are planted, it’s each individual’s choice as to what they will do with those seeds. They can cultivate them and let them grow or they can let them wither up and die. The choice is always yours to make.



This post is for any man or woman who’s in a relationship with someone whose in another relationship with someone else at the same time. As I ALWAYS say; people do to you exactly what you allow. We show people how to treat us when we continue to be their doormats (in some form or another). If we take it they’ll dish it out.

I want you to understand something; if you’re in a relationship with your significant other and he or she claims to love you, yet there is someone else in the picture; it’s a lie. The reason I say it’s a lie is because no one can love two. They may think they can, but they cannot.

Both women and men need to STOP getting involved with individuals who are already in relationships. It’s selfish and demeaning to yourself to do so. You will be strung along as long as you allow. The person who is stringing you alone don’t love you or his or her significant other. They may have feelings for you both, but the ONLY one they love is his or herself. It is him or her who’s getting the satisfaction they seek. If you’re on the receiving end you’re only a pawn in their scheme of lies. You’re being used.

There are times when I know the truth isn’t known. What I mean is this; people get involved with someone but don’t really know the person is in a relationship with someone else. I believe the reason they don’t know is because they’re completely led by their hearts. Too much has to happen to keep up this façade and when people are lead by their hearts they will miss the big picture (the truth). They will see signs of the truth, but they won’t face it. They will go along with him or her even though they see signs of untruth.

People in these types of relationships are lied to, brought, used, completely disrespected, etc. They are missing the “big picture.”  The one on the outside who’s foolishly involved in the relationship may be in love with the user, but the user certainly isn’t in love with him or her. They are emotionally involved, but it’s not love.

Love is gentle, patient, honest, selfless, giving, loyal, dedicated, kind, etc. It is not lies, cheating, irresponsible, self gratification, sneaking, lustful, etc. etc. If someone loves you, they will love you and no other woman or man. He or she will be loyal to you and you alone. He or she wouldn’t dare bring someone else into the relationship to defile it. Those who do are selfish and immature. They are out to please his or herself and are not thinking about the devastation they bring to their current relationships.

People must have self respect when they do they will then respect other people and other people’s relationships. They won’t go there. If a man or woman gives you excuses about why they’re still with someone or why they aren’t happy at home; let it go into one ear and straight out the other! Don’t fall for it, because the fact remains THEY ARE STILL IN THE RELATIONSHIP. Period!! If they’re still in their current relationship and approaching someone else, they are playing a game. They are a liar and they CANNOT be trusted.

STOP being led by your hearts and loins. If someone is already in a relationship they are OFF LIMITS to everyone else. I don’t care how many lies of misery they tell. Their looks, what they have, or the position they hold shouldn’t tempt you to fall into their trap. They are OFF limits!! All they will bring into your life is pain and heartache. You will find yourself sad and in an unhappy place and it will be your fault, because you accepted it. If you didn’t know in the beginning but found out later, yet continued to stay in the relationship it’s still your fault. It’s your fault because you can’t control what he or she does, you can only control yourself, yet your choice was to stay.

Millions don’t want to accept the truth. The reason people don’t like the truth is because they don’t want to hear it. They want to keep doing what they do without any repercussions. They lack self respect, mental/spiritual maturity, and a host of other things.

People who are getting into other relationships while knowing he or she’s in a current one doesn’t care about anyone but his or herself UNTIL they’re caught. When a decision must be made this is when who they care most about comes to the surface. Oftentimes it’s their significant other and other times it’s the other person. Then there are those who will get caught and lie to the end or say they’re sorry and that it’s over, but as soon as the smoke clears they will start doing the same thing over again.

No one can love two at the same time. They’re in  self denial to think so. The thought of it alone is enough to show this type of person is all about his or herself. They will bring drama into the lives of all involved in the relationship. Don’t be a partaker of this mess!

Blessings to you and you!



You took the big step to get out of your bad relationship, but you went right back. You feel so connected to the person, but it’s a distorted way you’ve been thinking and that way of thinking has you trapped in a relationship that has brought you nothing but heartache. Many individuals go back to bad relationships. It’s NOT because they’re truly in love with the individual (although really feel they do), it’s because of their own personal insecurities.

Think about it, a person has to be insecure along with other issues to keep leaving and going back into a bad situation. Most times when a person leaves and goes back it becomes worst. Every time you leave and go back you give power to the other individual. They know that they have that control over you. They know what to say and how to treat you to get you to come back and once you’re back they go back to doing what they were doing before you left. It’s a vicious cycle that often times end in tragedy.

Some of you knew the bad situations you were in before you chose to go deeper into them, YET you still chose to do so. It’s because of the mess inside of you. What’s inside pours out in the desires of the heart. You’re not thinking rationally, you’re allowing that feeling you’re experiencing to lead you wrong. Many of you are living a lie. You’re pretending to be happy for your family and friends, but in reality your far from it. Some of you are even afraid to leave. You’ve stayed way too long and now you’re too afraid to leave. On the other hand some of you feel you can’t do better. It’s all distorted thinking and the wrong way of believing.

Stop seeking something in someone else that you can’t give to yourself. Learn that you’re more important than anyone other than God. If you don’t love you (for real), then what you give and receive will not be what’s right for you. It will be something received through a wrong way of thinking and believing. It all comes from being messed up inside. We have to start dealing with who we are and cleaning out the junk, before we pile more stuff on it. No one can effectively deal with a relationship when they’re full of mess. It’s impossible. You can fake it, but the truth always shows in your bad decisions. It shows in what you accept from others and how you allow others to treat you.

Your significant others knows exactly where they have you! If you take anything and everything as I always say “it is exactly what you will get.” They will expect you to take it, because it’s what you’ve always done. The way you avoid bad situations is BY NOT GETTING INTO THEM IN THE FIRST PLACE. If you do you won’t have to worry about being fearful of leaving, getting abused, being trapped into something not good for you. If you’re being treated wrong from the start, NEVER move any further, remove yourself from that person and that situation. STOP thinking it’s a first and last time occurrence, more than likely it will not be. If a person gets away with it from the start, they are bound to try it again.

Remember, if you felt a need to leave you felt that way for a reason. Why do you think it will change if you went back? So many people have lost their lives by going back. No one should allow anyone to do them any kind of way they want. You shouldn’t give no one that type of power over you. If you lose your power you’ve lost control. If you let a person do you any way they feel, it gives the person strength to do something else. This is what happens in many relationships. Both men and women lose their power to who they’re with and freely I may add. It happens for many reasons, but the bottom line is IT SHOULDN’T EVER HAPPEN.

Stop leaving bad situations only to go back. Stop going back to receive more of what you were getting. Stop giving people the power to control and manipulate you and the situation. Stop getting into situations you know are bad for you by thinking with your brains FIRST. Start looking at your situations and analyzing them before getting off into the deep end. I don’t care how cute they are or what they have to offer. Stop being distracted by things that they’re using to lure you in and see the ENTIRE picture. Run as if you’re running for your life from situations that are bad for you, because before it’s over you just may be running for your life. It all can be avoided from the start.

Please start seeing the truth for what it is. Stop allowing your hearts to lead and guide you into bad situations. I do know some people go back and the situations sometimes changes and things get better. However, this takes growth and maturity. The person CAN’T remind the same and you think it’s going to get better. Some changing must occur. I’m trying to save somebody. In relationships such as this, some people lose their lives and others wish they were dead. People lose focus of who they are, they end up completely broken. No one EVER has to be in these types of situations, by seeing the truth from the very start and accepting it as such.