Author of Destruction

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I wanted to write about what is going on in the minds of people. Many people in this world are under the influence of the devil and they don’t know it. Too much evil is going on and societies are chalking it up as mental illness when it’s not. I heard on the news yesterday a woman stabbed her four children and their father to death. Tell me that’s not pure evil????????????

The devil is busy killing, stealing, and destroying. Those who haven’t uncovered the truth of what is going on with self will continue lives of dysfunction. They will continue on paths of destruction until they discover who they can be and stop embracing what they are. They then can recover and live the lives God intended.

People succumb too easily to the trick of the devil because they don’t really understand they are under his influence. When you’re not connected to Jesus you are capable of doing anything. People who aren’t in tune with self certainly aren’t in tune with God the Father and Jesus the Son.

The reason the devil is getting into the minds of people is because they are living by the flesh alone. They are in the world doing all the worldly things. They have focus on all of the wrong things. They are self absorbed and selfish; making things all about self.

Those who aren’t in tune with self are led by their negative ways of thinking. They get something into their heads/minds and although technically they know what they’re thinking isn’t right, they will continuously ponder over it until they develop feelings behind the thoughts; leading to negative actions behind the feelings. This is how people end up making bad choices and decisions; they are led by their negative and distorted ways of thinking. When you ponder long enough over negative thoughts you will more than likely act on those thoughts. People are giving power to the negativity until it takes over. This is a form of possession.

It’s nothing but the devil. He already know the minds of many people are weak. These people already have many unresolved issues they haven’t let go; which has already caused them to lead chaotic lives. It’s all destruction and the devil is the father of destruction. When you let him drive he takes over and control. This is what’s happening in the world many are under the influence of the devil and moving at his command without any resistant. This leads people to making some of the worst decisions and choices of their lives.

The powers of good and evil are in full effect. What we choose is what we choose. The devil don’t tight anyone up to serve him, he enters in through all of the avenues people make available. The devil doesn’t fight against those who are on his side; he simply leads them into further destruction and ultimately death. People must wake up!

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You’ve Made Your Past Your Present

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No one can move on if they haven’t let go of the past. The past is still the present for many people, because they refuse to let go of what they’ve gone through and have dealt with. This isn’t healthy for anyone. These types of people become content and trapped in their old ways of thinking, feeling, and acting. They wear it like a badge of honor.

A person can’t grow if they are stuck. Too many people give power to their pasts. They won’t let the memories go, therefore they are constantly bombarded with thoughts and feelings of what has happened. People get older, but they don’t grow and develop mentally, because they are caught up in their past and it corrupts their present. They don’t make any efforts to change. Their lives are full of woe it’s me, complaints, pain, and sorrow. Every time you see these individuals it’s the same draining thing all over again.

Millions sabotage their lives on a daily basis. They refuse to let go of things that are done and over. Living this way completely destroys the lives of many people. It brings nothing other than chaos and havoc into their lives. They live dysfunctional lives, causing it to pool into all areas of their lives. What’s even sadder is many of these people bring children into the world wreaking havoc into the lives of their children.

When people can’t let go they grow older and into destructive adults who are unhappy with their lives. They do unthinkable things, they associate with the wrong people, they have distorted thoughts and views, they repeatedly make bad choices and decisions, they are angry, and a host of other things. They allow their pain to affect every aspect of their lives, (home, work, relationships, etc).

No one is exempt from the troubles of this world. The difference is resiliency. It’s all about how people perceive and deal with what they’ve gone through or what they are going through. Those who choose to get past things will and those who choose to waddle, embrace, and hold on to the negativity will do so despite the turmoil it causes. People who won’t let go are often walking time bombs and if they aren’t they are miserable with self and life. They are angry and bitter and it disrupts their lives in every way.

People are products of their environments, but I believe they choose to be victims of their pasts. We all have pasts. God knows if I had of succumbed to some of what I’ve experienced where I would be. I’m grateful for even as a young child I bounced back and I was able to deal with things positively. I clearly remember looking at other people and saying to myself I do NOT want to be like him or her. As a young child I saw destruction and chose early on I didn’t want to have any parts of a negative lifestyle. God had His hands on me early in life, but of course I didn’t have a clue. Now I see clearly!!

I realize we all perceive things differently and deal with things differently. However, we ALL have the power to choose positive over negative. We all have the power to choose to let go! Some people do not want to grasp hold of positive nor do they want to let go. A person behave according to what they believe. If a person think they deserve less, it is how they will more than likely act.

My heart goes out to people who think they don’t deserve better. It goes out to people who don’t want to change. No one has to live this way. Open your hearts and minds to change. Know that if you can’t let go, it’s because you’re comfortable and familiar with old bad habits and negative ways of thinking. If you carry around negative thoughts it breeds the negative feelings and actions behind them. Today is a new day and a chance to choose change!!!

If you Accept it you Chose it

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The post is written about people who are in relationships and accepting whatever in the name of what they think is love. Many people are in relationships never meant for them to be in. I’m currently working on a book about this. I know many before me have written on the topic and many will write about it when I’m long gone. I feel it’s time I put my opinion about it in writing. I pray someone somewhere will learn something.

It’s terrible to see people in bad relationships. Unfortunately and sadly it is a personal choice of freewill. Many people choose bad relationships due to their own insecurities derived from a host of unresolved issues. If an issue isn’t resolved it leads to other problems.

In my opinion and without a doubt people get into relationships and miss all of the important signs telling them to proceed with cautious or RUN! They think they have the power to change the other person when they can’t even change self. Does it make any sense???? First of all, if you feel it’s necessary to change someone else, then you’re at least somewhat aware there is potential for a problem to occur. Why move forward???? This is a sign straight from the start. Sadly many continue in their relationships knowing full well something isn’t right.

Sometimes I look at people and literally want to shake them to wake them up. They are caught up in their feelings about the other person and it has them totally blind. Many are disrespected, neglected, rejected, disconnected, and subjected to all kinds of things. They take and accept things from the ones they love that they themselves would never do to them.

Some people feel the person they’re with deserves the best from them, therefore they do any and everything to please the individual. However, in the midst of it they receive the worst from the individual. It makes no sense at all. Never choose to be mistreated. If you accept it, you chose it! There are no and’s, if’s, or but’s about it!

The best recommendation I can give in this situation is to STOP it before it STARTS! Too many find themselves in loveless, unhappy, and unhealthy relationships because they failed to adhere to the many signs in the beginning. Instead of treading the water they jumped right into the deep end without a clue how to swim. Later feeling pulled under and drowning due to their bad choices and decisions.

When you meet someone you’re interested in, before losing your mind, use your brain! How you start any relationship is indicative to how it will end. If you get with a person who is abusive they will certainly eventually beat you whether mentally, emotionally, or physically. If you get with a person who is already in a relationship with someone else he or she is a cheater and eventually they will cheat on you. If you get with a person who has no ambition or goals don’t expect for him or her to change, so don’t make it a problem later. If you get with a person who is into immoral things, when it becomes a problem later, remember you chose it. If you get with someone who’s beliefs are different from yours, it’s what you chose. You can’t save no one, but yourself. You can’t change no one but yourself. I can go on for days with examples.

Bottom line and the moral to it all is you can’t change ANYONE else. You may inspire someone to want to change, but the individual is the one who makes the change happen, NOT YOU! Many people have changed temporarily to get what they wanted and then reverted back to who they really are. Why? It’s because they aren’t ready for real change. It can’t be forced. If you’re struggling with trying to change someone else, the real struggle should be with changing yourself.

If you get into a relationship being led solely by what you’re thinking and feelings about the person and not looking at the big picture, I guarantee you that you will later regret it. Get out of your feelings and see the truth for what it is. Most times people are stuck on how they are feeling about the other person; dismissing what the other person’s actions are saying how they feel about them.

Emotional and Physical Connections

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I don’t claim to be something I am not, however, there has been a great change in my life since making Jesus my choice. I don’t believe in fornication, adultery, or any form of sexual immorality, but I know many people live differently than I do, therefore as a writer, I have to write about what people are dealing with.

There are women who are attached emotionally to the men they want to be with which almost always leads to physical. Then there are men who are attached physically, but doesn’t necessarily mean they have the same type of emotional ties to who they’re with.

A person can not leave the decision to be drug along to the person who is doing the dragging. The  decision to be emotionally and physically connected to someone who’s only tied physically to you is a personal decision. Ladies, learn to value yourself more than this, because if you don’t; you will continue to find yourselves in relationships that are unhealthy for you. Some men find themselves in these types of relationships same as women.

We’ve all heard “women are emotional and men are physically.” I think this pertains to those who aren’t mature enough to handle a relationship. They aren’t ready for the commitment; they have too much baggage affecting how they deal with relationships (it’s all about sex/physical connection or it’s all about being with someone despite what you receive; a lot of women fall in this position, but oftentimes so do some men). All of the bad decisions, wrong choices, etc., comes from baggage festering inside, it corrupts the ability to make good sound decisions and choices.

If the truth be told, we are all physical and emotional creatures. It doesn’t mean a person has to be lead solely by one or the other. Those who are need to deal with their baggage and they need to mature (grow up)! If a man is lead solely by physical attraction, he needs to grow up. If a woman is lead solely by her emotions, she too needs to mature (grow up). In life mature men and woman know and understands no healthy relationship is built solely on a physical attraction or emotions. It will crash and burn!!

Women ARE in fact physical creatures! Before a woman wants to be with someone she has to have that physical attraction and what seals the deal are the emotions she feels from the total package. This can lead to a train wreck when who she’s with doesn’t feel the same in return. The problem is some women fall too fast for men who hasn’t fell for them. Many men are lead by what they see and it is also what drives most to seek after what they see. For men, there is always some type of emotional tie, but if he isn’t looking for a committed relationship he is able to disconnect the emotions from what he wants physically. Unfortunately a lot of women become too emotionally tied to men who don’t feel the same connection to them. This is why it’s important to get to know who you are with. People must learn to effectively communicate and know when they’re on the same accord.

Some women have a lot of drama in their relationships when they try to get something from the other person that the other person isn’t ready, willing, or able to give. It causes havoc in relationships! Too many people set themselves up for disaster from the start of their relationships. First of all, many get into relationships for the wrong reasons and in all of the wrong ways. There are many women who out of emotions believe  the men they are with really want to be with them, when the truth of the matter is their men only want to get with them on a physical level. These women feel because the men keep going back they feel the same way about them. This isn’t the truth, the truth is these men are able to separate any deep emotional feelings, from what they want physically. This makes him easily able to keep going back.  Some women continue to give themselves to these men in hoping they will change the minds of the men they are with. It doesn’t work! Why lose your mind wanting to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? He wants what you have, but he doesn’t want you! Get it!!

Bottom line is these types of relationships will never be healthy or lasting unless some serious change occurs. Remember I always say you teach the one you’re with or want to be with EXACTLY how to treat you. A person will continue to get from you exactly what they want if you freely give it no matter what IT is!

 

Seeing With Your Eyes Not Your Heart

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I know some of you will get the title while others won’t. The past 2 weeks I’ve been on a well deserved vacation. No matter where I go, I always seem to give out words of encouragement,  advice, opinions, recommendations, etc. It’s fine, I love walking in my calling at all times and anywhere.

It NEVER ceases to amaze me the many people who are dealing with similar issues. People ask your opinion, recommendation, or advice, but most times they won’t/don’t take it. Over and over without fail I’ve encountered both women and men who are in unhappy relationships. Honestly, I get it! I understand why people do what they do. Many of them don’t, but I get it. What I found is regardless of how many times you tell the truth, those who don’t want to receive it; won’t!

No matter how much information is available on relationships  people will continue to do it their way. No matter how long people go through their revolving doors of life, they will continue to do things their way. Some people hit rock bottom, yet don’t even understand that they are there. It’s so sad!!

I believe one of the most false statements is “follow your heart.” If a person is thinking right and acknowledging the truth as the truth, along with following their hearts ok, I agreed 200%. However, if a person is solely following their hearts this means they’re being lead by their wrongs ways of thinking. They are going solely off of what they are feeling and therefore unable to process the truth. They see with the eyes of their hearts and not at all with the eyes in their heads! In relationships many mess up by going solely  off of what they feel. People must understand, acknowledge, and know that their thoughts and feeling are correct. They will know it’s true by the way they’re treated. Learn how to listen to what is said and how you’re spoken to by the one you love. While you’re listening, you must see if the words line up with the actions. Love is shown through more than words, actions tell the true story!! In relationships people must see the truth and accept it for what it is and be able to move on.

What else do a person have to do to show you they aren’t as into you as you are into them???????????? If a person is unfulfilled in their relationship; they are unhappy. If a person is committed but the one they’re with is ONLY there, but not committed; they are unhappy. If a person is abused, ostracized, controlled (told what to do, how to do it, where to go, when you can go, who you can be around, etc); etc they are unhappy. If a person is being disrespected and mistreated in any form; they are unhappy. If a person gives all they have only to get NOTHING in return; they are unhappy. If you got into a relationship because you thought a baby would keep it together, but you found out you were wrong; you are unhappy. If you thought you could change him or her and found out it’s impossible, but now you’re stuck unhappily in a relationship; you’re unhappy. If you thought your love could save him or her, but you found out instead you’ve about lost your sanity and yourself in the process; you’re unhappy. If you got with them knowing they were with someone else and you found out sharing someone else’s man or woman isn’t right or easy; you’re unhappy. If a person has to walk on eggshells or are afraid of who they are with in any way, then they are unhappy. People who are unhappy in their relationships are people who are in unhealthy relationships.

I can go on for days, but I don’t have the time to do so. Individual’s must look beyond their feelings, because beyond their feelings lies the truth. See with your eyes wide open NOT wide shut. Meaning, see what is before you and not with your hearts. A person will show you EXACTLY what they think of you by the way they treat you. If you’re fine with being treated like poop, because you’re going off the feelings of your hearts, then you will be treated like poop!!!! You teach the person you’re with EXACTLY how to treat you! You are treated EXACTLY how you allow.

Too many people give the people they are with what they want, yet these people never get what they need in return from the people they are with. It doesn’t matter how much you love a person, if they don’t feel the same about you it WILL SHOW!!!! It will show in how they treat you; period! When a person is hell bent on loving a person who doesn’t truly love them in return, then what you get will be EXACTLY what you accepted and allowed. Stop being so fixated on how you feel about the other person that you are blind and start seeing and understanding what the other person feels for you.  It always shows in how you’re treated. It shows in how they speak to you, how they treat you when you’re in and out of their presence and in the presence of others. It’s shows in their faithfulness, loyalty, honesty, respect towards you (good or bad). It shows in willingness to effectively communicate with you. It shows in their willingness to share (giving and receiving) with you no matter what it is. It shows in their commitment to the relationship, and other things that are positive. In healthy and positive relationships people shouldn’t be strained, drained, or forced and it sure shouldn’t be one-sided.

Seeing What You’re Shown

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When you love yourself, this is very easy to do. You will be aware and you will NOT get into anything that isn’t good for you. Sadly many won’t do it, because although they’re seeking love they don’t love themselves and they don’t have a clue what love is. The reason many will miss what is shown to them is because they ONLY see what they want to see.

When you meet someone new they will always at some point show you who they REALLY are. Problem is those on the receiving end will not grasp the truth, they will be blind by what they’re feeling, wanting, and desiring.

You know the old saying “when someone show you who they are believe it.” This is true! People are shown the truth early on in their relationships, but they downplay it, because most times the person showing it is downplaying it. Oftentimes the individual will show their true colors in the form of a cover up. There are some people who are straight forward and show you who they are, but the person on the receiving in act as if they weren’t shown a thing. Then, later in the relationship they find themselves in very bad situations.

There are a lot unhealthy relationships in this world, but it is by choice. It’s a choice to get into one and it’s a choice to stay in it. Too many people stay in relationships that aren’t good for them. Too many people GET into relationships that aren’t good for them. You can’t stay in something you NEVER got into. Right?

If you pursue something you shouldn’t purse, you will face the consequences of your actions. When you get into relationships for the wrong reasons and in the wrong ways, you will face the consequences of your actions. Period, it never fails!!!

I’ve said this before and I will say it again and again. People treat you how you allow. You teach your significant others how to treat you! You do this by taking anything they dish out. You do this by doing ANYTHING to get them or to try to keep them. They’ve shown you who they are, and when they do they are showing you EXACTLY what you will get. Many are blind to it, because they are only thinking about what they feel, want, and desire. This is a sad state of mind to be in.

As I look at the relationships of many I see the same bad choices and decisions made over and over, just different faces tagged to them. If people would stop ignoring the truth they can make better choices and decisions. Instead they ONLY see what they want to see and because of it they end up in unhealthy and unhappy relationships.

I will go out on a limb to say most people are in these types of relationships, because they’re seeking something they’ve never had. They are individuals who are full of insecurities, self doubt, and other baggage. They are individual’s who don’t love themselves. An individual who loves him or herself, is careful about who they allow into their life. They don’t fall for just anything to get a little of something and they sure don’t give another person their power. They know how to give and receive love, because they know what it is and what it isn’t.

 

Loving the Hell Out of Them

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IT WON’T WORK!!!! Again, IT WON’T WORK! Too many people think this strategy works but it doesn’t. What I’m trying to convey is, no matter how much you love a person they are who they are and will be who they will be. No matter how much love you have for them it will not change them. There are countless amounts of people who think they are the ULTIMATE one who can change who they’re with. You’re living in a fairy tale.

Don’t misconstrue me, there are instances where people were motivated to change and the change was lasting. However, this will NEVER happen unless those needing change finally decide it’s time to do so. The individual chose to change. You can love the hell out of them, but it doesn’t mean your love is enough to change them or even to make them want to change.

Many people have lost themselves trying to change individual’s they love. People think they got it so good it’s good enough to keep who they’re with from straying or it will make them straighten up. NOT true! This is why many people are VERY unhappy in their relationships. They give every part of them to who they are with only to get taken for granted, used, and left brokenhearted.

I’ve always said and will forever say “people treat us exactly how we allow.” If you think by loving him or her with all of you is going to make your relationships better you’re wrong. You can’t make anyone love you the way you love them. We will never find anyone who feels exactly how we do about them, it will waver somewhere. That’s life and how it should be, because people are different. Problem is too many people stray way too far off the scale of compatibility. They think how they look, what they have, how good they are in bed, what they have to offer, etc will be enough to keep who they so desperately love, but that’s not REALITY! That’s not how it works!

A lot of people wonder why despite all the love they show; their relationships aren’t working. They can’t understand why their woman or man don’t love them the way they feel they should. You’ve addressed your own concern. It’s because, how YOU feel they should love you is NOT how they love you. You’re thinking on one level and they’re obviously thinking on another.

People are building relationships on their own hopes and dreams. People continuously get into these one-sided relationships. They know they’re one-sided by what they receive in the process, but they still think their love will be enough to make the relationship work. A relationship is built on two people NOT one. It doesn’t matter how much you love someone if they’re not on the same accord as you, it’s one-sided.

A person can tell you how much they love you and want to be with you, but if you don’t see those actions then it’s simply a bunch of lip service. Too many people are falling for this type of lip service; they’re caught up in how they’re feeling and NOT seeing the truth, because they have very wrong ways of thinking. They’re led by their feeling and emotions. This way of thinking messes millions of people up. They find they’ve weaved webs they didn’t want to be caught in.

I could talk about this all day, but I won’t; besides no matter how much people read it, hear it, etc; they will continue to be a part of dysfunctional relationships. Until a person look inward and see they are their own PROBLEM they will continue to think they can love the hell out of who they are with; no matter how reality is showing them it’s NOT the truth.