Trying to Keep a Non-Keeper

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All you will do is cause yourselves unnecessary heartaches and headaches. Too many people think they have something more special than the next. They think what hey have is so great it will keep who they want to be with. Nothing will keep a person who doesn’t want to be kept. Many people think because they are very into who they are with who they’re with are just as into them. Not always the truth. Matter of fact oftentimes it’s not true!

People miss the truth because they only see what they want. When a person is caught up in their feelings the signs are normally missed. They believe because they love who they are with and does things for him or her it will be enough to keep them. Not true!

Many people try hard to please who they are with. Sometimes it means putting up with foolishness. Some people subject themselves to ridiculous things thinking it will keep their significant other with them. Nothing keeps a person other than the person wanting to be kept. While you’re thinking it’s about you they are showing you it’s about them.

You can’t buy love, cook well enough, have good enough sex, provide enough, say enough, do enough, or anything else to make a person stay. If they are cheaters they will do what they do. No one can take him or her from you unless they want to go. Whatever’s in their heart is exactly what they will follow! Why? It’s because although they are in a relationship with you they aren’t committed to you, because it’s not about you. It’s about what they want and desire.

A lot of people get bend out of shape, sad, and depressed over a person who doesn’t want to do right! It makes no sense! If they do you wrong the first time shame on them, but if you keep allowing it to happen shame on you. As I’ve always said a person treats you only as you allow. If you don’t care enough about yourself to require better neither will they!

Many people are very blind to the truth. They only see what they want to see, because they want what they want. Some people do anything to keep who they are with when nothing works when a person doesn’t want to be kept! You will find yourselves in relationships yet alone, sad, and unhappy. People do this to self. Their eyes are open yet they’re blind by their feelings.

If who you are with can’t be faithful it’s because they’re an unfaithful person. You can’t change him or her. They have to want change and that’s the only way change will occur. If they aren’t ready to do so they won’t! You can give limitlessly, it will not keep a non- keeper!

Closed Eyes Can Be Opened

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Many people are in bad unhealthy relationships. I’ve mentioned before in other posts how if people start relationships out wrong they will end wrong. Some people get together for all of wrong reasons. There will always be consequences for it.

When a person know who they are with are willing to do anything to be with them they will use it to their advantage. This type of person doesn’t care for who they are with and will use them until there’s nothing left, until the person wakes up, or both. Individuals involved in these types of relationships always end up even more unhappy. They are already unhappy, then they get with negative people who adds fuel to the fire. It’s the behavior of two broken people.

Some individuals love when they have power over others. They love manipulating, using, and trying to control who they are with. They normally play the game very well through manipulation; making who they are with think they are genuine. When individuals are blind by their feelings they believe the genuineness is real. This negative and wrong ways of thinking has many stuck in bad situations.

Over the years I’ve seen many people subject themselves to situations they could have avoided. However, due to their negative mindsets they repeatedly find themselves in bad situations and/or relationships. They are seeking love when they don’t know or understand what love is or what it isn’t. They want to be loved when they don’t love self.

When a person doesn’t love self they will accept or allow anything. They fall for whatever feels good. They accept abuse and disrespect. The sad part is they don’t want to hear the truth nor do they want to see it. People who’s around them see it and try to tell them, but they won’t listen until their eyes open.

The scenario changes when eyes are opened. When an individual no longer pours out all they have, things drastically changes. When people no longer aacept abuse, mistreatment, control, or disrespect it changes everything. Sometimes who they are with will be angry and oftentimes become even more disrespectful. There are those individuals who despite the fact the person eyes are opened will still try to use manipulation to keep him or her. This is because although they didn’t care for the person they cared about what the person done for them (sex, shelter, money, material things, help with a job or career, etc). Sometimes things can escalate into something bad.

Sometimes a person is beat into realization either physically, emotionally, or mentally by the person they genuinely care about. They finally realize it’s not a healthy relationship and they want out. They are forced to see the truth. They are forced to deal with self. It leads them to realizing they have self worth and they deserve better. Some people get to this point while others don’t.

If people would stop always gravitating towards negativity from their negative experiences in this life they would understand experience is truly the greatest teacher. When they can see this they can grow. Instead many people are fixated only on the negative. They move through life holding in the negativity from their negative experiences. It always land people in bad situations and relationships.

Learning to face your issues, forgive, love self, and move on in life allows people to mature and grow. It helps people to progress and move forward! If not people remain stuck where they are. They will continue in life going through the same cycles of dysfunction. Unfortunately many will stay this way, because they’ve been this way for so long. They choose to continue to be led by their feelings. They refuse to face the issues that have them bound. Truth is eyes can become open, but it’s up to the individual. When a person is sick and tired they will seek change.

Jesus Loves Us Despite Our Sins

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This is true, but He doesn’t love our sins. People will do everything and anything and think because God loves us He will look over or dismiss our sins. Wrong! That isn’t the way it works. If you don’t believe in Jesus, God, or the Holy Ghost then living a controversial lifestyle is expected. However, when you are supposedly living for the Lord your lifestyle shouldn’t be controversial. The problem is way too many live controversial lifestyles and are offended when you tell them about themselves. It’s because they are for the world and not Jesus!

If a person thinks being loved by God means they aren’t held accountable for their sins they are dead wrong! Although He loves us He doesn’t give us a pass on our sins. We are expected to be peculiar people who live a certain type of way. We can’t say we love Him while living any kind of way. We can’t say we love Him and continue to live sin filled lives. If we Love God then we will live for Him. Our lives will change completely and totally! We won’t do what we used to do, we won’t think how we used to think, we won’t speak how we used to speak, the places we go and people we hang out with changes, etc, etc! We become new creatures in Christ. The best part about it is we don’t want any parts of the world! If as a Saint of God, a true Christian you are not a new creature; then you’re not a true Saint or true Christian. Period! There’s no in between!

Living for God means we should be walking by Faith and not by sight! It means we are both hearers and doers of the Word. We will live Holy lives. We are saved, born again, and Holy Ghosted filled. Many claim it but it’s not the truth and the lifestyles people live tells the truth of who side they are really on. Those who are pretending are imposters and their eyes are on man/their gods; NOT God the Father and His Son Jesus!

Many people lie about it, because they are man pleasers. They do what they do and speak as they do to please man. They mock and mimic God. They don’t understand the true meaning of serving the Lord; they are too busy serving man. They do many things that are not pleasing to the Lord and they make excuses for it. They are easily offended and always feel they’re being judged when you give them scripture. They often ask “who do you think you are to judge me or anyone? How is it judging when the Word of God (Bible) tells us exactly how we should live? It’s not according to the word of man, but the Word of God. A big issue is man is always trying to change God’s Word to make what they do okay. It’s never okay in the eyesight of God.

Living for the Lord is easy IF it’s what a person chooses to do. People make it hard when they are like petals in the wind. They have no roots! They go along with whatever sounds and feels good. They are neither “hot nor cold” they are “lukewarm.” Millions of people live this way and they think it’s alright because at points in their lives they talk or sing about Jesus or god. I put god, because there are many gods, but only one God! Anytime these individuals mention god or Jesus it’s to please man in some form or another. These are the charcteristics and behaviors of many who claim to be Saints of God. Their talk don’t align with their walk, period! These types of people aren’t called by God nor are they following Christ. They are following after the world and man! They are easily offended. They always want to debate the Word of God with you! They want to implement their false doctrines. They are inappropriate and they do inappropriate things. They are worldly people and they always make excuses for it! Own whatever it is you choose! You can’t serve God and gods!

These people think no matter what they do it’s okay. They believe the lifestyle they lead is okay with God, because the Bible says “for all have sinned and come short of the glory of God.” Yes, we have sinned and fallen short, but that doesn’t mean we should keep living sinful lives. If it weren’t possible to live Holy God wouldn’t have made it a requirement. If it weren’t possible to live Holy Jesus dying on the cross would have been in vain. People choose to be lukewarm out of their desires to remain in the world. To them the world has more to offer them than God. They think they’re having too much fun in the world to give it up to serve the Lord. It’s a very sad state of mind for anyone to be in.

There are absolutely no passes on doing wrong. God doesn’t EVER like the sin. He loves each of us, but if a person doesn’t give up their sinful ways they “will gain the whole world only to lose their soul.” Bottom line if you love Him you will live for Him. You will without qualms “turn from your wicked ways and seek his face.” Many people seek Him ONLY when it’s feasible for them. Yet they are red hot mad when things go wrong for them or for others. They blame God when they don’t even serve Him. If people believed in God and read their Bibles they would know we will endure both good and the bad. Sometimes it’s God’s doing and sometimes it’s your own doing. He allows it when it’s what we choose. Sometimes He allows it when we didn’t choose it in order for us to learn and grow! We can’t blame everything on the devil either, because people have free will either way! People want their lives to be trouble less and trouble free! People who feel this way are living by fantasy and NOT by Faith!

People who claim to be on the Lord’s side yet continue to live any kind of way; risk the possibility of being turnt over to a reprobate mind. That means you are on your own, God has taken His hands off of you, because you’ve refused to do what’s right! You choose to be lukewarm and NOT give up your old ways! He doesn’t like your sin at all and He will chastise us for our sins! People are fooling themselves, but never Jesus, God, or the Holy Spirit! If people want the world to be theirs it’s their choice! However, we all have to deal with the consequences of our choices!

Can’t Help Who You Love Is A Lie And An Excuse

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That’s right! It is an excuse and a big fat lie that has gotten many people in terrible situations. If a person can’t help who they love they have no self control. We definitely have the ability to control our feelings and emotions if we choose to. Many people don’t think they can and it’s because of their mindsets.

There are a lot of people who’ve gotten into relationships with people who should be off limits, period! People such as relatives, friend’s significant others, married individuals, single individuals who are in relationships already, underage individuals, and those you have authority over (on jobs, in the schools, churches, etc).

When individuals want to be with someone they don’t care who it is, how wrong it is, or perhaps how dangerous it may be or become. All they want is to be with who they want. I’ve written it and spoken about it a million times. The reason people do this is because of the flesh. They want what they want at any and all costs! They’re led solely by their wrong ways of thinking, feelings, and emotions. All they can see is who they want and that’s it, because they are seeing through eyes blind by their feelings.

The main reason people are this way is they have a lot of unresolved issues and the most important one is no self love. They seek love or something in others, because they lack it in self. I know some people may feel otherwise, but it’s the truth. Think about it; if you really love yourself the last thing you want to do is cause yourself problems leading to more heartache and pain. You wouldn’t want to cause yourself unnecessary problems with some possibly leading to serious legal issues. People do this when they involve themselves with people they shouldn’t be with. Some may lead to legal issues while all lead to headaches, heartaches, and pain!

To want someone or to fall in love is all based on thoughts and feelings despite how you get to that point. You don’t start having feelings unless they have been created and fueled by your thoughts. This is true in every situation possible NOT just in relationships. When a person really wants someone they start having major thoughts of them. The more they do then along comes the feelings. People give way too much power to their thoughts and it causes them major issues.

When you love yourself it took growth and maturity to get to that point. It took a lot of hard knocks through experiences. However, once you’re at that point there’s usually no turning back! It takes growth and maturity to walk away from the wrong people and the wrong situations. You see beyond your feelings! If you are attracted in anyway to the wrong person you know to get those feelings in check quickly and you will. You have the power to do the right thing if doing the right thing is what you choose. There are always consequences when you choose bad choices and decisions!

This is only “food for thought.”

Money Can’t Fix Brokenness

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True or false? I bet many of you have found this out the hard way. Most people who don’t have money or who don’t have a lot of money will do almost anything to get it. Sadly, some people with lots of money will also do almost anything to get more. Nothing is wrong with making money as long as you’re not obsessed with making it. People think money is the solution to all of their problems. Money helps, but it doesn’t solve all problems and honestly it ONLY solves money related issues.

Many people get into relationships with individuals because of what they have or for what they think they have. It’s the driving force in many relationships. After getting with who they want they find the individual is more broken then them. What’s inside of people is always coming out!

Money can help make a person look better, help a person to buy things or buy better things, go nice places, pay bills, get you what you want- desire- need, it helps people get into different positions and platforms opportunities (even though sometimes they aren’t qualified or suitable, but that’s what money get you). It gets you those things and a plethora of others. However, what it can’t ever do and won’t ever do is buy away brokenness.

Out of brokenness comes foolishness, crazy, unhappiness, sadness, depression, hate, envy, jealousy, suicidal & homicidal ideation, sexual immorality, cheaters, liars, mental stress, anxiety, lack self esteem, lack of confidence, co dependency, all types of addictions, ability to loveself or others, the ability to trust, and many other things. Money doesn’t have the power to change what dwells within. It can help with money related issues, but it can also make issues/situations worst.

Brokenness can cause some people who don’t have a lot of money to step on toes and/or necks to get more money, yet they are still unhappy. Some people who have plenty of money are still unhappy as ever. Nothing changes what’s inside other than change itself, which is nothing you can purchase with money!

People can fool you real good. They will look at you with a straight face while they are drowning in their own tears inside. Many people get accustomed to pretending it’s all okay when it isn’t. This mentality helps no one!

Many people have come to realize money doesn’t change the junk inside. They find themselves still suffering with the same issues. For many it has created more issues. When people are unhappy inside they’re never satisfied. They’re always seeking after something! Chasing the dollar has caused some people to do terrible things, which leads to more sorrow and pain. When people aren’t happy inside money won’t change that! It never has and never will.

As I’ve mentioned many times before, facing the person staring at you in the mirror is how change begins. No one can do this for you, but you! People pretend, run, hide, duck, and dodge from others, but guess who always right there? You and all of the pain inside. The pain and sorrow bottled up won’t go away on its own it’s something you must deal with in order to heal and grow mentally, emotionally, and maturely. Love from someone won’t do it and no amounts of money will do it. It is a task only you, the individual can accomplish. You have to want to change! It starts by changing your mindset and loving self! If a person doesn’t change what’s inside, they will continue to be unhappy people with or without money! ☹️

When You Don’t Know Your Worth

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Don’t expect for someone else to care about your worth if you don’t. People will treat you how you treat yourself and how you allow. One of the biggest problem people have in relationships is they don’t have requirements. Meaning they don’t identify what they will or won’t accept nor do they identify their needs. They don’t set boundaries nor do they have expectations. Most people simply go along with almost anything to be with who they think they want. They take a lot of nonsense in the name of what they consider as love.

Many people get into relationships based on their wants and desires and hardly ever based on their needs. They are lost and blind due to feelings and emotions. When a person is focused on their feelings, wants, and desires they actually fail to see what is happening right in their faces. Although they are in unhealthy relationships many can’t see it because they are focused on what they feel, want, and desire. They exhaust their energy trying to please who they are while getting nothing in return. These types of people are often mistreated and taken advantage of.

To know and understand your worth you must first love yourself. Many people don’t love self and are always seeking love in someone else. It almost always causes dysfunction in their lives. Individuals try hard to figure out their significant others when they don’t even know self. They try hard to make their significant others happy when they aren’t happy within self. They take nonsense in the name of love, because they don’t really know what love is. They are led by their feelings and emotions. They feel deeply with their hearts but don’t think with their brains. This leads to a life of chaos and dysfunction.

This is why many are seeking love no matter what or who and in the midst of it they find themselves in unhappy relationships with no requirements, boundaries, or standards. They accept anything. Guess what? They will always end up getting just that (anything). Too many people are very willing to settle just to be in a relationship. If you don’t know your worth it will cause many problems in your life. Regardless of what or who, you will always be treated how you allow.

When people are focused on getting what they think they want that’s all they see. Most times when they finally open their eyes to the truth they are in too deep. It’s very important people deal with their inner issues because if not they will suffer because of it. What’s inside is always coming out! Many people don’t know their worth because they have given power to their past which has kept them in negative ways of thinking therefore negative mindsets. They haven’t been able to move pass their negative ways of thinking about self due to what they’ve gone through at earlier stages in life. It’s not the past it’s how people choose to think about it that keeps them in negative states of mind.

Learning to love yourself should be priority for all. It’s not, but I wish it were. People hang on to pains and sorrows as if it were beneficial when it’s not! You won’t understand your worth until you learn to let go and love yourself. Many people are fixated on loving who they are with and because of it they don’t take the time or opportunity to love self. Until they do they will continue to have dysfunction in their lives. They will keep looking for something in others they don’t have in self. A person can tell what you think about yourself by what you allow in your life. If your worth isn’t important to you, then it won’t be to other people.

Can’t Satisfy Lust

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It’s like trying to fill a bottomless pit. People lust after many things trying to satisfy their flesh. In this post I’m referencing lust and relationships. Unfortunately a lot of people in relationships are lusting after the flesh. A lot of people are in relationships with people who are always cheating on them. If you keep allowing someone to cheat on you then you obviously don’t know your worth and you have no requirements in your relationships. You will always be treated exactly how you allow. When someone cheats it’s because they are chasing the desires of their flesh. What a person has at home will never keep the person at home without straying when they aren’t mentally mature and capable of being in a committed relationship. They have to fall in love with self first.

Many people are in relationships but aren’t committed. This includes single and married people. Until individuals deal with what has caused them to be the way they are they will continue to chase after the flesh. They will always lust after the next person that comes along. They are never fulfilled or satisfied. They don’t love self therefore it’s hard for them to truly love someone else. They can’t find happiness with anyone until they can find it within self.

Many of these types of people would rather get into relationships than be alone. Although they don’t know how to be committed they will still get into relationships knowing the drama they will cause. One of their favorite sayings is (I’m sorry). After awhile those words will fall on deaf ears. They will keep doing the same things even though they see how much they hurt their significant others.

A person chasing flesh will never be satisfied until they are no longer chasing after the flesh. The only way this happens is a change has to occur. A person can’t change without first dealing with their dysfunction and then developing a positive mindset change. With a positive mindset a person learns forgiveness and how to love self. They also learn happiness starts with self. Once this takes place maturity and growth happens. They then are mature enough to handle being in a committed relationship. Until this occurs they will never be happy with one person. They expect their significant other to be committed to them when they know they are expecting something they can’t give. They want to be trusted when they aren’t trustworthy.

It’s sad there are many people who are in these dysfunctional relationships. Some people never mature. They cheat all of their lives. It’s a pitiful, sad, and unfortunate way to live. Those who are in relationships with these individuals live unhappy lives in unfulfilled unhealthy relationships. Some people accept this behavior. When people accept it a lot of times they are hoping the person will change then most times they realize they don’t.

People who accept this repeated behavior must figure out why; just as the cheater need to deal with why they cheat. Cheaters can’t blame no one other than self. Nothing their significant others do will keep them home until they’re ready to stay home. A person can have the best of everything, but until they deal with self it will still never be enough, because you can’t satisfy lust!