Doing What is Right

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Doing the right thing because it’s the right thing to do. People know right from wrong, many just choose wrong. They will follow wrong no matter what. This is the sign something within these types of individuals is not right. People have many unresolved issues which has caused them to be who they are. Many learnt behaviors can be unlearned if people choose to change.

Many of my posts talks about the core, which is what lies within. What’s in is always coming out. Although people try to hide the truth it is always shown in some form. People hold on to negativity allowing it to hinder their progress versus trying to hold on to positive. They will pick the bad out of something good, because it’s what they see. It causes people to make mad choices and decisions in life. They are stay stuck in their negative ways of thinking.

Some people don’t care! The negative core within keeps them stuck in negative mental states of mind. Their views are distorted, therefore they gravitate towards wrong accepting it as right. They are quick to follow people who have like mental states. When a person chooses to follow wrong they are liable to fall for anything. It’s a very sad state of mind many have. We see it played out every day in the lives of many.

People can’t see the truth because they lack the ability to see it. The truth is obscured! Most of these types of people will defend wrong doings of others at all costs. One reason is they feel connected in some way. They have a sense of wanting to belong and because of it they will accept anything and everything, regardless of how ridiculous it may be.

Most people follow individuals who are famous or those who are at least known in some way. They accept anything they say or do. What people fail to realize is status, title, money, nor anything else makes a person exempt from core issues. Many of these people are also broken and have issues which also keeps them stuck even though they are successful or known. It shows in their actions, decisions, and choices. Although the dysfunction is evident it’s overlooked because people only see what they want.

The behavior is the same towards individuals who aren’t famous or known. People will follow who they choose to follow in order to feel relevant. They will get caught up in bad situations with bad people because they want to belong. They will get into situations with people who aren’t making good choices or decisions. They are easily coerced and persuaded. It all goes back to the issues held within the core. People have to choose to deal with what causes them stagnation and dysfunction. Until people take notice and accept they need to change, they won’t! When they don’t they will continue to find themselves in dysfunctional situations and relationships with others.

Until people literally face who stares back at them in the mirror they will not be able to move into better states of minds. They will continue to get older yet stay stuck in immature mindsets. They will continue to follow like minds. When the mindset doesn’t change neither will ways of thinking, feeling, or acting.

Anything Goes, But The Truth

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Sadly this is the world of today. Absolutely any and everything goes today. People will believe anything, but they won’t believe the truth. They won’t accept the truth as the truth. They would rather be told a lie than the truth. Sometimes I shake my head, because I watch how people are lied to and they eat it up. I would rather you hurt me with the truth than tell me a lie. The truth may hurt. However, you can learn from the truth, but if you believe a lie there’s no room to learn.

People will certainly oblige you by telling you exactly what they know you want to hear. Unfortunately the mindset of many is negative due to brokenness. They are looking for something. Many people don’t have a clue what that something is and it’s one reason they fall for anything. They believe whatever is told to them.

There is something wrong with people who would rather be told anything other than the truth! They are completely upset by the truth, even when they know it’s the truth! People like this definitely have issues they need to deal with. As long as you’re feeding them lies they will go along with it, but tell them the truth and everything changes. They can handle a lie, but they refuse to handle the truth. Something’s seriously wrong with that way of thinking!

Sometimes people don’t like other people, because they’ve heard tales about them. They don’t know if it’s true, but they go along with it. They mistreat individuals based on the lies they’ve heard! It’s sad, but it does happen.

When individuals are well-liked by people (famous are non famous) those people lie to them about almost anything. I don’t care what it is people will lie to them. They will lie to feel they are cool with them (in their own minds even though they may not know them) or to actually remain cool with them. They will lie to them out of a sense of belonging, out of loyalty, or out of a sense of connection. It doesn’t help an individual by being lied to nor does it help you to lie to someone. It stunts their growth and yours!

When people are mature, know and love self; they know they don’t have to lie to anyone to stroke an individual’s ego, they don’t have to lie to be cool with folks, they don’t have to lie to be in a clique, they don’t have to lie for approval or validation, they don’t have to lie because of the status of the other person, etc. Another important fact is when people know and love self they are wise enough to know when they are lied to!

I noticed too on this spiritual journey in life just how much people would rather hear a lie than the truth. They want their ears tickled. They want to hear the words sweet as honeycombs. Why? It’s because of the lifestyles they live. They rather be preached to and taught lies versus the truth. They prefer man”s word over God”s! They seem to believe if their pastors are teaching it then it must be the truth. Sad, sad, sad! They can’t see they’re being taught lies, because their eyes are on the pastors they’ve made their master. As I’ve said before their eyes are on the creature and not the Creator. They hold the lies in as if they are the truth and this is why many are being deceived and led astray!

In relationships individuals are being lied to. Their lies are accepted, because the people they are with would rather take a deaf ear and blind eye to the truth to stay with who they are with. This is why many are in unhappy and unhealthy relationships. They are being led by the eyes of their hearts. They can”t see past their feelings!

There is something wrong with a person who feels they have to lie and there’s something wrong with people who would rather be lied to. Until people change and learn to love self they will forever hold on to whatever is keeping them where they. They will stay trapped by their own negative mindsets. That”s the truth, the whole truth, and nothing, but the truth!

Good Or Bad The Past Shapes Us

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Ok, in saying that, I do NOT mean it dictates our future or present. It should not! However, what I am saying is exactly what I wrote “good or bad the past shapes us.” What I mean by this is what a person has endured in their past can have a grave affect on their rest of their lives depending on how it was perceived. A person can make good out of the bad or they can choose a life sentence of bad/negativity. We see it every single day! Many people don’t know how to cope so instead they lash out and project their pain on others through some form of abuse. Not all abuse is physical or sexual. Mental and emotional abuse can be just as devastating and debilitating.

There are a lot of good stories, but there are also a lot of bad stories. Anyone who chooses can make good from any bad situation. My focus is on helping people to overcome the negativity. Everything is based upon the mindset. How people think always affect how they feel and act. No one can change this but the individual.

I would be lying if I said the past doesn’t affect us, it does, but it doesn’t have to be in a negative way regardless of the negativity a person went through. The problem here is many people choose to hang on to the negativity versus moving on away from it. Everything each of us has gone through or will go through is a learning experience. I’ve always told you this! It teaches us what to do or what not to do! Experience is the greatest teacher IF people would choose to learn from it instead of using it as a life sentence of pain and negativity.

If you went through something painful as a child that’s very unfortunate, but my prayer is as a adult you understand you’re no longer a child. What started may have been bad, but through it a lesson is to be learned. If nothing else it is a lesson about people and how they can mistreat you. Just because a person is your mom, dad, sister, brother, uncle, aunt, cousin, grandparents, etc doesn’t mean they mean well by you. We assume so and we hope so, but it doesn’t mean they do or will. People regardless of who they are have their own demons and because they don’t deal with those demons they project their issues onto other people. They were probably victims at some point. Most times people who allow their pasts to wreak havoc in their lives will wreak havoc in the lives of other people. Sadly those other people are often family members sometimes not.

Any person who doesn’t deal with their past issues will live a life of lies and pretense. They will hide the truth because they know the truth is unacceptable and ugly. They KNOW IT! Therefore, they pretend to be something they are not this causes further dsyfunction. As long as a person does this they will never seek change as an option. They will always think as long as their pulling the wool over the eyes of people they are okay. No, this isn’t true! As long as a person pretend they will always live in negativity. It pools onto their children, family, friends, and others.

It is very sad when adults have children they bring into their cesspools ways of living, thinking, feeling, and acting. They taint their children with their toxicity often causing them mental, emotional, and physical harm. No child deserves this! That’s why this world is filled with broken people. People don’t choose to deal with their brokenness. Some people have the victim mentality for all of their lives. The cycle repeats itself.

This is why we see so much hatred, anger, homicide, suicide, depression, etc in this world, People have deep seated issues they refuse to deal with. Then on top of it they are searching for what’s lacking in their lives often latching on to someone as broken as they are. There are plenty people who are NOT coping well at all. Sometimes they end up murdering innocent people, killing themselves, committing road rage, fighting over significant others, cheating, being abusive, and a whole bunch of nonsense. They do these things, because they don’t know how to cope with the dysfunction in their lives. They keep on living and repeating the same cycles not even trying to change. It’s very sad!

Many people will say “you think I choose to be this way!” I will say absolutely yes! Why? It’s because it’s the truth. No one has to accept negativity in their lives. No one has to continue to cause chaos in their lives. No has to be filled with hate and anger. I can list a whole page of things. The moral is no one has to continue a life of negative ways of thinking, acting, and feeling. All of it comes from what lies within you! No matter who help plant the seeds it is the individual who cultivates them to go. Until individuals deal with the root of their problems those problems will continue to exist. Individuals often have their own problems and at the same time will try to deal with the dysfunction of the people they allow into their lives. It never works!

The past is exactly that! You can’t go back to it, but you can relive it in your memories. Our thoughts are formed by memories of something. The power you give them is how they are bound to control your life. A lot of people live as if they are still going through it. They are mad, angry, spiteful, filled with hatred, bitter, full of malice, holding grudges, etc for a life time when the experience is over. They have given complete power and control to their memories allowing their thoughts/ways of thinking to keep them held captive. They are held captive to their ways of thinking. They have formed completely negative mindsets which has affected all parts of their lives. No one on earth has to live in such a negative mindset. It’s up to you, the individual to decide you need to change.

Back to the title at hand. I believe without a doubt good or bad our pasts shape our lives. There’s not one person alive who live a negative dysfunctional life or a life of pretense who hasn’t been affected in a negative way by what they have gone through. They do not have to accept this negativity! Your life, my life, our lives are ours to live. In the beginning many others were involved in some way, regardless of what or who, the individual (you) has the power to overcome and be who you choose to become. Whether good or bad, that choice is the individual’s to make. Unfortunately, many choose a life time of discord when they don’t have to!

My prayer is people stop using their pasts as a crutch. Stop making excuses and stop holding on to negativity. Decide to live a beautiful peaceful life. Troubles will come and go for us all at some point, but nothing is to break us. If we learn from our experiences it will make us into stronger better people. It’s a choice. Even more importantly learn to love self. You can’t be of any good to anyone else in your life until you first learn to love self. Negativity has no benefit for the mind, body, or soul!

Dangerous Thoughts

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People don’t realize the power they give to their thoughts. It can be very dangerous. It has proven to lead to unthinkable situations. We all think about things, sometimes those things causes fear to rise up. If people succumb to those thoughts then fear can take over.

There are people who think about their pasts and they allow those thoughts to control their lives. The actual experiences are no more, they no longer exist. However, due to the power people give their memories they allow the thoughts of those experiences to keep them bound to them for a lifetime. They live unhappy chaotic lives due to the power they’ve given to their thoughts. They can’t seem to let things go, instead they hold on to the negative thoughts as if there is a benefit to it. These thoughts are so real and present to them, because of the power they’ve given to them. The thoughts produce anger, bitterness, hatred, etc.

Many people meet individuals they are attracted too, but they don’t look at the whole picture. All they see is their interest. Most times they don’t care if the person is married or with someone. All they care about is the interest they have in the individual. They begin to think about the person, the more they think about the person the more power they begin to give their thoughts. They don’t think about the whole situation and this is why people find themselves in mess! They can’t see past what they are feeling, because of what’s inside of them and the power they give to their thoughts.

We all have heard many times of people committing unthinkable acts such as homicide, suicide, and a host of other things to self and to others. Do you think they woke up and said I’m going to do this or that today? Nooooo, they do not! It is something they have thought about for a long time. They probably talked themselves into and out of it over and over until they finally succumbed to it. Sometimes people are coerced into things. Other people put the thoughts into their heads, but they are the one’s who chose to let it fester into powerful thoughts that eventually take over.

Bottom line of this post is this; we all have thoughts. If I sat here and said we all didn’t get off the wall thoughts sometimes; I would be a liar. I get them like everyone else. However, I’ve never ever thought to kill myself, kill someone else, or harm anyone. People who go that far have unresolved issues which has either led them to be coerced or the issues have caused them to be angry, bitter, depressed, etc. Something caused the thoughts, but the individual is the one who fueled the fire giving power to those thoughts.

I thank God, when I get an off the wall thought, I know it’s off the wall and I put the devil right where he belongs. I never entertain any foolish thoughts. I instantly say that is foolish or stupid and I dump it as quickly as it came. What people fail to understand is they can’t control what will come, but they can control whether they entertain those thoughts or not! You can control the power you give to your thoughts. You can choose if you allow other people to put negative thoughts in your head. If you know it’s wrong then you shouldn’t entertain it or the people who try to plant them in your head. Unfortunately this isn’t the case for many. Many people are easily coerced, persuaded, and influenced to do wrong. People who choose not to control the power they give their thoughts, the power of their thoughts control them.

Comfortable in Uncomfortable Situations

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I believe this is a major stumbling block for many. We will all have obstacles thrown in our paths by life in general. Many people make them into stumbling blocks instead of the stepping stones they are meant to be. People become stuck in their ways due to their pasts and fears. Their wrong ways of thinking affects how they feel and act. It causes debilitation and dysfunction. People are too comfortable with their uncomfortable ways of living. They complain, cry, and act out; yet they do nothing to change their situations.

So many are choosing the victim mentality. No matter what, people don’t have to live as victims. No one said life was a bed of pretty roses. Things are thrown at us from everywhere, but regardless of this truth, people still have a choice as to how they deal with those issues. Most problems for the individual is individual his or herself. Individuals cause themselves many unnecessary problems by getting into bad situations, bad relationships, and dealing with bad people. They make many bad decisions, because they are in bad places mentally. They don’t change, because they are comfortable and familiar with their situations despite the pain it causes to them and those around them.

You know when something is not right or right for you. Choosing to be involved with something or someone knowing it is or could potentially be a problem means you’re willfully choosing to do something you shouldn’t do! There are always consequences for what we do. Negative ways of thinking causes many people to make bad choices and decisions. People water things down by calling them mistakes. Truth is mistakes aren’t made nearly as much as bad choices and decisions! Don’t EVER go along with wrong to belong or to get along!

If you are trying to hide what you do in any form, then you know it’s wrong! I don’t care what IT is! Yet, many people do it and afterwards have to suffer great repercussions due to their actions they didn’t have to be involved with from the start. People get comfortable with this way of living.

The false perception of love messes a lot of people up. People try to find love when they don’t first love self. Many repeatedly make bad choices and decisions in the name of what they think is love. Trying to love someone who doesn’t love you, trying to be in a relationship with someone else when you’re already in a relationship or the person you’re trying to be in a relationship is in one already, loving someone who loves someone else, being with someone for material things, being with someone for titles or positions, being with someone because of family/friends, or a child. Being with someone who is showing you they are abusive, untrustworthy, controlling, possessive, or obsessive, etc. I can go on and on, but I hope you get the point. You know these things are wrong from the start, why do them or why get into these types of relationships? People cause their own problems on top of the obvious issues they have inside.

People are comfortable with how they are; some are content with it while others aren’t. The problem is either way, most do nothing about it. People are comfortable with their past pains. No matter how hurt they are and destructive their lives are they are comfortable in their uncomfortable situations. They don’t attempt to move forward. They stay stuck where they are. Their lives are like revolving doors year in and year out. They don’t learn from their lessons in life, they keep repeating the same cycles. This is being comfortable in an uncomfortable situation. They wonder why, why, why. I will tell you why. It’s you, you, you! You’re your own problem, because people who are this way don’t try to change their lives. They keep holding on to their pasts experiences as if they don’t have a future. The future is coming for us all, but many are stuck in their past experiences. They get too comfortable despite the chaos it brings to their lives. They give too much power to their pasts, to people, and things. No one on earth can mature and move forward in life stuck in this mind set. As their future approaches they continue to sabotage their possibilities, because they are stuck in wrong and negative ways of thinking

You are not your parents; it doesn’t matter if you look like or act like them. You aren’t what people say you are UNLESS you believe you are and if you do, it alone shows you don’t love yourself; you believe what is said about you. You don’t have to let people cross your personal boundaries, I don’t care who they are. You don’t have to let others put limits on your dreams and goals; they belong to you and you’re the ONLY one who should dictate what it is you choose to do. Most times people show you who they want you to see until the real deal surfaces. What’s inside is more powerful and it will always surface in some form or another. Don’t get comfortable in faking and pretending; you will NEVER grow this way. Learn to love yourself then you won’t have to pretend. People won’t understand your growth and some won’t accept it. It’s okay, it’s not about them! Don’t allow it to stunt your growth!

If people don’t want you in their life, keep it moving. Life will go on with or without you! Never kiss anyone’s butt to get them to love you or to get from point A to B. Know without doubt people will look you in the face and stab you in the back at the same time. They will tell you one thing and do another. They will hate on you, be envious, spiteful, jealous, etc. It’s because they don’t like what they are lacking. They waste time and energy with negative feelings about other people when they should put the time and energy into changing their lives. They have allowed people, things and life to hold them back, so they project their pains on other people who chose to move forward in life. Don’t allow these people to stop or block your growth! They will if you allow.

Don’t allow the troubles in life to keep you stagnant. Trouble will come, but it will also go. Learn from everything and allow nothing to make you feel you’re not capable of progressing in life. The power is in your hands to do so. If you give it away, you lose control. Never be comfortable in uncomfortable situations you DO NOT have to be in!

Unfaithful Accept it or Not

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You know it’s going on long before you act or react to it. A lot of people try to force something that shouldn’t be. They try to make people love them or want to stay when in reality you can’t. Unfortunately some people want to have a blind eye to the truth, it doesn’t make it any different. The truth is the truth. People can choose to do something about it or do nothing at all. Doing nothing at all is still doing something!

Life goes on! You can’t make a person stay or love you. If a person wants out open the door for them. If a person chooses to keep straying lock the door behind them when they go and don’t open it again. I’m not telling anyone to give up on their relationship. What I am saying is when in a relationship if you’re in a constant negative stay of mind it’s time to reexamine your relationship and yourself. When you no longer have any intimacy for your significant other it’s time to reassess. When you’re constantly arguing and fighting, it may be time to move on. If you have no peace of mind, it messes you up mentally, physically, and spiritually. When a person can’t stay faithful to you, then you learn to be faithful to yourself and send them down the road. People treat you how you let them treat you! No excuses!

MEN: Men who cheat almost never fail to show their hand. They simply lose their minds over someone new. They begin to do things they didn’t do before. They become bitter towards who they are with. They treat the one they supposed to love with disrespect and hatefulness. They dismiss the feelings and concerns of the one they are with. They always find an excuse to start an argument or to leave. They do stupid things, period!

Although responsible in some ways some men are still immature. These types of men are different, they are never satisfied with who they are with no matter how good. They want what they want without fully comprehending the risks. They normally try to control the one they are with even though they are out doing their thing. They don’t think things through, they simply go for what they want! They fail to realize the hurt and chaos they will cause. They are more interested in satisfying their flesh. Mature men, understand the risk and choose to be mature men to who they are with.

Maturity doesn’t necessarily come with age. Some people take a lot longer to mature. No matter how old some people are they are still led by their flesh. It’s sad! If a person don’t want to be committed in their relationship then they shouldn’t be in one. They should not be in any relationship until they deal with what’s causing them to be the way they are. Those who get into relationships do nothing but cause drama.

Individual’s who are constantly trying to be with other people when they are already in relationships don’t fully love self. If you don’t really love you, you can’t love someone else the way they deserve. These individual’s will always put aside what is right and wholesome to satisfy their flesh. Many people are making bad choices and decisions based on who they really are. What’s going on inside ruins what’s going on outside!

WOMEN: When a woman is with someone she will do all she can to make it work, but if there is no change her attitude will change and then her feelings and actions follow. If she meets someone who an thinks he’s given her what she’s not getting at home some women will stray. Some women will get so fed up they will leave. I thinks it’s wrong to stray or to leave one person for another. The grass isn’t always greener on the other side! Women show their hands too. They begin to stop doing the things they used to do. They find excuses also, they’ll do anything to get away from who they are with.

A lot of the problem with people is many get into relationships for all of the wrong reason. Most times when it’s wrong, the same way it started will normally be how it ends. You can’t expect to get into a relationship the wrong way and something great come from it. Most times it won’t work!

If you can’t love who you’re with, then perhaps you need to move on. Trying to stay where you’re not loved and respected is hard. Staying with someone when you are always straying is wrong. If you’re not happy with who you’re with why stay? I know for many people straying has nothing to do with who they are with, it has everything to do what’s going on inside of self that causes them to be who they are. At the end of the day I don’t care the reason, if a person can’t be faithful, they definitely shouldn’t be in a relationship. Many people in this world miss out on good relationships, because they are hanging on to bad ones!

YOUR ATTITUDE

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A person’s attitude can work for them or against them. When a person change their negative attitude it can alter their life. A lot of people walk around with bad attitudes and it’s an ugly sight to see. They point blame at everyone else for their situations, yet they forget to take a good look at the fingers pointing right back to self.

Sometimes we have to look at ourselves instead of always wanting to blame what we’re going through on others. Regardless of what, in order to move beyond any situation we must look at how we’re approaching that situation. If we have negative attitudes we will look at things in negative ways and will have negative actions; which will always make things more difficult than they have to be.

There are many people who are negative all of the time. These types of people bring gloom to their surroundings and they’re the type of people others don’t want to be around. Negative thinking breeds negative thought, talk, feelings, and actions. A negative party isn’t one positive people want to attend.

Bad attitudes comes from brokenness. The good news is anyone can change their life by changing their negative ways of thinking. Turn your frown into a smile and know that only YOU have the control to make a change in your life. I guarantee anyone if you consciously take charge of how you think and begin to monitor your negative ways of thinking facing them head on to foster change, your whole outlook on life will change. This begins and ends with you!!!!

You can blame whoever you want and the truth of the matter is it may have started with someone else, but it ends with YOU!! Don’t let what you’ve gone through cause you a lifetime of unhappiness because of your refusal to let it go. Many people are mad for a lifetime over things that happens many years ago. It’s a sad state of mind to be in. You use a lot of energy up holding on to negativity. If you hold on to it, it will keep you tied up and in bondage. I pray that you choose to let whatever it is go on today. Today is a new day for a new beginning!!!