There is a Price for Going Along With Wrong

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This message is for anyone who is going along with wrong. One thing about me is you can’t convince me to do wrong or to go along with wrong. You can count me out!! If a person don’t have ethics, morals, values, or integrity they are liable to do anything. It is very sad to see people go along with wrong because of being afraid for ANY reason. This post is about people who go along with wrong because they benefit in some way from it.

When you go along with wrong it doesn’t matter why you do it, you are a part of the problem; and you will someday have to pay the price for going along with wrong. Everyone has a right to speak up and stand up against wrong!

There are a lot of people who go along with wrong because they fear losing their jobs or they are afraid for other reasons. Bottom line you’re still wrong. Others go along with wrong because they think they have some benefit in doing it. Bottom line they are still wrong. You don’t get a free pass, because you are afraid. Wrong is wrong!

If you don’t stand for right, you are wrong! If you go along with wrong you are wrong! It will come back on you one way or the other. You may think because you have gotten over you’ve gotten by, WRONG! Karma returns and slaps us all upside the head.

A person who know they can get you to go along with wrong, know they have power and control over you. Never give anyone your power in any facet! Millions get used and abused because they relinquish their power to others. Remember I always say and write “we teach others how to treat us.” This is the truth! People treat you exactly how you allow. A person may try you, but they only get once chance UNLESS you give them the opportunity to continue doing what they do.

I know without a doubt there are some places I couldn’t and wouldn’t even want to work, because I will not go along with wrong. I won’t lie for you, but I won’t lie on you either! I don’t care who you are or what your position is, I will not lie for you! People who go along with wrong will someday pay the price for what they’ve said or done!

We should be dedicated and committed to what we do, but never at the price of doing wrong or going along with wrong. People who do definitely have issues of their own they need to deal with. They need to address why they are willing to sell out by doing wrong for anyone.

This was on my mind and I wanted to put it out there! God bless and I’m talking about God with the big G, the one and only God the Father who gave this world His ONLY begotten Son; Jesus!

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Sexual Misconduct

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There is so much attention on this topic lately, I wanted to chime in. This post is referencing adults who goes along with it. Shame on them! As a female I’ve had my share of episodes dealing with sexual misconduct, sexual innuendo’s, or whatever you want to call it. Personally for me, I don’t take it lightly and I will handle someone quickly, firmly, and with no remorse.

I salute anyone (male or female) who speaks up about this, however, I feel people need to nip it in the bud right away. Never, ever be afraid to put someone in their place; I don’t care who it is or their position or status (from who is considered the highest on the totem pole to the lowest). Nip it in the bud right away!

Some people may not agree with what I am about to write, but it won’t be the first time. It still doesn’t stop me from writing what I know to be true. My problem with some people is this! Many people have gone along with this mess for years, long enough to get what they want out of it, then they cry wolf later. Many have gotten jobs, promotions on the jobs, material possessions, and many other things, then once they’ve used the user, they want to cry wolf. This isn’t fair and this is my problem with of lot of it. Many people have put themselves in bad situations from the start. They agreed to rendezvous with certain people as if they don’t know what they’re expecting or at least hoping for. If a person ask you over to their hotel or home, that’s your first red flag; do not entertain them and nip it in the bud! If a person is saying something out of line, don’t make them think it’s okay. Put them in check on the spot, period! If a person touches you or does something inappropriate don’t make them think it was okay. Check them on the spot, period! I know what I’m writing is true. I’ve seen it happen countless times over the years in the civilian sector, the military, and the federal government! So there, that is my issue with people who go along then cry about it later.

An individual will do to you exactly what you allow them to do. We all know the difference between a compliment and someone who is completely out of line! Many people go along with things because of who they are. The individual’s who show sexual misconduct in anyway have their issues, but people who go along with it are dealing with their own as well.

I do realize there are people who are afraid to speak up. However, this too is a major sign something is going on within this type of person. Look inward and figure out why you would allow someone to do something out of line or inappropriate to you. Don’t spare anyone’s feelings, because they didn’t spare yours. You can’t allow a person to disrespect you and then turn around and feel obligated to protect them or spare their feelings. No; you put them in their place wherever they get out of line! I know many people are not like me (direct, etc). Still in my opinion it’s because something is going on inside which have given individual’s the mindset that others can do whatever they want to do to them. I’m just not that person and I’ve never been that type of person.

I’ve forever written and talked about how people with inappropriate behaviors are embedded in every single profession there is in this world. Many specifically chose certain professions to become a part of so they can get to certain targets or act a certain way (the way they really are). They get into positions of power and authority in thinking it will give them the ability to use this power and authority to get who and what they want. What they fail to understand is it isn’t about the power and authority they have, what they are being led by is their tainted hearts and distorted and wrong ways of thinking and doing. You can put a person in the highest possible position and if he or she is a fool, they will simply be a fool in that position. If they do inappropriate things he or she will still do so. It doesn’t matter how much or how little a person has, what’s in their hearts will come out!

People will find a way to do what is in their hearts to do no matter how inappropriate. Instead of people dealing with what they know is wrong with them, they go through life trying to mask the truth until the truth overtakes them and they are then exposed for the world to see. All of this behavior comes from somewhere way back. Their behaviors come from things they’ve suppressed and haven’t dealt with. Nine out of ten times at some point in these types of individuals lives; they were victims who now victimize. They try hiding their behaviors, but it DOESN’T work. Soon they can’t control their demons! It’s a surprise to the world, but the individual know what they’ve been doing all along in the “dark.”

Bottom line of this post is, stand up to anyone who acts inappropriate with you. Don’t wait, don’t worry about who they are, just nip it in the bud right away! If you don’t it’s like pushing a green light for them to continue. Remember, people do to you ONLY what you allow and what you let them get away with! We all know when a person stands up they are considered the bad guy. Hey, whatever! People are going to label you anyways. If ANYONE has a problem with a person standing up for his or self then know without a doubt they too have issues and it’s NOT your problem. Do what you have to do to protect yourself and never give someone a second in thinking they can do to you whatever they want!

Leader or not What’s in the Heart Comes out

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A real leader is servant first and they know how to lead by example. Regardless of what position a person holds it DOESN’T mean they are qualified to hold it. It doesn’t mean they have the skills or ability to lead. I see it every single day. I also saw it a lot as a soldier. I’ve written and said a million times you can put ANYONE in ANY position; status NOR money WILL change the type of heart a person has. The type of heart a person has will ALWAYS eventually show who you’re really dealing with! People can hide who they are from others until who they really are surfaces to the top. Whether good or bad; what’s inside is coming out one way or another!

A person who isn’t capable of leading properly can cause chaos for those around them; which ultimately leads to division. “A divided house can not stand.” When some people get into certain positions they think they are above the law and even God. Many people heads are in clouds, because they think they are untouchable. It’s straight vanity. God doesn’t appreciate vainness. One thing for sure (what goes up MUST come down) just as what’s in the heart WILL eventually come out!

Too many people are in positions with messed up and cold hearts. Many of these individuals are in positions of authority and power. They love controlling and having authority over others, because it gratifies them. They are individuals with a multitude of issues. They spew seeds of division amongst people. Why? It’s because of their hearts. These types of people have issues which has caused them to be the way they are and many of them think the way they are is okay. Wrong!

Sadly society is fixated on the positions people hold and NOT whether or not people are capable of holding the positions they are in. If you’re a broken person how on earth can you lead others? It’s like the blind leading the blind. The outcome is division and oftentimes destruction in the lives of others. Bottom line is as the Bible says “how can the blind lead the blind less they both fall in the ditch.”

In this world messed up individuals are embedded throughout the world in different positions; some are positions of power while others are not. They love control and authority and are oftentimes demanding of respect; yet gives none. The outcome is always the same (division, chaos, and drama). The heart will NOT change unless people choose to change their ways of thinking. These people were directly taught distorted and wrongs of thinking or either they developed distorted and wrongs of thinking due to past issues. They move along in and out of positions with the same messed up mentalities. They prey on others, especially those they see as weak and vulnerable.

There are a lot of people with hidden agendas. They get into positions to play out their hidden agendas. Certain positions allows them access to do just that! What’s in the heart will always come out of you! It only lays dormant until it rises to the surface. People can’t contain their demons. What’s in is coming out!

Consequences

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There are consequences for your actions. If people would take time to think over the possible consequences of their actions, many would probably choose differently. Instead people move based on what’s in their hearts. Our hearts hold all of who we are whether good or bad.

Cheaters – Understand if you are a cheater there are consequences to your cheating. You risk many things such as losing your significant other, separation within your relationships, diseases, or even death. When a person willfully cheats they risk the consequences of what may happen as a result of their actions.  Is it worth the risk? Think about that before you cross the line! To cheat isn’t a mistake it’s a bad decision. It’s bad choices based on what’s in a person’s heart. People are led by their thoughts and ultimately their hearts. If a person feel they want something badly enough the thought of it becomes frequent and provoking until the person acts on getting what they want. People who do this don’t really think of the consequences or they simply don’t care.

Security – Just what does it mean to you? If you’re a person who is basing your security on someone else you are WRONG! This is a huge bad decision! I believe if a person freely and willfully give their  power to someone else their power will be taken. Don’t base your livelihood, happiness, or security on someone else, because when you do you’re setting yourself up for anything. If you choose to you WILL some day suffer consequences for your actions! There’s nothing wrong with being taken care of by your significant other, however be able to take care of yourself if all else fails.

Relationships- If you get into them for the wrong reasons or stay in them for the wrong reasons you will have to deal with the consequences of your actions. People show you just who they are if you receive it. You teach your significant others EXACTLY how to treat you! If you take their foolishness (abuse, cheating, lying, or whatever it is), they will dish it out. I believe despite of what is said, a person willfully choose the type of relationship they become a part of, UNLESS they are in a country where it’s chosen for them. If a relationship is unhealthy and you stay, that is a personal choice, but it always comes with consequences, heartache, and pain.

What’s in the heart – It will surely come out! You know better than any other human who you are and what you are. Meaning you know exactly what lies within despite the fact you try to hide it. What you do in the dark will come to the light if you keep doing it and sometimes even if you stopped doing it. You try to hide all of your mess from man, you pretend to be one way when you KNOW you’re something else all together. Sooner or later your truth is revealed and there will be consequences for your actions!

Love – Most don’t even know what it is, but they are desperately seeking it (all the wrong ways, wrong people, wrong places, and you name it). These types of people accept anything in the name of what they think is love. These people go above and beyond in the name of what they think is love, even when they’re crapped on. They are abused, controlled, cheated on, lied too, manipulated, used for sex, used for what they have, they do things they wouldn’t normally do and don’t want to do, and many other things. People will walk and stomp all over you for as long as you lay down like a rug. They know your type and they will treat you how you allow. Love is kind, patience, giving, understanding, faithful, loyal, commitment, etc.

Love can be simulated, replicated,  and imitated, but real love can’t be duplicated when it’s genuine. If it’s not genuine it shows in how you’re treated, if you’re blind by your emotions you will miss the truth! A duplication is a copy, therefore it’s NOT the real deal. In relationships those who are pretending to get what they want will soon show who they really are and what they are about. Stop becoming lost and fixated on how you feel and start looking at how you’re treated in it lies the truth. A person who’s in a relationship for any reason other than being in love with who they are with will sooner or later show the truth concerning how they REALLY feel about who they are with. “People Lie, but the Signs Don’t” trust and believe the signs are always there. If you miss them you will eventually suffer the consequences of your actions. Guaranteed!

 

 

 

Seeing What You’re Shown

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When you love yourself, this is very easy to do. You will be aware and you will NOT get into anything that isn’t good for you. Sadly many won’t do it, because although they’re seeking love they don’t love themselves and they don’t have a clue what love is. The reason many will miss what is shown to them is because they ONLY see what they want to see.

When you meet someone new they will always at some point show you who they REALLY are. Problem is those on the receiving end will not grasp the truth, they will be blind by what they’re feeling, wanting, and desiring.

You know the old saying “when someone show you who they are believe it.” This is true! People are shown the truth early on in their relationships, but they downplay it, because most times the person showing it is downplaying it. Oftentimes the individual will show their true colors in the form of a cover up. There are some people who are straight forward and show you who they are, but the person on the receiving in act as if they weren’t shown a thing. Then, later in the relationship they find themselves in very bad situations.

There are a lot unhealthy relationships in this world, but it is by choice. It’s a choice to get into one and it’s a choice to stay in it. Too many people stay in relationships that aren’t good for them. Too many people GET into relationships that aren’t good for them. You can’t stay in something you NEVER got into. Right?

If you pursue something you shouldn’t purse, you will face the consequences of your actions. When you get into relationships for the wrong reasons and in the wrong ways, you will face the consequences of your actions. Period, it never fails!!!

I’ve said this before and I will say it again and again. People treat you how you allow. You teach your significant others how to treat you! You do this by taking anything they dish out. You do this by doing ANYTHING to get them or to try to keep them. They’ve shown you who they are, and when they do they are showing you EXACTLY what you will get. Many are blind to it, because they are only thinking about what they feel, want, and desire. This is a sad state of mind to be in.

As I look at the relationships of many I see the same bad choices and decisions made over and over, just different faces tagged to them. If people would stop ignoring the truth they can make better choices and decisions. Instead they ONLY see what they want to see and because of it they end up in unhealthy and unhappy relationships.

I will go out on a limb to say most people are in these types of relationships, because they’re seeking something they’ve never had. They are individuals who are full of insecurities, self doubt, and other baggage. They are individual’s who don’t love themselves. An individual who loves him or herself, is careful about who they allow into their life. They don’t fall for just anything to get a little of something and they sure don’t give another person their power. They know how to give and receive love, because they know what it is and what it isn’t.

 

Love and Abuse Don’t Go Together

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I felt a great need to write about this subject once again. In the past few days women have been killed by the men who supposedly love them. Today it happened about 15 minutes away from the city I live in; both were only twenty years old, she died and he tried to kill himself. This post is for both men and women. Although we don’t hear about it as much, men get abused as well.

If you accept anyone in your life who is abusive SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU! I’m not here to condemn or judge, I’m here to help someone. If you allow any type of abuse SOMETHING IS WRONG WITH YOU! Please seek help! Too many people are dying at the hands of those who supposedly love them. This isn’t love!!!! Harming or killing you is the last thing someone who truly loves you would imagine or even attempt doing.

People who show love by controlling you in any way has an issue and those who allow these types of people in their lives has issues as well. Love isn’t controlling, demanding, or abusive in any shape, form, or fashion.

If you get with someone and they are abusive, you need to exit the relationship from the start. Do not go any further. Don’t play with fire, because not only can you get burned(metaphorically speaking), you can end up dead!!!

Stop allowing abusive men and women into your lives. You think it’s special that they’re bad boys or bad girls, etc until they turn that same energy on you. Look at your situations and the people you’re involved with; and truly examine yourselves. If you’re being abused in any form you need to get out. It’s not love, it’s not funny, and is sure isn’t cute. You need to get out!!

It’s not love when you’re controlled or when you’re afraid of who you’re with. If that’s you, you’re in a bad situation and you’ve been there too long. Never give anyone the opportunity to think abusing you is okay; it’s not!

Abuse isn’t just physical, it comes in many forms such as mental, emotional, verbal, sexual, controlling, isolation from others, overbearing (they appear to be protecting, but they’re actually controlling and dominating you).

When a person gets involved with an abusive individual not only do they put themselves in harms way, they put those around them in harms way. A person can only fool you for so long. An abusive person will ALWAYS show who they really are, people miss it because they feel too much with their hearts until they dismiss signs of a potential problem. The signs are ALWAYS there! People have the tendency to see it when they’ve gotten in too deep and by then for many it’s too late. Your lives are precious and you only get one. No one has the right to abuse you, but too many of you give abusers the green light to do so.

The first mistake people make is going forth in relationships with those who have abusive tendencies. The second mistake people make is not walking away at the very first sign of abuse. The third mistake people make is accepting “I’m sorry” after the first incident. Stop giving another opportunity for something else to occur; when you do this you have given up your power and the abuser knows it. They know EXACTLY how to treat you, because you taught them how to treat you!

If you’re the type of person who is eager to love and have the willingness to take anything in the name of what you think is love; then anything is what you will get and at any time. The person you’re with will treat you exactly how they want too, because they know you will take it. They will manipulate you, because they know what it takes to keep you where you are.

It’s sad seeing women with their faces slashed, bodies burned, because they got gasoline threw on them, beat up publically; it’s all so very sad! It never ever should get to this point. Don’t allow your wrong way of thinking and loving put you in this situation.

Stop making excuses for staying, NONE of the excuses are worth it. People make excuses to stay, because they’ve lost control and power of their own lives. Why? It’s because they freely gave it from the start. People seek love in all of the wrong places and in all of the wrong ways. Why do you think this is so? I believe it’s because people are tainted from their pasts. Many seek love because they never received it as a child, etc. There are a million reasons fueling these types of behaviors (for both the abuser and the abused). The bottom line is people have to take responsibility for their lives regardless of what they’ve gone through. Stop blaming the way you are on other people or other things, because you have a choice to be exactly how you are. We all have the power to change if we choose too!!!

Not all people lose their physical lives, but many lose themselves to anxiety, depression, suicidal thoughts, low esteem, etc. etc. They lose themselves because they gave all they had to loving someone who wasn’t deserving (in the name of love). They gave their power to someone who took it.

Abusers comes in all shape, sizes, and colors. Regardless of who they are or what they do; abuse is abuse and abusers always show who they are in some way or another. Those who are are caught up in what they think is love will be led by their hearts into bad, unsafe, unhealthy, and draining relationships.

Learn how to build self esteem and confidence in yourselves, this way you won’t seek false love and security in someone else. If you don’t know where to begin there are many resources for help online, professional counseling, local social work services and community activities. Seek help!!! Learn to love you!!! If you do this you won’t EVER allow ANYONE to come along and mistreat you in any way. People treat you EXACTLY how you allow.

Life Goes On With Or Without You

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A lot of people inspire me to write about certain things. Today I want to tell you don’t give up! No matter the situation; no matter who, DON’T GIVE UP! There are many people in this world who are brokenhearted and completely at a point of giving up. In the whole scheme of things it’s not that person nor is it any particular situation that has caused you to feel this way or caused you to get to the point you’re at; IT’s YOU and how you’ve allowed things to affect you!!!!

Many times I’ve posted about how not to give your power to people or things. If you do; you can lose yourself in your situation if you’re not careful. Too many people have that save and fix it spirit. They want to save or fix the person they love so much; who by the way are causing them stress, anxiety, depression, etc. How can a person save someone else when they too need saving? It’s like the blind leading the blind. People do a lot of what they think is right in the name of love, until they find themselves messed up because of the situations they’re involved in. No individual can be in a healthy relationship if they’re carrying baggage from their past or previous relationships. We will always have the memories, but even memories fade IF we allow them too. Pasts are gone forever, it is the memories of people’s pasts that they continue to hold on tightly too. The memories are what fuels the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors/actions. It messes up many people for a life time.

If you’re in a relationship and the other person wants to get out, let them! You have no right to force them to stay. Stop giving your power to others and to your situations. Life goes on whether you roll with it or not. If you don’t roll with it, you’re stuck. You can find yourself in a place of misery, sadness, and confusion. Stop allowing people and things to define you. If a person no longer loves you, love yourself and have enough dignity and pride to move on. Life isn’t over. It didn’t begin with them and it won’t end with them. We as humans put too much stake in other people and by doing so we oftentimes end up in situations we regret.

No matter what is it; keep moving on. Troubles come and they go. Remember; if you process situations as if they’re unbearable and as if it’s the end of the world, then that’s how you will act towards those situation and it will show in your behaviors. People get twisted and tangled over their relationships and other situations, because they put too much stake in them and give too much power to those people and things.

I would never say not to love the one you’re with, but you have to understand it’s two in the relationship and you can’t make anyone love you no matter what you do UNLESS they choose too. Many people make their lives all about being loved by someone or loving someone,  when they don’t even love themselves. This is a clear sign something is wrong here!

People make life way harder than necessary. When it comes to relationships nothing is a surprise if you accept the truth as it’s presented and not lead blindly by emotions. Stop allowing your hearts to lead you where your brains are not following! Too many people want to give up on life when their relationships don’t work, this is VERY sad and it’s very clear these types of people don’t love themselves. These types of people are lead by their hearts and they’re seeking something to satisfy what’s missing in their lives. These are the types of individuals who are constantly dealing with emotional issues.

Same goes for different situations, no matter what; life goes on. If you didn’t get that promotion or job, then there are others. If whatever it is didn’t work out for you as long as you live there is another chance around the corner. It’s NEVER the situation or the person you love; it’s you! If you lose yourself in the midst of it all, then you have given up something valuable. That something valuable is your the ability to maintain the power that belongs to you. Any time you give it to someone or something; you will always find yourself on the short end of the stick.