Walking Away From the Start

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People must learn to do this! If people would walk away from things that aren’t right from the start many wouldn’t be in the predicaments they are in. People allow how they feel for a person get them into avoidable situations. I will guarantee you if you walk away from bad situations from the start it will save you drama and stress later on. For some walking away will save their lives.

I’m not saying walk away from a relationship without ever trying to work on it. I’m saying walk away from unhealthy people to avoid being in unhealthy relationships. You do this by adhering to the signs. Stop looking at the outer appearance, stop looking at what a person has to offer. A person can be rich and completely tainted and toxic. They aren’t worth the pain and suffering of being involved with them.

Many women get into relationships with men who clearly show them they aren’t right for them, but because they think they love their men they continue on with the relationships. Many later find they made bad choices and poor decisions. Too many women go solely off of how they are feeling about the guy instead of looking at what is actually taking place in their relationships. They go into relationships thinking their men will change, trying to save them, or thinking they can fix them. This is a foolish and immature way of thinking and it leaves women in bad unhealthy relationships. They are fixated on the sex, how he makes her feel, and basically it all is intertwined into how he makes her feel. These women seem to lose a grip on reality until finally their eyes are open, by then it’s too far gone.

Too many women subject their children to unhealthy and unsafe environments by allowing people who shouldn’t be around their children into their lives. Children can’t fend for themselves, they rely on their parents. Women who are too caught up in their men to see what is going on are women who have a lot of issues they need to deal with. It’s a sad situation for these women and their children.

Many women are allowing men to beat, molest, rape, and hurt their children mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually. It scars children for a lifetime. These types of women need to get their heads out of the sand. A man who mistreats a child is a man who will mistreat his woman. Wake up and protect your children. Too many children are becoming victims to the hands of their mom’s significant others. These types of things cause dysfunction in the lives of children then they grow to be dysfunctional adults making bad decisions like their parents. I’m not saying all children will grow into dysfunctional adults, but many will and we see it every single day in some facet in all walks of life.

Men get into relationships for the some of the same exact reasons. They think they can save a woman or fix her. They are captivated by the outer appearance (shallow thinking). They get caught up in their sexual feelings or what is being done for them and to them. Sex is sex, period. Some men and women may perform a little better than others, but the bottom line is sex is sex. Some men; same as women think the person they are with will change or that they can fix them. Men like women; allow what they are feeling in their hearts to lead them into making bad decisions and choices. This does nothing but cause chaos and havoc in the lives of many.

Walking away from bad situations prevents worse things from happening. I don’t care how good it makes a person feels, if it’s not a good relationship it is bad and therefore unhealthy and unsafe. When people stay in relationships too long they suffer the consequences of their bad choices and decisions in one way or another. Sometimes those around them suffer the consequences as well.

No man or woman has to be in unhappy, unhealthy, and unsafe relationships. People get into and stay in them by choice until one day they see the truth for what it is and by then they feel stuck there by some form of fear. It can all be avoided by paying attention to the signs and walking away before things goes too far. Love isn’t unkind, impatience, possessive, obsessive, or controlling. It isn’t verbal, physical, or emotional abuse in no sense of the word. If someone loves you they will not want to cause you or your loved ones any pain. Many people miss this because they are too focused on how they are feeling. They miss all the signs until it’s gone too far. Sad, but true!

IF THEY SHOW YOU WHO THEY ARE, PLEASE, PLEASE BELIEVE IT

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Listen ladies. I don’t know how many times I have to talk about this, but whatever the case I will continue on until people get it. If you’re in a relationship and the other person show you signs of who they are, “please” believe it! It’s no fluke, accident, or any of that, it is what it is. It’s a sign of what’s to come. If you accept it the first time it’s will happen again.

Please stop getting deeper into these unhealthy relationships. All you’re doing is putting yourselves in jeopardy and perhaps those around you in jeopardy as well. Haven’t you all seen the countless amounts of stories where significant others (ex, current, etc) have harmed or killed the individuals they were with and those who were around the person they killed? Wake up! Please stop getting in and/or staying in unhealthy relationships. It’s not good for you. It drains you and will break you down if you stay attached to this unhealthy lifestyle.

What’s really even more disturbing is that you’re bringing these men around your children. You’re showing your sons and daughters how to treat people and how to allow others to treat them. You’re teaching them this unhealthy lifestyle is acceptable when it’s NOT! Children do NOT ask to be born. They shouldn’t be subjected to such chaos. Your children should be priority NOT the man you’re with. Get your heads out of the dirt. Stop making excuses and stop accepting excuses.

It’s so sad to see young women who think they’re in love only to find themselves in bad situations that many have a hard time leaving and some who never leave because they are murdered by the ones who were suppose to love and cherish them. The big problem here most times the love is one way, but because people get quickly caught up in their feelings they fail to take notice of how they’re being treated. They are too worried about what they’re feeling, showing, and doing for the one they think they love. When you’re with someone you can’t see the truth if you’re being led by your emotions. If you’re blind by emotions you will end up in a lion’s den. Trust me! I’ve seen it and heard it over and over.

I don’t care how cute he is or what he has, it matters none at all. How he treats you is what matters. If he is up in your face crying and saying he can’t live without you or that he loves you to death. You need to move away from that relationship. You need to move on before it gets to that point. If he’s clingy and wants to always be with you or monitors your coming and going; something is wrong with this picture. If he controls what you’re doing; you’ve let it get too far. Listen, it’s NOT cute, it’s not him showing affection. It is clear signs that there could be potential danger to come.

Ladies, you must open up your eyes and stop being led totally by your hearts alone. You MUST see the truth and you must use your brains. Stop being foolish! A man who is mature and loves his significant other will treat her with respect and love. He isn’t  controlling, demanding, disrespectful, overbearing, or abusive.

Good looks are great, but they will not keep a relationship together. Sex is just sex and flesh taking control when it’s done outside of a marriage. Stop allowing your flesh to guide you into things you later regret. Many of you foolishly get pregnant in thinking he will change, but he won’t! If he’s a lazy bum when you met him it is not likely to change. Only difference is later on you will get tired of it and finally see the light, but by then it will be hard to get rid of him, because he will have gotten used to you taking care of him. If he’s abusive in any way at all whether physical, emotional, or verbally the time to leave is with the first episode. Stop giving first, second, third, etc chances when he doesn’t deserve the first one you gave him. He will continue to be abusive, he will more than likely not change, don’t risk it.

A man will do what you allow him to do. If you accept him any kind of way, any kind of way is what he will be and any kind of junk is what he will give you. It is no one’s fault but yours. These are avoidable situations, but women continue to get into these unhealthy relationships.

Work on you, because there’s obviously something wrong with any woman who feel she doesn’t deserve better. There’s something wrong with any woman who thinks she needs a baby with every man she gets with. Something is wrong any woman who allows a man to treat her any way he pleases. Something is wrong when any woman accepts any and everything from her man. Something is wrong when he’s rolling in your car and you’re stuck someone and can’t get home. Something is wrong when she’s getting out of bed for work while he’s sleeping in, because he doesn’t have a job. I can go on and on.

Ladies if he doesn’t have a job and isn’t trying to get one, RUN! You can’t survive on his looks unless he’s a working model. Otherwise looks doesn’t amount up to a hill of beans. Sex gets old and when you’re sick of it, then you get sick of him and by that time he’s gotten use to you taking care of him and will have a problem leaving. Stop raising these grown men!!

Stop getting into these unhealthy relationships. You’re your own problem and before you try to get into any relationship you need to work on you. If you work on you and figure out who you are, you will never allow just ANY old man in your life simply to say you have a man. Learn what’s important and what’s not important in a relationship. Stop being led by the emotions of your heart.

I want men to know that although I wrote this to the women, some of you fall into the same situations. Some of you are treated exactly like some of the women I’ve written about. A good man deserves nothing less than a good woman and vice versa; bottom line!!!